SAYING

New Zealand Herald, Volume LXXVII, Issue 23761, 14 September 1940, Page 2 (Supplement)

SAYING

Named riOLF professional: "Now there's one thing I must impress on you—always keep your eye on the ball." Novice (coldly): "Oh. so that's the Bort of club I've joined." —Justicfa. Secret Weapon? .. TVHE Italians have evolved a new giant aeroplane. This carries a crew of 15. divided as follows: Captain and first pilot, second pilot and navigator, radio operator and mechanic, rear gunner, parachutist, and 10 professional strong men. Ttieir function is to push the parachutist out. —The Daily Telegraph, London.' Rebel rpHE Countess of Oxford and Asquitli hated lessons as a child mainly because her tutors did not like her original, inquiring mind. "But surely when I don't understand, I should be allowed to ask the meaning of what you are teaching?" she said to one governess. "That's enough!" the governess retorted, sharply. "If others can understand me, 4 why can't you?" To which strong-minded little Margot replied: "How do you know they understand? I doilbt if they are even listening to you!" „ —Tit-Bds, London.

Summex Fiction This is a terrible way to start our vacation trip, but I'm afraid we'll have to turn back. I just happened to think that I forgot to lock the back door!"

"That's all right, honey. Don't feel bad about it. After all. it's only a hundred and eighty-six miles." —Chefc Johnson, in The Saturday Evening Post. .

"That is the end of the news II" ■ r —Dublin Opinion Yorkshire Spirit TpROM Yorkshire comes this story of a woman who is over 70. Someone found her busy gardening, and in her apron pocket was a letter. "It's from Mary, said she. "She wants me to go to "Australia. She says it will be safer out there, and she offers to pay my fare." "Excellent," said <her neighbour, "and when do you sail?" "Who said I was sailing? Who wants to be safe? As long as there's a bairn to care for or a bed to make or a head to bandage, I'm staying in Yorkshire 1" —Children's Newspaper, London.