GENTLE ANNIE LOVE

NZ Truth, Issue 533, 4 September 1915, Page 6

GENTLE ANNIE LOVE

A Nasty Smack m the face Scene m Gishorne Magistrate's Court

Gisbin the Goldin is situated m an out-of-way place — somewhat inaccessible, like the Kaiser's place m the sun — and things happen there that would be considered remarkable elsewhere. A peculiar denouement took place as the grand finale of a recent Magistrate's Court case, m which a lady with the appropriate name of Annie Love biffed a bloke across the boko. The circumstances out of which the war arose were m connection with an affiliation case. It would appear that Annie Lovo HAD A LOVE CHILD, and she attributed this accident not to Mr. Love (Annie was married five years ago, but, so she asserted, only lived a fortnight with that Love), but to a gentleman with a name like anadvertisement on the casing of a> German mouth-organ. The allegedly gay papa was named August Zenker, and it was not the first time that Annie and Augie had brought judicial argument to bear on the matter of "encumbrance's" paternity. Lawyer Burnard appeared on behalf of Love, and Ditto Dawson as chaperon c for Zenker. Annie, who was duly sworn, proceeded to tell the whole an' nothln' but the whole, so 'elp 'er, and reckoned that there was nothing crepuscular m her mind as to the paternity of her offspring. She was quite willing to admit that she had reclined on the matrimonial couch with her State-guaran-teed husband, but that was over live years ago, and the subject of the trouble was now only four years of age. She had toiled as "housekeeper" to the Zenker man for seven long, weary years. Then Lawyer Dawson came to the trenches and demanded to know how many children she had had whose father (or fathers) had neglected to shackle themselves matrimonially to Annie previous to the nativity of the population as produced by tho lady. Annie boldly admitted that she had I produced three prospective producers. Then Lawyer Dawson used different tactics. He wanted Annie Lovo to enumerate the lovers with whom she had sinned, but Annie, if she had sinned, was silent. Whether her mental arithmetic was vapid or whether she was a better sport than some men are, docs not transpire. Perhaps she believed m the old song: He who kisses a fair, pretty girl and tells and makes a bother, Ought to have his nose cut off and never kiss another. Be that as it may, m answer. to Magistrate Barton's "You most answer the questions," Annie Love replied stubbornly, "I will not," Again Lawyer Dawson faced the foe and again was he ! STUBBORNLY REPULSED BY ANNIE. who refused to give up the citadel. Again did Magistrate Barton remind her that it was a vital question, and again did Annie refuse to tell either a lie or the truth. "On being asked, for the third time (by the S.M.) if she intended to give the show away, Annie utter a loud, defiant "No"! At that his Worship intimated that the show was over, as far as Annie was concerned, if she could not supply an answer to the pertinent question, and Annie tripped down smartly from tho box. She went across the Court to 'whore August was standing and passed him a sounding bash on the "boko." Then there was confusion counfounded. Lawyer Dawson asked that tho complaint be dismissed and the S.M. (possibly with tho dread prospect of Government aid for the infants m his eye) intimated that ho would givo Lawyer Burnard an opportunity of conferring with Annie; but Annie wasn't having any conferring. She left the hall of justice In high dudgeon, declaring that she would not answer such questions. Annie's representative then gracefully withdrew from the proceedings. In the corridor she again established contact with the enemy and dealt out divers kinds of punishment to him. August then entrenched himself behind MBobby" Butterworth till tho enemy gave up the defensive. »Sho eventually signified her Intention of bringing about the early demise of her forsaker by "doing for him," and she told him so m a vocabulary that would have made A BULLOCK-DRIVER BLUSH with modesty. < Anyhow, this country owes something to Annie who has produced that which the country so much needs and what tho Gisborne squattara never want on their stations — "encumbrances." Anyhow, the least that can bo said for tho much-loved Annie Love la that sho la a game sport.