THE WOMAN'S WORLD.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XL, Issue 12269, 13 May 1903, Page 2 (Supplement)

THE WOMAN'S WORLD.

A GUIDE FOR THE ENGAGED.

Ofixioks on the subject of marrying one's first love are much divided, and one has rather to beg the question by saying that it is mainly a matter of temperament. The age at which men begin falling in love has also to be taken into account. A modern writer gives it as his opinion that a wise man will never marry his first love, for he knows that matrimony demands as much special attention as any of the learned professions. Unqualified amateurs swell the lists of the divorce court. The subject has also been considered by Mrs., Miss, or Mr. G. R. M. Devereux (the sex of the author is not revealed) in. a little book entitled " The Etiquette of Engagement and Marriage,", published by 0. Arthur Pearson and Co. " But supposing the heart-searckings of the lover afflicted with the tender passion reveal its genuineness to be guinea-gold, what is he to do ? Obtain an introduction first of all, of course, to the object of his adoration. And secondly ? Let the oracle speak: " Once the introduction is over' it remains mainly with the man to make the most of his advantages. He obtains permission to call; and it is not a bad plan to allow a short interval to elapse before availing himself of the privileges. He must not seem neglectful, but may wait just long enough to give the lady time to think about him, to wonder, to wish, to long for his coming. He will be careful not to transgress any detail of etiquette in this his first call, but he will not leave without having made some distinct advance, having found some pretext for a less formal visit. He will convey to her in a subtle, meaning manner that the sun will not shine for him till he sees her again." Having ingratiated himself so far with the lady as to feel sure of her favour, or made certain of it by a proposal, the suitor must interview the stern parent. " He should state plainly what his income and prospects are, the probable date at which he will be able to marry, and how he proposes to provide for his wife. He must not resent being somewhat closely questioned before his reception into a family, and should be ready to give all particulars respecting himself that may be required. Parents who value their daughter do right to exercise wise forethought before entrusting her to a comparative stranger. He should carefully avoid any unseemly curiosity as to the marriage portion. " The generously-disposed young man is always wondering how he can send presents to the young woman he admires without overstepping the boundaries of strict etiquette. He pants to prove his devotion by forwarding Persian kittens, bon-bons, bangles, and other nice things to his best and second best beloveds. May he ? Under certain conditions, yes. But let him remember that' a line must be carefully drawn between the gifts of an unconfesse'd lover and of a fiance. The former may send flowers, bon-bons, and prettv trifles of that sort, or he could give her a dog or a Persian kitten; but he must not offer her articles of jewellery or any item of her toilette. He might give; her the undressed skin of aji animal that he had shot, but he could not order a set of furs to be sent to her from a shop. It must be remembered that ostensibly they are-as yet only friends, and though every gift will have its inward meaning, it should not have any outward significance.' "In offering a present the unconfessed lover will do well to enclose a little note couched in some such terms as these :

" Dear Miss Grayson,—You said the other day that you could not grow lilies of the valley in your garden, so I am venturing to send you the accompanying basket, which I hope you will be kind "enough to accept.— Believe me, sincerely yours, "Duncan Talbot."

Is it necessary to start the rounds of applause that will be accorded to Duncan Talbot's strategy ? Scarcely. Every lover will acknowledge him to be a master of tact, and will wish him well in Miss Grayson's regard. THE COLD "TUB." There is no more dangerous fallacy than the belief that cold baths all the year round are good for everybody. The truth is that they suit comparatively few people in cold weather. Those who enjoy them are, of course, enthusiastic about their beneficial effects, and they convert many people to their views who should not dream of taking a cold bath, except during warm summer weather. The immediate effect of a cold bath in winter is injurious. It lowers the temperature of the body. This makes it necessary for the body to put forth a great effort to warm itself. If the body be robust, it succeeds; if not, it doesn't. And if it doesn't succeed, then the resulting injury is very serious. No one who feels chilly for a quarter of an hour after the bath should take one. Neither should anyone who has a weak heart, or is at all out of sorts. And even when the bath can be taken without injury, great care should be used to avoid draughts ; dressing should be accomplished with haste, and exercise taken as soon' as possible. IP YOU WANT TO BE LOVED. Don't find fault. Don't contradict people, even if you are sure you are right. Don't be inquisitive about the affairs of even your most intimate friends. Don't underrate anything because you don't possess it. Don't believe that everybody else in the world is happier than you. Don't believe all the evil you hear. Don't repeat gossip, even* if it does interest a crowd.

Don't go untidy on the plea that everybody knows you. Don't be rude to your inferiors in social position. Don't express a positive opinion unless you perfectly understand what you are talking about. Don't get into the habit of vulgarising life by making light of the sentiment "of it. ' ' -......-

Don't over or under dress.

Don't try to be anything else but a gentlewoman—and that means a woman who has consideration for the whole world, and whose life is governed by the golden rule: "Do unto others'as you would be done by."

THE TABLE. Rhubarb is seldom made as much use of as it might be. As a fruit (though it is really a vegetable) it is only really nice when young and tender. After a month or two, the stringiness becomes unpleasant, and then it should be treated to a different wav of cooking. The following is a palatable and useful way of serving it, especially for children, when a cold sweet is required. Rhubarb Mould: Take one quart of young red rhubarb, cut it in very short pieces, and boil it to a mash. Dissolve half-au-ounce of gelatine in hot water; when quite melted, add lib of white powdered sugar. Boil this with the rhubarb, adding essence of lemon to taste. Pour it into a mould, and when cold turn out, and serve _ with custard, or whipped cream. This is best made the day before it is required, to ensure its being quite firm. If desired to be a more refined dish, strain the rhubarb into a mould through a hair-sieve, to prevent the stringy particles from going through. There'' are also various ways of making rhubarb jam, which are equally nice, and they are plain and wholesome for children. The 'following will be found useful:—Cut up 31b of rhubarb about one inch long. Cut lib of mixed ' candied peel as much as possible into small squares. Tie £lb of crushed ginger loosely in a piece of muslin, and put the whole "with 61b of loaf sugar into a preserving-pan. Let it come slowly to boil, then keep it boiling for an hour. Take out the ginger before potting. Cover down hob with, double

papers. Another way is to. peel some rhubarb and cut it into thin pieces till you have a qiiart, then have six oranges very carefully peeled, and the pips removed. Slice them thinly into a preserving pan, add the outside pee] grated, or cut into very thin strips, and I.lb of loaf sugar pounded- Add the rhubarb (which, if old and tough, should be stewed previously for a-quarter of an hour before adding it to the oranges), and boil, stirring and skimming constantly till done, which takes from three-quarters of an hour to an hour. It is best to boiJ the orange peel separately first if cut intq strips, as it is otherwise! apt ta vU&jriaAs