WANGANUI WHACKS.

NZ Truth, Issue 60, 18 August 1906, Page 4

WANGANUI WHACKS.

The following telegram speaJks for , itself * Wanganui, ITO Sirjoe, Wellington. My loyalty and personal influence for the party has not abated one jot, although not included m the Ministry. How about the Upper House 1 Jimmy.

I wonder how many more telegrams Sir joe got of the same purport ; the only one about here would be "Fac-tors-made Sawdust," but he- ain't got any pusnal influence.

It is rumored that a member of the Management Committee of our Rugby Union received anout £90 for services rendered on our local football ground. It is advisable that members of such bodies, whether football, rowing, or cricket, etc., should not, whilst holding office, accept the position that is not honorary, as it has a tendency to destroy their independence of spirit, and opens the door for a lot of abuse. If it is not against the rules laid down by the executive committee of the N.Z. Rugby Union, a rule should be framed barring anyone receiving payment for services rendered whilst holding office as a committeeman.

, The Canterbury footballers gave us a highly instructive and pleasurable afternoon's sport. Their combination was too good for our men, .who lately have had bad luck m accidents to rep. players. ■, The visiting team were entertained at dinner, and Mendelsohn, six and eight pence as- per usual, got off great slabs of butter and slapped it about with no sparing hand. He said that the president was the great, greater, and greatest Rugby football enthusiast m the colony. The diners simultaneously reached for their glasses, and a gurgling sound was heard that drowned the exclamations of surprise that was just bubbling up m their throats. The writer had to take a cough lozenge to still his throat tickling.

We have an oarsman named Webb, who is as good as he is unpretentious, and an endeavor is being made to raise funds to further the scheme of training him, and pitting him against some of the second-class scullers over the other side, so his. merits can be gauged. Tom Ferry, one celebrated authority on sculling, says he (Webb) has a very good style,, and if he had him to train he would turn out something Al.

Our local post office is now. caged m, and the sweet and handsome officials, feel safe from the adoring smiles of sweet jam tarts with embroidery round the bottom. That they are well groomed and mo-less goes without saying, and their manners are simply "purfik." At odd intervals a bald-headed snipe of the valley appears m front of the cage, and all students of zoology wonder what class he belongs to, as two wings of hair rise up from, the back of his neck, and do graceful waves, round the front of his head, leaving his crown unthatched.

.A local merchant was fined £25 for sending whisky up the river. It seems strange that the river boats can sell spirituous liquors en voyage, although passing through a prohibited district. It is an easy guess who gave the show away, and it proves the old saying, set a thief to catch a thief. With the merchant it was simply negligence m not marking "whisky" on the case ; there was no attempt to smuggle the goods m. The penalty seems stiff under the circumstances, but the power behind the throne alters the fine.

If Wellingtonians think they can just come here and pick out the currants m our cake, well, we will read the Riot Act. The big rag firm decided to build an up-to-date warehouse, and the local papers said that a leading firm of builders here* had the job, and the swindlecate were happy. But, between the cup and the lip there is many a slip, and a Wellington firm sprung a surprise and collared the bun. Our builders mean to invade your territory and wipe the floor with you. An alphabetical architect tried to get the job, but, less tail m the letter line and moTe practical knowledge scooped the pool.