JIM THE MILKER.

NZ Truth, Issue 59, 4 August 1906, Page 4

JIM THE MILKER.

Tells of His First Seance m - Spookland.

Extraordinary "Control" of theBoss's Wife, alias Madam Sharkey.

Sir,~We got up to the spook hall m good time and there was a large gatherin 1 . Aint it strange that aJI epookists appear as if they was welted with a cat of nine tails ? Well, if yer were gided by them looks yer would be wrong ; they are the most goyfuil peepul extant "at this date on the hole face of the earth. Great Moses, yer should see them comming out of the spook hall. Every man has his nebours wife (affinities) and yer will see them sculking round the back streets arm m arm, if yer please ; it makes a desint cove fair wild. Now, I am going to tell yer about me and the bosses wife. We went to the spook hall where Madam Sharkey .was to purform and she did purform. We went into a large room where there was many persons ; it was pafchetick. The whole push of them was settiri as if they had a poker down their throats, all waiting for proffesor Sharkey and the bosses wife. When we arrived we sat down m a cyrcle ; then . the bosses wife showed heir points. In the first case she shut her eyes gave a grunt . and pretended that she was under control. .She cut several strange, capers «and r aiiswered several -questions, which was received well. Yer .could hear them saying one to another did yer ever hear the like of that, then all at once the bosses wife (alias Madam Sharkey) gave a great yell, grabbed a chair and roared where is Jim the milker by cripes give me his liver give me his hart ; it jnust be done clean and desint. With this she got a grip of a poker and tried to bash all hands ; then she fell down and squirmed on the floor foaming at the mouth and kicking up her heels. Then the chareman said stand off the medium keep away she is under control. Keep off then he addressed the control saying will yer leave tae medium alone ? Then Madam Sharkey arose got a stick that was handy and smashed the fumichure then she went into a quiet sleep. There was peas for a time the chareman asked me if I knew any ( reeson for the capers of Madam Sharkey. Then I told him the strait. dincum. Yer must perceive that me • and Madam Sharkey has a high mission to fulfill and meny traps: are laid for us m New York a!millioner fell m love with Madam Sharkey. and made many indescint perposuls to her, which was reppelled with skorn, when I come to hear of the business there was hell to pay so I then went on his trail and chased him right up to Hudson's Bay 4000 miles where we met on the ice. Great god we fought from sun set till morning but at larst the, Lord prevailed, I ripped him up with -me bowie knife tore off his scalp and came home. Well yer would have thought this would have contented the man. But no the villian still persues her and threatens her that when he lerns the trick of materlizing himself he will do a damd sight worse. My oath let me catch him. After me explernation the. woming arose up and said what a bad wretch. HereMadam Sharkey falls down m a fit he is at me again lord deliver us from evil spirits it took me and a lot more of them to quiet her down. I heard a jocker say something about a strong smell of drink o n the premices. I focused that man with me eye which is fearce. When the bosses wife (Madam Sharkey) and me got home we thought we might have overdone the' job hut as we are raking m the plunder we are content. We got twenty five quids out of the job and were sad to think that the Jackass was so plenty m the land. Well, we had some whisky hot and went to bed me and the bosses wife. She is a good un. JIM THE MILKER.