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New Zealand Herald, Volume I, Issue 3, 18 November 1863, Page 3

The Divorce Court is going on admirably and the Argus very soon will have to de\ ole a space to immarriages as well as marriages immediately alter the births and deaths. In a few years any woman who has been the wile of only one live husband will be looked upon as n poor spiritless creature, and any child who can comply with the divine command, and honor both father and mother, will be a curiosity. When you ask a. lady after her family, she will naturally inquire to which of her families you refer; and when you imprudently interrogate a young gentleman as to the health of his father or mother, as the ct-st may be, he will have to tell you, with a frown t hat he has not the least idea. Half-brothers and sisters will have to be introduced to each other when they meet in society, and daughters will have their juvenile morals improoved by seeing their mammas going homewithiiewhusbands, and their papas pairing off with new wives. In cases of reconciliation, the late Mrs. Xomkins will be seen waltzing round the room with her quondam husband the existing Mrs. Tomkins consoling herself the while by innocently flirting on her part with a prospective spouse. Girls and their unmarried mammas will be making love in competition to the same person, and young men will be calling out divorced fathers for daring to interfere with their pretentions to some maiden hand. A single woman will no longer be describable as an unmarried woman—that title being reserved for ladies who have enjoyed, and resigned or been deprived of, the blessings of matrimonial lile. l'or, " till death do us part, young couples will have to read " till divorce " and (here will be no permanent marriage, except for the most commonplace of people. Naughty wives will provoke their husbands till they get clieir faces slapped, and then complain of cruelty ; naughty husbands will put their wives in equivocal positions, and then complain of something worse. A race of divorce detectives will come into existence, who will prove anything you like about your wife or husband as the ease may bo ; and none of us will need to continue married an hour longer than we please, A charming prospect for all married folk, but a strange state of society for their children ; and very cor.fu: Mg as regards pedigrees withal. —Melbourne Punch, OuxrrnoLOOicAt,. —A celebrated bird-tamer having succeeded in making a canary (who was, by thewwa t breil up with a. perch in his cage) clean his master s boots, and even when he was dismally moulting »>"£ mol/o virace, has dismissed his ioofmen and tang iritis fowls to supply their piaecs. Two (oivis, callea a hem or lien, as the case maybe, have given up lavin" eggs, and are now of great service m la\ mg cloths for dinner, luncheon, find other meals, ■ London Punch,