THE PROFESSOR'S WOOING

New Zealand Times, Volume XXXI, Issue 6861, 3 July 1909, Page 5

THE PROFESSOR'S WOOING

Dr, Haldane} at one time a profes< sor of St. Andrew's University (Scotland), was a very shy man. This failing prevented him from asking any lady to become bis wifo until be was well advanced in life.

However, be plucked up courage one day, redecorated his house, and went to call on the object of his affections.

Thor lady, Seeing the doctor's embarrassment, opened fire. "Weel, doctor, hao ye got through a' your papering and painting yet? I'm told your now carpets are just beautiful. They say ..the pattern o' the dining-room chair's - 'is' just quite out o' the way— that everything aboot the lioiiao is just perfect." Here was a* providential opening, -vhich he was not such a goose as to overlook. He advanced his chair, sidled towards her, simpering the while, raised his eyes furtively to her face,' and said, with a gentle inflection of ..his. voice, which no ear but a wilfijUy'denf one could have misinterpreted. "Na. Xa. • Miss Jane, it'3 no •mite perfect. • It canna' be quite as Jong as. there's ae thing wanting!" *';.:\ncl what can that be?" asked the imperturablc spinster.

Utterly thrown on, his beam ends by her wilful blindness?/ to his meaning, .the; poor doctor beat a' Kastyj.retreat, drew, back his chair: from itsTdanger'"iis proximity, caught up his hat,, and, :n ; tones of blighted- .hope, gasped forth his declaration in'these, words, "Kh ! -dear! ~cS< w'ell-i, I'ni sure! The thing wanting .is^-aSa^ideboard." However, shemarried him after all.