LOCAL GOSSIP.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXI, Issue 7164, 1 November 1884, Page 1 (Supplement)

LOCAL GOSSIP.

" Let me have audience fot a word or two." — Shakspere. A black eye is not an.uncommon spectacle in the streets of Auckland ; and we are all familiar with the current run of excuses, which it is quite impolitic ever to throw a doubt upon. But those who assembled at a Congregational soiree the other evening experienced a novel sensation when the clergyman presiding introduced a brother clergyman as a speaker who was adorned with a most conspicuous black eye. The reason in this case was that a cricket ball had jumped up and hit him, and, according to the rules of courtesy in such eases, it was allowed to pass. The fashionable excuse once was that, in chopping firewood, a piece had jumped up. But very few now do any chopping of firewood, so that the old excuse is getting too thin. However, the cricket ball is always available for those who play, or even for all who may occasionally visit the Domain on a Saturday afternoon.

A story is current; showing the danger of indiscriminate charity. A well-known charitable medical gentleman was accosted by a. young maa who said that he had no money, and was in a state of destitution. A halfsovereign was given. Shortly afterwards the charitable donor was going down the wharf and saw the man he had given the half-sovereign to bargaining with Mr. Williams, the fishmonger, for fresh salmon (which had come in ice by the mail steamer) at 5s per pound. Horrified at this, the philanthropist went into the shop, and said, " I think you might have spout the money I gave you rather on bread and beef than salmon." The other man looked quite indignant, as he exclaimed, " I can't have salmon when I have no money, and now that I have the money to buy it, you say I ought not to have it. When, in the name of all that's just, am I to have. 3almon?"

I notice that at the meeting of the City Fathers on Thursday night complainte were made regarding the rough and ready manner in which the dust-cart men handle the boxes which they are required to empty, and generally perform their necessary but unsesthetical duties. Some time ago I drew attention to this matter, and I am now glad to find that the Council is alive to its duty in respect of it, and that the contractor is to receive an official communique on the subject. No one is so unreasonable as to expect that the men should handle the boxes as though they were made of the most exquisite porcelain, and filled with the most precious perfumes of Araby, bat it is only fair to ask them to treat them if not tenderly at least with care, and not to knock them about with a bang and a clang and a ring, ting, tang, as though the business of life was to smash and pulverise them.

I see that your Wellington correspondent says that the provision about working on Sunday has caused a flutter in the offices of the morning newspapers. I don't know how you have felt, but, at all events, you may be relieved now. The working mtut be in the public view—in fact, the House of .Representatives in this matter goes upon what Mr. Bracken has declared to be a cherished national maxim in Scotland, and that is, " Behave yersels afore folk." The editor may be pondering his next day's leader when listening to an orthodox discourse, and shaping out its phraseology ; but who can tell that ? Perhape, too, aftv all, there aro many in the church who meditating meaner and worse things. Supposing the window of his sanctum to be lit up at the time of evening service, the constable who is seeing to the due observance of the Police Offencoa Statute, cannot toll but that be may be reading his Bible. Very little public scandal can be caused by the work which the Monday's publication of a newspaper involves. But T invoke any amount of publio pity and commiseration for those unfortunates who have to forego the rest and repose of the day. I notice, however, tbat when the Bill was in the Legislative Council, on Thursday, the Eon. Mr. Beeves, of the Lyttelton Times, was tbe means of inserting a proviso, so that the police should not be able to interfere with any of his employes in any oircumstances when pursuing their usual avocations on a Sunday.

It is rather disheartening to see the way in which the Auckland Institute approaohes the discussion of scientific questions. The other evening a paper on " Spiders" came up for discussion, which had been forwarded by a local scientist, and it was resolved " that the paper be taken as read," the minds of members being in a too cobwebby condition to understand and appreciate it. Surely Mr. Ewington, as a lay-reader, might have thrown a little light on the matter, and informed members, on tbe highest authority,

that "the spider taketh h6ld j with her hands, and is in king's palacee, and also contributed the historical incident about the Bruce and the spider, which, would have relieved the somnolency of the meeting. At the . Salvation Army "saved demonstration" of drunkards, " Jimmy defined a " spider" as brandy and ginger beer. That's the sort of "spider," I fancy, the Anckland Institute is always ready to discusa. -

A mild excitement prevails at OhJnemutu and at Te Aroha looking forward to the end of the session. It has been reported that, r when he has no longer the House of Representatives to face, Sir Julius Vogel will seek the healing waters of Kotorua and Rotomahana to remove his gout and rheumatism. There is a hot spring also at Te Aroha, and, as that is somewhat dull »3 to gold mining, it is thought that good might be done to it by a vieit of Sir Julius to the healing waters. We hope the Treasurer will, for his own sake, visit both places, but we cannot help calling to mind that one time he remained a year in Europe in order that he might visit the springs of Germany, and that, moreover, the colony had to pay the expenses of the trip. Tho Syrian general wanted to know if the rivers of Damascus were not better than the Jordan, which was enjoined by the prophet. Sir Julius had not the reason which operated in that case, and we think it was too bad of him to flee to the German spas when we have springe which far surpass them in virtue. Perhaps it was because the German spas have attractions about them which as yet Rotorua has not. "We must just live in hope to see gambling and gaiety introduced there in the same measure as at Baden Baden.

I But why did not the Colonial Treasurer and. the Premier apply to Mr. Milner Stephen, who is healing by miraculous power scores of insignificant people, who, compared with Sir Julius and Mr. Stout, are of no consequence whatever J All the frequent explosions of irritability which we have had lately from the Ministry are owing to gout, and the country has a right to see that any means is adopted to have these men in high positions healed. Why did not Mr. Milner Stephen, "the Healer," go to Wellington and insist upon operating. He saya that his healing power extends to a distance of fourteen feet from his person. Why did he not cure Sir Julius and Mr. Stout even against their will. But, is faith an item in the transaction ? because, if it ia, I am afraid there is no chance of doing any good. Sir Julius, I should think, is destitute of religious faith, and could not listen with patience to Mr. Milner Stephen when oiting a text of tho New Testament as his authorities. As for Mr. Stout, we all know that he has no faith whatever. But Mr. Stephen ought to try, and at once. Auckland can do without the healer for a week or two longer, if he will go to Wellington, and relieve us from a gouty, and, in consequence, an irritable, querulous, 'arrogant, and blundering Ministry.

We have heard of late a vast amount about Vera Foster. "Whoever he was, or is, he figures as an incubus on the teachers and the ingenuous youth of tbis province. I bad read and heard so. much about him, that long ago I had determined to investigate his claims, because I suspected that the vast majority of my readers have, like myself, left their school days a long way behind them. If in their school day times they suffered a few birchinge, it was not for neglecting Vere Foster. He was not then dreamt of. A recent occurrence determined mo to start my investigation at once. A very small boy, attending one of the public schools, was writing his letters, when bis mother thought that the capital "B" might be improved, and wrote one as a copy. "But," sobbed the child, " that's not a Vere Foster'B,'" and he fairly cried at the insult offered to the deity of the public schools. Now, I claim to be a great authority on this subject of handwriting. I have been practically investigating it ever since I was a boy, and I think I know more about it than any other person. The first principle is, that as all writing is for tho purpose of being read, it should be legible. That may be thought to be a mere truism, but it is a fact that it is very often forgotten. Next, writing should be of such a nature that it can be swiftly written. Writing is a slow process at the best, and it should never be of a kind which tends to lose time. From these two principles a number of important practical rules follow. I had long ago settled in my mind that no writer should attempt thick and thin strokes. The beauty of writing should consist solely in the symmetrical form of the letters. To introduce thick and thin strokes is to attempt to import colour. When a boy is taught to make thick and thin strokes, he must of necessity abandon the practice when he begins to write beyond a mere painting process, but he will of necessity writebadly. To this thick and thin stroke system 1 attribute the fact that most teachers write big, sprawly, blotchy hands, unhandsome to look at, and which cannot be written quickly. I will not mention any cases in point, which I might do. Next, there must be no attempt in writing to make extra flourishes for the sake of adornment. That, again, is simply painting, not writing. Flourishes may be introduced when the handwriting is slow and elaborate, but when the writing has to be done at even moderate speed, they become ugly excrescences. Teachers should be careful not to attempt to teach either thick and thin strokes or flourishes. Another rule, is, that all writing to be legible must be open and clear.

All these things were on my mind when I got several copy-books of different systems and compared them. I had never looked at them beiore, and I was eurprisod to find that Vere Foster came very near my ideal, and that the others, although presenting handsome copy-lines, were utterly impossible to be brought to everyday rapid writing. Seeing, therefore, that Vere Jb'oster accorded with what, from the daily experience and reflection of a lifetime I know to be correct, I say to all Boards of Education, school committees, and teachers, '' Cease your opposition to it; it is right and true. It is indeed the only true syatem on which handwriting can be taught. You can take my word for it, as I have far more experience that you can have,"

I know, of course, that there must be an infinite diversity in capacities of writing. Some men, from the muscular and nervous formation of their hands, will never make good writers. In competitions all allowance must be made for this. But I eay that the best system should be adopted for teaching by, and that unquestionably is Yere Foster.

As a rale, teachers are bad writers, They have learned from bad models. No man can be a rapid writer unless he is a good and plain writer. Some of the best writers I have known are in the reporting profession. As a rule, telegraphists do not write so well as they should do. But there is one now at the Auckland office whose writing is about perfection in all respects. If I were on the Board of Education, I would move to get a sheet of his manuscript and to have it sent round to every teacher in the district, with instructions that that was to be the model. Although written rapidly, and in manifold, it has every good characteristic that writing should have. Let the Board of Education have a look at it. It is a practical example, far surpassing Vere Foster's set lines in value.

Remenyi, who dabs himself "a fiddler and somewhat of a thinker," intends giving a number of performances in Auckland, on the termination of hie Australian tour. He is admitted to bo the greatest violinist of the age. He undoubtedly believes himself to be so, and that, of course, is a great deal. But Remenyi ia not a bad sort of fellow, as fiddlers go. He is an excellent talker, and withal most entertaining. There is no fear of his ever being voted » bore, as Macaulay was, or of sending his listeners to sleep, as Coleridge sometimes did. Those who know him, describe him as "an original character." The other day I was looking at his carte-de-visite, and on the back of it I fornd that he written the following :—"To Mr. G. W. Gri33n, Consul by accident, thinker by birth, litterateur by vocation, and man by will." This is original enough to please anybody.

Francis Liszt, in his work on the "Gipsies, and their Music in Hungary," thus refers to fiemeayi : — " White the time seems to be near at hand when the national character of the different schools shall disappear, snd Bohemian music become a thing of the past, I have met with lively satisfaction a young Hungarian who has retained sufficient individuality and spontaneousness to warrant that he will be written of some day in the same strain as Csermak. Remenyi, although not a Romany, has become imbued with Bohemian feeling and art. Spite of the applause with which he haa invariablj been greeted, he appears toj be one of the

few artiste who have a higher object than to make themselves a name by which to amass a fortune. He is never done with progress, but keeps on steadily towards a supreme ideal. He is gifted with a vivacious, generous, and rather mocking disposition, which rebels against monotony, and whose originality shines through.' everything, and in spite of everything."

A lighr-heeled Meronry, who " wants to know, yon know," sends the following note : —" Dear Mercutio, —AJs I notice yon seem to take an interest in Hospital matters, could you kindly inform me : 1. Is it true that some of the Hospital ward female nurses may be seen out on the Kyber Pass on & weekday, taking ' airings' on horseback, and attending Professor .Hazell's riding classes, to learn the mysteries of equitation ? 2. Is it true that a select dance, or dancing class, has been established once a week, from eight p.m. to ten p.m., in the Hospital operating theatre, over the convalescent patients' ward?"

My correspondent wants to know too much. If such a state of things exists as is implied by the queries j propounded, then it goes far to show that the Hospital has been erected less for the benefit of the patients than the staff. Formerly, 120 to 130 beds were made up in the institution, now there are only about 90, and patients, it is stated, are lying on the floor, the balance of the accommodation being absorbed by the staff. There is a silent eloquence about this little. fact which tells its own tale. Lessons in equitation are certainly admirably adapted to fit these young ladies to play the r6le of the " pretty horsebreaker," on the Ladies' Mile, but they must form a poor preparative training for watching beside the fevered couch or at the bed of the dying. As to a dance, or dancing class, over the convalescent patients' ward, if anything could " resuscitate " patients of any class, it would be lively proceedings of that character, super-added to the strumming of a piano from the reveille to tatoo.

The Mayor and one or two of the reforming members of the Hospital Committee inwardly groan in spirit over the "bloated" regime which has set in, and look back regretfully for a return, in some measure, to the Spartan simplioity which once prevailed, but as each member of the committee is afraid to " bell the cat," matters are allowed to "elide." Some people incredulously remark, on hearing current gossip, " But what does the committee think ?" It matters very little what the committeo think, as the institution is fast slipping from their control, and out of hand. ihey are dropping down to and accepting their new position, namely, that of supernumerary clerks to oheck the "accounts, and act as'"buffers" between, the Government and the public. It is of much more consequence to know what the patients and ex-patients think, and their criticisms are of a very mixed and emphatic character, "which their langwidge is ' frequent. , "

The happiest repartee, and best speoimen of parliamentary wit that has yet been interchanged in the local Parliamentary Union occurred at last sitting. It arose in this way :—The Government endeavoured to force on the second reading of the Waste Lands Bill, notwithstanding that it had been insufficiently circulated, and consequently the Opposition were not prepared to discuss its provisions. The Attorney-General (Mr Milligan Hogg) thereupon plaintively enquired " why the Opposition would not take the Government Sills 'at sight!'" Instantly, like a clap of thunder out of a clear.sky, came a ohorus of yells from the Opposition benches, "Take the Government Bills 'at eigat ?' Why the names at the back ofthem are not good enough I" It daivned upon the Attorney-General that he was suffering from an "optical delusion," and he simply collapsed on the Ministerial.bench, a huddled' mass of broadcloth, shirt-front, and paper collar, under the profound conviotion that he had been struck "at eight" by a piledriver. Mjbrcutio,