LOVE OR LUCRE?

NZ Truth, Issue 161, 18 July 1908, Page 5

LOVE OR LUCRE?

THE MATRIMONIAL MARKET.

Has the Marriage -agent Gone "to the Bogs"?

Henry JUboqplievs'S Satirical

Speculations.

Henry Laboiichere, the editor of Lon-don'-'Truth,''recently commentedadverse--ly as to the genuineness of a. matrimppial agency m that city. The result pf ftis adverse cpniment waa that he was invited tq make a personal inspection of the matripiqnial liureap. and tihereby to satisfy himself as tp the bona i\_\es qf its pro'prietqr, aMr Radford. He accepted the jnvitaftion. and was astoriisbied to disco Ver that the bureau was genuine. Uppn the list of the matrimonial agent were generals, doctors, wealthy wMows, and= numerous other persons regarded as eniipent|y desirable. Herei-iis a portion of tlie recording," Henry Lahbuchere's discoveries tiberp : — ' , "it learned of a general (of brevet rank), shortly retiring oh a pension of i.700 a Jrear, who" trusts that Mr Radford will manage to find for him what he had been unable to find fpr himself. Let him speak for "himself: — ,

"My intention m seeking a wife is tq secure a comfortable home with a bright, cheery companion. I am practically alone m the world. . '■'. lamof a bright, cheery disposition, and ap eas,y-gqipg nature. I ne\fer go half-way to meet trouble. My , figure is slight, my carriage very upright, .lath of a6t_tve ; habits, very fond of all 'kfiids Of sport, and prefer a country to •a tp-vyn life. lam fond of motoring. ..: ■t am not close or stingy about money matters, but just the reverse. I do not f amble at cards, nor bet on horse-racing, do not desire to marry a rich parveaue.

X DESIRE A L^DY py l>irth who will ma&e me a loving com-, panioh."

,Bpt she must haye £1000 a year or up.wartjs, and so the general, who never ' mpets trouble half-way, goes to Mr R^d- '• ford to ni.9yi.de her." Then there, is a .l'ieiftenant-cqlqnel, who j wants tq marry a young ■fciclbv qf between 25 and '3.5, without encumbrance^. He is not .particular as to Whether she is dark qr fair, but she must be slight and well m^jie, haye good teeth, and be thoroughly healthy, and possessed of an income from £250 tq-.'j£sou per annum.- Pecuniarily he is . j as good a bargain as the general, for h\s income is about the same, but I suppose the price increases with the rank of tihe Army candidate fpr matrimonial honors. This supposition is borne .out' by- the in-, come demanded of . - HIS PROSPECTIVE BRIDE by a major, whose description of himv self interested me expeeduigiy :— "lam a. man who has knocked about thp World a bit, am hot religious m the sense of' church-goipg, • but have rattier a high s:|a&ds,rd as regards honesty and slafalightoeS-! with my ; reilow-^nen. Am fah>_. ly gcfbd-^tempered and easy-gbing, though. ' rather strong-minded when I have determined to do a 'thing. Am f ond of ' all ouic -i dppr sports. ... $ky bridge for low -1 states, heing nq gambler: Am not a tee* 1 tpltalTer, though strictly temperate ; am i a smoker, rather Ipveterate, I'm afraid, frond of all outdoor sports.. Am prqbaqly 1 .selfish, having been a bachelor 39 years. .. . JKnally, if one may h^lie-ve female . reia-. am told that T wbuiip -wajlseA good Inland;, f'ta. no judge/* ; i And this excellent genldeman, plus an 'income of close on £iot)o* a year,- cannot ; fipd a maiden qfliis acquaintance with £250 per annum to %awe mm. $jq wonder that so many people are heard to declare that the Army is going to the dogs. 'Evidently it must either be the dqgd QJI THE MATRIMQNI AL ■ AG^NT. ' But the Army is npt the only prqfes.sion rep^ttiied m Mx Radford's 1 clientele. is a West En^ doctor, not yet fO, yhb wants a matrimonial partner with income equal to his own modest compe--1 tehee of gibbut £1000 a year. He desires— "A' true wife m the highest sense. One lean love, and who will love me (mqss impbrt&nt). .. . . She should bo a good ■ . hostess, sympathetic. . . . lam fond of , travel. Haye'been m all parts of the Old 'Hemisphere! Educated at Public School and University. Have, my M.D., M.R.C.S., L.it.O.P., etc. Also a teetotaller ap4 smoke a little.?' . , 1^ slems curious that he should have •po trflst to an agent to supply his requirements, for even if he has drawn the <_»d Hemisptere blank there still remains the New- But THIS DOCTOR-'S APPLICATION is not more remarkable than that qf a attached to a Legation ;in . tondon. This gentlemapi who declares that he has "a' thoroughly dean past and very fright . prospects ,'•' states thus what' hp; exppcts of his wife :— ' "Biirth and education as good as possible. Well bred, educated and refined; able *tp move m tSie very highest society, with a good social standing and able to ..take tip her position. . . A good temper -and health absolutely necessary, bright ancl cheerful disposition preferred by far. A loving, very lbying, kind-hearted aixd sweet-tempere«l girl is what I^want, a lovr Ing disposition above all. If she is graces ful, has some sense of humor, a pleasant voice, and stylish looks^ so much tire better. . . . Money nor any selfish hiotive being no object on my part I s'hquld expect her tq seek also happiness exclusiye"fy.» ■,■■■- A gentleman m the oil and tallow line, i ' p. business which brings him m £200 per annum,' seeks a "lovable spinster" with £'100 yearly income. A lonely bachelor, . 'who sticks' out for "an amiable and willr mg 1 partner m pleasure and business, with .pbt less than 4f150 a year, as a "fair guarantee that there are no p QO f rela- , "tlohs' to borrow continually," supplies '.-the '' ' I FOLLOWING FRANK CHARACTER SKETCH ; of himself : — ' :r "I may add lam hardly what vfquld be oa|led a society man. Rarely ' attend a 'party,' and do not dance. Up tb twelve months ago my time was taken up prac-; tically all' m biz. I am living easier now, having employed more l\ands— henqe my desire for the companionship qf a. lady. I have; made quite' enough to retire, but *the biz.! is too profitable to sell for' a ; song. Have, done this year several thousand: miles on mptor-bike. I haV e three horsesT-two working full ! and one sparer^ have nice rubber-tyred trap. But to all outside appearances, 1 suppose I am the ordinary' humble grocer," S>U c h are some of Mr Radford';, male clients at their own valuation. Mr Radford does not guarantee them any more than he do r es the ladies who apply to him to provide theni with husbands. The ladies, by the way, appear to be, as a rule, more cautious than the gentlemen. Thus the first application of a WIDOW OF GOOD O£.D FAMILY with £2000 a year and over 40, bears the following further particulars :— "Mrs X has filled m Mr Radford's paper, but before taking any steps Mrs X. would like tp know what fee she would have to pay before she. ,can have an introduction ? Also to explain that Airs K. is not her real name, and that she lives . . . but has given tho hotel address to ensure nothing being shpwii at home. . . Also that no man who is not a thorough gentleman of good faniily need write to her. She wishes to marry again as she is lonely and well off. Mrs X. is thought good-looking, and is a good manager m her home, and very cheerful and active, and fopd of music. Would prefer an army man (or retired) DOCTOR OR CURATE." This elusive lady is perhaps the pick oi Mr Radford's present stock, if one excepts the, middle-aged widow of a deceased knight who is willing to forego the . ■ title o.f "my la^y" fqT that of plain I "Mrs" if the proper suitor can be found. '