IT IS TOWN TALK

Free Lance, Volume XV, Issue 798, 15 October 1915, Page 26

IT IS TOWN TALK

—That,- as winter approaches in Gallipoli, it will be hard at Sari—Bair. —That many Wellingtonians who got 1 (hemmed in the crowd last Saturday also got a stitch in the side. —That as Germany is building more (warships, it is believed another aquatic museum besides the Kiel will have to be built. ; ' —That a New Zealand force may yet be landed at Macedonia. If so, we suggest that the smallest state, should be , re-named Masseydonia. i —That a recent French infantry charge in the Champagne district 5s likened to that of a- pack of hounds-in full cry. After the Herrs! —That a good many people have got the notion that'" the man who devotes himself to the business of organising carnivals' is l on< a good wicket.. —That the parsons who are so busy at present throwing bricks at these Carnival gambles should remember that many a respectable man is married in a church. —That there is a dreadful shortage of shearers in the Dominion. Our goldtoothed "wool-brokers," however, hope to continue fleecing operations withoutgreat loss. , — I That one of our very nicest clergymen is understood to have refused to marry a young couple., on the assumption that marriage is a lottery, even though it is a heart union. —That Trentham Camp since its renovation is most complete—even to engagement and ( Wedding rings and a whole army of parsons ready on the spot v to tie the nuptial knot. —r-That an ingenious wag _ advises those who' find the high cost of living beyond their means to fold every pound note before they put it in their nocket. And then, when they take it out, they ■will find it in creases. —-That' it is not safe to mention next-of-kin passes to thousands of relatives of those gallant soldier-lads who marched out the other day. Likewise, New Zealand's War Office is hot accepting any thanks for the issue of the same. —That it would' be interesting to know exactly how many German firms are still allowed to sell their Made-in-Sehermany goods in New Zealand. One with its headquarters for the Dominion in Wellington was recently "outed" in Australia. —That the Earl of Liverpool's Own were not only distinguishable last Saturday by the black diamonds and the black squares on their caps. Some cif them also had bald patches to correspond specially cut out on the crown of their heads. —That the Chinese fruiterers' shops in Wellington herald the approach of the Fifth of November with the usual of fireworks. But the only Guy Fawkes that New Zealand has a mind to burn just now happens to be at large still in Potsdam. —That the public? ought to know how many local -and well-to-do Germans are at large in this and other cities of New Zealand when they ought to be safely interned on Somes Island, like the common or merely garden variety of German who is kept there. —That the members of the 'Ouse got awfully polite to each other in the dying hours; of the session. For instance, take these sample bouquets : From Mr. Hind.marsh to "my hon. friend, Mr. Ell, the Duke of Christchurch." From Mr. Ell to Mr. Hindmarsh: "My hon. friend, Lord Tom Noddy." —That in the opinion of Mr. George Elliott (chairman of the ; Auckland Carnival organisation), the financial shirker in this war is ten thousand times worse than the military shirker. "There are firms in Auckland," he said, "who have made enormous profits out of the war. Some have given some of their profits, some have given none." , —That the Fkee Lance was amongst the veiry first to reach the firing-line. A soldier-correspondent writes from Anzac stating that New Zealand's gallant lads prefer it to all other papers, and eagerly look out for it. He also says he has seen hundreds of' it right up in the front trenches, and has also come across it in captured Turkish trenches. We, however, stoutly deny any imputation that we have been trading with the enemy. The Turks are welcome to any bouquets for them they may find in the pages of the"New Zealand Free Lance."

—That, like German sausage and Turkish delight, there is now a decided slump in the market for Bulgarian rock. —That an octopus was caught- in Te Aro Baths one day this week. The sharks who run up the prices of the necessaries of life .are still at large, however. —That a local visitor to Wellington has had some most pressing invitations to stay a' while. He. however, managed to tear himself away from the bluepaper brigade. —That Bulgaria, like Prussia, is still in the first of three stages through which the military Powers of Europe are endeavouring to pass: Get on; get honour; get honest. —That amongst recent enlistments for the front are several married men in thumble positions with families. Some bachelors in comfortable billets, however, still consider it their bounden duty to stay at home. —That C. H. Barrington's luxurious new 8-cy. jder Cadillacs are absolutely , the finest taxis in Wellington, and are alwa vs ready for long or urgent journeys. Ring up, night or day, 'phono '2269 a and 2040. Address, 142 Sydneystreet.*