The Young Men of the Day.

New Zealand Mail, Issue 816, 21 October 1887, Page 4

The Young Men of the Day.

Saturday Review,, It is the way of young men-to hold them" selves in high estimation, and think themselves of vast their estimation of themselves being possibly higher than other people’s. Thi- self-appreciation has, perhaps, been increased in the present day by the value that has been placed upon them as dancing machines, it being as much a necessity to have plenty of dancing men at a ball as it is to have a good Bupper and an ample supply of waiters. In their anxiety to secure a sufficiency of the male sex to adorn their entertainments, many ladies in society have, like gardeners, produced a forced exotic that has arrived at a premature growth ; and young men, as they call themselves, are nothing more than boys. These beardless youths on finding that they are sought after, attribute it to their own par. tioular merits, and not to the fact that they are useful'for dancing purposes, and accordingly begin to put on a,' lot of side/ and try to make the world believe they are extremely rOpandus and valuable; and, after two or three years of this kind of life, they think it right to give out that they are blasts of the Innocent amusements that society is willing to provide them with. Then comes the s age in which hardly anything is ‘good enough while society of the harmless type is a bore and ‘not worth the trouble, don’t you know,’ in their own phraseology. Nothing that is not of the most perfect kind is worthy of their acceptance ; they must have the best food and wine, be only asked to meet the ‘ smart set ’ in society, which includes all the pretty young married women ; while at country honses they expect first class shooting ; nor are they sparing in their condemnation of a host who gives them the best he has, if it does not happen quite to come up to their exalted ideas. The amusing part of this is that many of these spoiled darlings in society are endowed with but small allowances from their.parents, and but for the generous hospitality extended to them they would have to live upon the plainest and simplest fare if they kept within their means. It sounds most grotesque to hear them abus ing the good things they are enjoying at the expense of others, knowing at the time as they do that, if catering for themselves, they would be unable to enjoy any such luxuries. Many young men get their heads completely turned when they first appear in London society by being taken up and petted by pretty woman because they are goodlooking, smart, and amusing ; and they then get the idea that their life is to be one long career of successes, and that any pretty woman on whom they may care to lavish that valuable article which they are pleased to call their affections must necessarily fall a victim to the impassioned devotions of such magnificent and perfect creatures as themselves. As these men grow older, so does their selfishness and egotism increase, and they soon come to that state of mind in which they think it is the right and proper thing to try and lead from the straight path any pretty young married women whom they admire, and who, they think, would add to the dignity and importance of their own valuable selves by having their name coupled with them. And at the present time, if a young man does succeed in his nefarious designs of getting a lady’s name coupled with his own, his want of chivalry prevents him from trying to hide the association as much as possible, and his miserable vanity impels him to accept the imputation blandly and with great contentment and pleasure, as it adds, in his opinion, to his value iu the eyes of the world. No idea of generosity or manliness seems to stir up his conscience to the treachery and cowardioe he is displaying to the woman who, whether the world’s inferences are correct or not, has sacrificed her good name by her foolish fancy for him. What does it matter to such a miserable picture of vanity that a lady’s fair fame is taken away by the scandalous tongues of society, if only he feels that in the eyes of his fellow-men he has been accredited with a success which makes him an object of envy and respect to his companions that are of the same way of thinkiug as himself on such subjects ? He is thought much more of by his friends if he can score, or at least have scored to him, several such so-called ‘ successes ’ with ladies; while any man who openly and with manly courage avows that he would scorn to take advantage of any lady’s indiscretions would in this age be laughed at as a * flat ’ and a fool in not availing himself of the opportunities that are thrown in his way. But by far the lowest state to which young men have now fallen is the habit, unfortunately very common, of allowing by implication that they are on more than friendly terms with a lady. This is greatly attributable to the fact, which we have noticed before, that men now have not the slightest scruple in talking about women in clubs and public places in a way that they ought to be ashamed of ; and the next step down the hill of degradation is for them to imply by hints and looks that they are the heroes of successes, and to glory in the fact of being * chaffed ’ about a lady, instead of giving it to be plainly understood that any further allusions will bo followed by disagreeable results. Many of these young men would be much improved by the rough and ready handling meted out to schoolboys when

they outrageously violate public opinion in their small world. Many of them have not the tact to know where to stop, and finding a pleasant, agreeable, and pretty woman, wlio is fond of harmless fun, think there is an opening for taking liberties, and lay theixu selves open to a most severe snubbing, which should crush them for some time, and give them a wholesome lesson as to the proper respeot that should be shown to ladies. But, we are sorry to have to admit it, the pachydermatous condition of such as these enables their overweening self-appreciation and vanity to overcome their mortification, and they soon resume their former course, taking extreme care to hide their discomfiture, being much ashamed of that, though not of the cause of it—namely, their own ungentlemanlike behavior. Of course the excuse is that the women lead them on, which may be true ; but a man is none the less bound to act like a gentleman if a woman is weak and fallible. Gambling and racing are great stumbling blocks in a young man’s career now. Many men think that they can increase their limited income by a recourse to these pursuits ; and how many poor young fellows have disappeared from the ken of men through this unhappy belief! Luck very often attends these, when they are feeling their way, with comparatively small stakes ; but it is like the Will-o’-the-wisp, which is pretty sure to lead them to their destruction if they have only the moral courage to ‘ take a pull ’ when they are getting out of their depth. It only wants a study of the betting-ring to assure men of common-sense that backing horses iu the long run means coming to grief; the ring in creases daily in numbers and prosperity, none of the old faces disappear except by death, while new ones are continually joining Tattersall’s and apparently prospering, so it must be obvious that they are doing well and making money—but how ? at the expense of the backer. But the numbers of men who have taken to racing and have suecumbed, is enormous, whilst those that have made anything by it> could be counted on the fingers of one hand. The same may be said of gambling, with this additional disadvantage, or we might say disgrace, that when young men play, as they frequently do, for higher stakes than they can afford to do, and losing are unable to pay, it is their friends and acquaintances who are ‘ let in ’ by them, who have the disagreeable choice of whether to post their quondam allies or silently suffer the loss. It seems a mistake now that the only penalty that can be imposed oa a man for wilfully playing for higher stakes than he can afford, and then not paying his friends if he loses, is to turn him out of his club ; it strikes us as a worse crime than the stealing of a loaf of bread by a poor starving wretch, who if he is caught, ‘get3 ’ two mouths.