Entre Nows.

Free Lance, Volume XVI, Issue 839, 28 July 1916, Page 10

Entre Nows.

RIGHT from the beginning of the. war we have been fed up by the German Lie Bureau witli yarns of mysterious craft and destructive war machines that the Huns allegedly have had under construction by which to blow the verdommed British (Gott strafe them!) clean- out of creation. "Very few of these strange vessels, etc., have materialised. It is, however, quite a change and very refreshing to read amongst last Monday's cables one item from London which stated that a special correspondent, who had visited the British munitions factories, shipbuilding yards, and naval bases, had witnessed the construction of warships of dimensions, speed, and gun power which couldl not be hinted at, besides a mysterious vessel hidden by canvas screens. * - * * * A propos of this "mysterious vessel hidden-by canvas screens'' from the outside worid, we read in a recent New York paper a report from its London Correspondent which possibly refers to the same identical craft. This correspondent writes that in British waters there now floats a certain ship which embodies many novel features of extreme importance." So carefully were these secrets guarded while she was "being built that the vessel, while on the stocks and during the period of her equipment, was known by all working upon her as H.M.S. Hush. Then came her launching, when she was christened H.M.S. Rampageous. (This, by the way, is not her real name in the navy list —the censor might have objected to the publication of her real name.) Now, after she has been the cynosure of all British naval eyes for some time, her novel characteristics are found so startling that she is commonly referred to by the navy men as H.M.S. Outrageous. * * » * They must have been having a long drought in Egypt. A certain nurse, attached to one of the military hospitals -in the Land of the Sphinx, states in a recent letter that she had bathed luxuriously with a jam- tin full of soup water!

"She is outside the pale of society, 5 ' remarked Mrs. Snobson-Streete-, when the doings of a once supposedly dear friend of hers had come up for discussion. And, struck by what was, to her, a novel phrase, an inquisitive little niece rashly interrupted the conversation of her elders. "The pale of society!" she prattled, pertly. "I s'pese, auntie, they are those who don't put any red on!" * * * * A aolf ba'il which was lost at Heretaunga by a certain player was found a while ago in a. nest in which were several young birds. The fledglings were "uninjured. Probably ill ey were too young to feel the force- o£ the golfer's remarks and comments. •* * * . * It is quite on the cards that the Prince of Wales will now pay a short visit to the Russian front. If the visit oomes off it is pretty certain to be kept a strict secret until afterwards in view of the disaster to Lord Kitchener. And it may end in an engagement at Petrograd. * * * » In one of the street encounters during the Irish revolt in Dublin a rebel and a soldier rushed at one another. The soldier was a Dublin man, who had been drafted to lis native city to help to quell the rising. As he looked at his foe he recognised his brother. "My God, Tom, is this where I find you ?" he said. "Run for your life." * The brother turned and fled.

As all -the world krlows, not even the horrible plague of flies could damp the spirits of the men who fought so gallantlly at Gallipoli. For all that, it was not in human nature to forbear grumbling. But even the flics couldn't overwhelm the good humour of a certain N.C.0., '/a rale broth of a blioy." He had been, silently and sorrowfully watching his men masticating a multitude of flies with . every mouthful and cursing the subjects of Beelzebub as they did so. At last, he was moved to rebuke them. "Ye don't seem to .know," he observed, scathingly, "when you're well off. ye spalpeens. Be thankful 'tis no worse. How would ye be feelin' if thim flies had bones in them?" • • * "It is as certain as anything can be in war that within three or six months after the capture of Lille, Germany will have been completely defeated" —such is the prophecy of a prominent English war-writer. It is a pretty confident tip, and as Lille hasn't been captured as yet were are to assume then that we are still several months off the end. Lille evidently is a position of great strategic importance. * ■ * ■ * » Another Birdwood story testifying to the popularity of the Commander of the Anzacs. One day when water was short as usual at Anzac, General Birdwood," passing a- man who was trying to wash in his teacup allowance of it, remarked encouragingly, "Having a good clean-

up?'* "Yes, general," was the reply, "and I only wisli I was a ruddy canary!" The examining medical officer was real busy at the recruiting station when a ship's fireman waltzed into the room.- ' "Wber« axe your papers?" asked the doctor. The papers were produced, "Oh, all right; go out and strip off, and then I'll have a look at you.". The recruit came, back in a few minutes. - "What was the name of your last ship? Have you got your discharge?" "Gorb]ime, wot abaht me dischawgej I come 'ere to 'list, not to be thrown off at," retorted the recruit, whose language suggested he was horn very close to the' East End of . London. The examination proceeded fairly smoothly, amid curt questions from the doctor and resentful replies from the recruit, until the tape was passed round the latter's chest. "Exhale," said the, doctor., "Wot?" "Do this," and the doctor proceeded to give an object lesson on chest expansion for the recruit's benefit, but his effort was not appreciated, for the Cockney, in a tone of deep resentment, said, "'Ere, I come in to. enlist, not to giv~e a physical culture exhibition/' » * * * Many a true word spoken in jesteven by a Chinaman. A fair but shrewd collector appealed to John when he ar- , rived with the vegetables for a contribution to the Red Cross or some other patriotic fund. "Come on," she said persuasively, "you look like Emperor of