SORE LEGS!

NZ Truth, Issue 152, 16 May 1908, Page 5

SORE LEGS !

MRS. CORKERY AND THE CHOW.

How Many Limbs has Ah You Examined ?

A Yellow l Alien and His Quack Remedies.

/"Truth," and it is really not worth meD.tioniug,; has absolutely no time whatever for the Chow m any shape or form. He is neither useful nor ornamental. He is an economic enigma. He it is who would, were not the Law stringent, work at anything for next to nothing. We have him as vegetable' grower and seller ; he has captured the fruit markets ; he practically controls the fruit trade and were it not that the White is strong and fully determined on one point, the Yellow Agony would long ago have captured the furniture and cabinet-making industry, as He has m every city of Australia, and if he captured that industry m New Zealand he would underwork and undersell tfie white worker, who would have to. seek a crust horse-driving or street-sweeping or something or other provided by Government and municipality. Anyhow, this paper is this time m a facetious mood. It isn't going to curse the Chow, it is only going to laugh at him, and if others only laugh at him and some white-skinned fools a good purpose will be achieved. Now, we have heard of the Chow m all capacities. We a^l know how he fossicks on deserted goldflelds. We know how a White New Zealand Government "takes him under its paternal wiDg and thinks it's got a splendid retriever, when, after all, it's only a \mangy mongrel. We know how Charitable Aid Boards feed Mm from their hands and pity him and bury him, and "Trutlx" hopes they'll keep on burying them ; the people willingly consent to taxation for that sort of thing. Then we know how once, somewhere down South, the Mayor of a town actually employed a Chow man of all work, who actually nursed

THE MAYORESS' PULING INFANT and we know how everybody talked and thought Chow nurses would become the prevailing passion because the Yellow Pet Was so docile and clean, that he could, not abear the thought of a dirty baby, and that, therefore, baby would' be changed frequently and powdered, and all that sort of thing that only mothers and wetnurses wot of and arc adepts at, as become their natures. We know all this, and we further know that m New Zealand there are plenty of dirty yellow impostors who are quacks and who pretend to cure anything and everything, but, like the white-skinned quack, know full well how to bleed their victims, and they bleed 'em with success, too ! There are Chow quacks all over this "great" Dominion," who even ally their healing business with the washing industry. They , are plentiful enough m Wellington and can produce .score upon score of testimonials from White fools, who, having vbcen cured by doctors, rush off to the Chow quack to have the, finishing touches pat on and ascribe the wonderful cure to Ah Fat, and blow forth, his leprous praises on the least provocation, and the "darters" of the house havins; been ogled by. the Mongrel Mongolian, swear he is a gentleman and picture to themselves all sorts of things that their filthy minds can conjure up and yeaen to. be the wife of a Mandarin. Such things as these have happened m Wellington, and some foolish people vainly wonder how it could possibly happen that whites could be so simple as to have such implicit trust m a Chow, who is washerman by profession and quack on the cross. Anyhow, few of tbe fatuous fools have the temerity, the madness, • the silliness, the idiocy, or are ratty, barmy, stark-staring looney enough to blazon forth m public print the fact that Ah Ham Vor Ah Buck, or Tuck, or Chuck, has cured hijn or her of warts . or bunions or bellv-acue or specks before the eyes or lost manhood, or consulted him before being married, or any of the thousands tfnd thousands of ills and troubles that flesh is heir to. One, however, has been found, and she comes from Greymouth and her name is Corkery, and

SHE IS A CORKER, all right. This' is how the float or cork person did it m the "Grey River Argus," and it deserves republication for its uniqueness :— NOTICE. I, the Undersigned, can recommend Ah You and his Chinese remedy for sore legs > also for horses' foot rot. MRS CORKERY. Albe- i-street, Greymouth. Address :— Ah You, c/o Hop Lee, Laundry. Turumaha-street, Greymouth. Naturally. "Truth" is a stranger to Mrs Corker, and what is mpre, "Truth" prefers to remain strangers still. Now, to touch on a lady's leg is, we at once admit, a delicate and perhaps dangerous thing. Whether Ah You cured Mrs Corkery of sore legs or whether she heard tliat Ah You successfully cures sore legs or whether she had a sister, a brother, a cousin or an aunt cured of sore extremities, we can't say. Whose sore legs -were cured ? How were the legs made sore ? Was it through running after Ah You ? Has Mrs Corkery a cork leg ? Will she stake her existence on Ah ( You's remedies for sore legs ? are only a few of the questions that could be asked ; m fact, hundreds oi. questions might be asked on sore and dirty legs, on Mrs Corkery's legs or ' the sore or other legs that were cured, and that Mrs Corkery knows of. We're they shapely and divine limbs ? But there, howinell does Mrs Corkery the Corker know that Ah You's sovereign Chinese remedy is good for horses' foot rot, and we might be further tempted to ask has Mrs Corkery ever had footrot, but we won't. Anyhow, why does Ah You conteal himself m Hop Lee's laundry and not set up as an ordinary sore-leg healer m the ordinary sort of way ? And "Truth" doesn't want to be very offensive., but it simply does want to know how many other foolish women are there m Greymouth who have exposed their sore limbs to Ah You, and "Truth" further wants to know irom Ah You, c/o Hop Lee, if it pays to treat white women's sore legs ? In fact, it appears very much that m rushing into print m this degrading manner this female has only herself to blame if ridicule is cast on her and her legs or the lower limbs of any of her relations that were sore and healed by Ah You and ' .

HIS. WASH-HOUSE REMEDIES. This phase of the Chow question is iust a bit too. hot. The idea of a dirty Mongol setting up as a healer ami being pal> ronisetl and boomed by what no doubt is m her class a respectable and estimable woman, is utterly repugnant to the ordinary white mind. Let the yellow brute's remedies be tried on horses, and the vets, will no doubt see that the Chow doesn't dip too deep into their thorough-ly-studied business.' Mrs Corkery's boom of Ah ] You's- sore-leg remedy is, as it deserves (to be, the main source of ridicule m Greymouth.