Page 7 Advertisements Column 1

NZ Truth, Issue 442, 10 December 1913, Page 7

RECOLLECTIONS OF A LATCH-KEY. f v Y*3C''old:iax^t battered VH& bent. But I, remember jA 1 -the day when, bright and new, I jingled $S proudly on the big chain-ring of a prosperous )Jj householder. Those were peaceful, happy days. / But a change came. : The Young Gentleman of the house attained the latch-key age. One morning I was presented to him at the break East-table with many admonitions to treat me kindly and not to strain the privileges which I beThe Young Gentleman and I at once began a very riotous life, for which I; was mainly responsible. One- — cold winter night during my sporting career I was. left . . T^sticking m the outside keyhole. This I have .forgiven ; for I have since learned it was the result of an oversight rather than of malice. . But my Hf e of fi-ivolity closed then. I was found by the^old Gentleman, who immediately confiscated me. Then came another change. ' • a - One day a Man with a LoUd Voice came to the house and piffled; the furniture around, and niadc chalk-marks on the backs ot bureaus , and th#bottonis of chairs. A few days later a lot of visitors came. It Tt*B evidently some holiday, for a big flag was hung out of the parliA^nndow: The visitors plumped down m the easy-chairs ancT not tijink they were »aU hair." They jabbed thej mattresfe\nd poked canes and umbrellas at the pictures. _ lhe Old--GentleinWwas fcherei .aTpuUed me from the big nngajigave j ~3ne to The Man With the Loud Voice. 1 saw tears m the Old GenIleman's eyes. ; - \ » | For a lone time I hung on & hook m a real-estate office, with a^ greasy card tied to me. Then a Nice Bustling Old Lady^took me J away. Sheeal-ried me to,a man who made a dozen just like me. At this tiuie Ibogaii ynj downward oareer. I was given to th"c Young Woman m the third floor front. How my spirit revolted vhen 1 was tied, to a trunk-key with a' bit of blue ribbon! :■ ' ; One day there came a Tyiiewriting Girl to the room with the ■ Young Woman. The Typewriting Girl knew a lot of other girls, nnd they called very of ten on evenings and ate ham and crackers and drank tea they made ove^ the gas and told stories about young men. But' th'e Nice Bustling Old Lady made a fuss because the doorbell rang so often, khe said unpleasant things about third-floor lodgers." So, Instead of ringing the bell, the visitors stood across the street and whistled. Then the Young Woman would toss me out on the pavement. ' For the life of me I don't see how the trunk-key stood it. One night it was found that I was bent and would. not turn the latch. I was taken downstairs and The Nice Bustling Old Lady sent me to a man who put me m a vise and filed and pounded me. Then I went back; but, oh! my poor battered brass had been converted into an Area Door Key I , . I hang now on a nail m the kitchen. Igo out to the butcher's and theibaker's and have a day out with the pretty housemaid or the cook. Let me whisper— no, I won't tell on the cook. ELIJAH BROWN'S POETIC AMBITION. ELIJAH BROWN, the cobbler, was enamored of the muse, And all his time was given up to stanzas and to shoes. He scorned to live a tuneless life, inglorrously mute, And nightly laid his last aside, to' labor at his lute. For he had registered an oath that lyrical renown Should trumpet to the universe the worthy name of Brown. And though his own weak pinions failed to reach the heights of song, - His genius' hatched a brilliant scheme to help his oath along. So all his little youngster^ as they numerously came, Were christened after poets m the pantheon of fame, That their poetic prestige might impress them, and inspire A noble emulation to adopt the warbling lyre. So Vigil Brown and Dante Brown and Tasso Brown appeared, And Milton Brown and Byron Brown and Shakspere Brown were reared. Longfellow Brown and Schiller Brown arrived at man's estate, And Wordsworth Brown and Goldsmith Brown filled up the family slate. Old Brown believed his gifted boys, predestined to renown, In time would roll the boulder from the buried name of Brown. But still the epic is unsung, and still that worthy name Is missing from the pedestals upon the. hills of fame;. For Dante Brown"s a hawker m the vegetable line, ' And Byron Brown was toiling m a West-Coast coal mine ; Longfellow Brown, the light-weight, is a pugilist of note, And Goldsmith Brown's a deck-hand on an Auckland ferry-boat; In Wordsworth Brown New Zealand has an estimable cop, And Schiller Brown's an artist m a Chriatohurch barber-ahop j A roving tar is Virgil Brown upon the bounding seas, And Tasso Brown is usefully engaged m making cheese; The cobbler's bench is Milton Brown's, and there he pegs away, And Sbttkspere Brown works for the Gov. at nine shillings a day. | John Ludlow. f -PHOTOGRAPHS— . FRIENDS rriJIOSF. old pictures of yr^« PLEASE YOU I T ' S T * MF< t<)li ' ln kof , * father nod mother ' • • x those picture* of the arc very dear to you— \ Iwby before the weather jtf iccloi m fnct. / o \T/ # |U C« JS cts t°° warm. • .»'*t fair m tnlml that PjJ , llt. 5J We lik ** t0 let t?1 ™ your ch.Wrcti would chcr- N ** l '• TT *** °» ■ mnke ourstudlo their play i*'» ju>t »uch pictures of ; "*" house. J' OUt . TU* 'l'\wl means natural pio Hardle Shaw studios PROCESS ENGRAVING TRI-COLOR DLUVIVOI Dl fK^l/C For CoiiiiCry Newspapers end Business DL/l/Vl\O purposes supplied promptly at moderate rates. WE MAKE ALL THE BLOCKO FOR "TRUTH."