It Is Town Talk

Free Lance, Volume II, Issue 60, 24 August 1901, Page 22

It Is Town Talk

— That a leccnt vi&itoi heio \ un r aptly dubbed it "a city of moan streets ' —That theio will bo a lot of: old non ioi sale chean in the Transvaal after the h ar. —That things have been looking up in the medical profession in Wellington lately. — That a local bookmaker told a rathei big punter the other day that he Jncd by honoui." -That burglanes have been so common lately that people aie ceasing to take notice of them -That theie is a ceitain \ oung lady in Wellington who is so piopei" that she refuses e\en to mash" potatoes — That quite a, large uumbei of pn\ate boarding-houses in the city aie called ' Paving guest" estab ishments. — That a lecently discharged lady patient fiom a certain hospital was found to be a malingeiei nue and simple. — That theie lia\ c been some curiosities pei ambulating the town during the past week. They have not had the influenza. — That an old couple, who hay c been married forty-h\ o years, separated the other clay because they could not get on together. —That a local J P. fell off lus bike on Lambton Quay the othei day. Not the first time that justice lias been be.smiiched. - That the term "Maoriland" is gradually being used throughout this colony and the other States instead of "New Zealand." — That a one-time ioadmau in Wellington hah now nsen to the rank of "station manager" in another part of the colony. • — That, although everybody appears to be crying out about there being too much racing few people do anything to minimise it. — That, included in the plunder of one of the lecent lobbenes was what proved to be a nicely made up package of Hansai ds ' — That the pi'isor of a big boat that touches at Wei lnocton was 1 actually ' taken down" b\ two confidence men (|Uite lecentK — That tlieie is some talk of a wealthy Welli lgton gentleman inquiring into the alleged inadequate accommodation for country workeis --That a ceitain candidate, defeated at the last goncial election m tins colony, ha,s got down to chimney sweeping. The old cause ' — That a ceitain oeisonage is addicted to manicuiiug his nails almost continuously. Kvon at high functions he cannot lea\e them alone. --That a lecenth-repoited matinnonlal misfit has ended in le-union One of the parties came into money, and the other lovingh made it up — That, according to a piominent medico a gieat many women here absolute \ ruin their systems b^ drinking v inegar for their complexion. — That though ' too many cooks spoil the bioth," households cannot get .ui\ cooks woith speaking about and have to cook their own goose - -That the belongings of a notonous ciiminal, searched the other da- nannod out a Bible, two piavor books a liMiin book, and a ho^st of tiacts. — That the meichant s assistant who sent a piominent temperance man a bott'e of beer in a panel containing sauce has got the inevitable sack - That tlrcr detestable piactice ol npeiung fnut in lning-rooms and malodoious outhouses is pievalent, not onl\ m tins ciU but all o\ or the eolonv — That Ami'i icm Piohibitionist J G Woolley nitei \ lew ed quite a number of "hard cases" while in Wellington and their talk was of a ' coidial" natme —That .1 locent deatli in Wellington fulfilled, 01^ is said to have fulfilled, a good old Knghsh family curse, handed down thiough a long line of ancestors — That a woman suffering from influenza, who was lokmgU told by a neighbour to put cold tea leaves on the back of her neck actualh went and did so That St Pen i - Cliunli, Pahneiston. is a shingle 01 so shoit and attendants have eithei to change seats or shove up umbiellas when nun den-toiid-otlu

—That a bicycle, ndden about by a city lady, has been discovered to liavo boon stolen, and tbo pel son she procured it from is away on a "holiday tnp " - That a we'l known clerk, who walked down Cuba and Manneis streets in ,i duty pair of Moleskins for a wagei, luis been called "old mole\" evei since - That the manner in which ladies cvii tin it purses stiongly tempts tlne\es to snatch them One snapped m t,he street last week contained only a pawn ticket. —That Mr. Hall-Jonc&'s Money-lend-eis" Bill will, if it becomes law, cupple industiv — the mdustiy that turns t \n honest nenny into a pound that cannot be .so described. — That a railway officer jocose'y offeied to tell a young man wheie all the tunnels were located on the line, and their length He had noticed nco in the bride's hair. — That a Southern musician is lepoited to have discovered a vocalist who will electrify all the crowned heads, bald heads, and dead heads of Euiope in a year or so -That the talk about letumed Contingenters being unable to obtain work is largely hysteiical Mam, who have been supplied with Gloveinment billets, have thrown them up That a little yam, that has been staking round the town dunng the last week, relates to a blackmailer, who cot moie than he bargained for fioni a plucky man-about-tow n — That a dying woman had heiself photographed lieie the other day, and complained that tho rough pi oof shown hei did not do her justice, and died befoie the older was completed — That a lad, told by a lailway guazd not to take a dog into a compartment because it would mteiteie witii passengei s, said lie did not know that passengeis uavellod undei the seats. --That a man who was. made a J.P. not long ago had been piomised the honour" previoublv but it was found he could .scaicely zead or write. He has been schooled in tho interim. That a woman, who hoaid that McLaren's cricket team was about to \ lsit Australia, wanted to know if he was am i elation to lan McLaien, tho author, w hose book she was reading. That a snobbish individual, who loudiy iemaiked that football was .in amusement of the vulgah at Athletic Park on Saturday, was offcied his shilling back by a sarcastic by-stander. - -That e\ er> weary old aigument e\ ci used since the first New Zealand financial statement was made is still being worked to convince the people they aie undergoing the alleged annual theft - That there is an idiomatic, compiehensive, paralysing unctiousness about the cuss words of a Rugby spectator, tho remarks of one well-diessed cad at the Sidney match shocked not a few -That a ceitain piolubitionist has got into the habit of nnging up the police on Sundays and after hours w hen lie thinks people aie in ceitain hotels So far, however, no cases" have eventuated. - That, owing to a funny mistake, a fashionable ciowd lately turned up to a toney weddin- at a local chmeh, and it pioved to be a puny little countiy affan The other ceremony was celebrated pin ately -That the Piesbytenans of Wellington aie following Scnptuial injunctions by mtioducing a brass band into then services 'With trumpets also and shawms" was scnptui ally consideied correct to show -going in lehgious e\eicisos. - That C'hiistehuich is fond of putting up lecoids, and it established another la&t week when it held a big 'socia'" to welcome back Bishop Gfi lines horn a three-months' toui of the West ( oaht The recoid ho.s in the fact that the Ui'-hop did not tuin up to be welcomed ITo ai rived next day - -That the placing undei the heading Accidents and Fatalities" of the announcement that Lord Rantuilv was born foitv-h\o yeais ago to-day" was undoubted h an accident — neaily a fatality when the sub-editoi got on the foi eman compositor's tiacks That Mr Flatman's (|iioi\ to the Government as to the appointment of inspectors of buildings undei the Municipal Coiporations Act of 1900 is worthj of instant consideiation Fi ost is not responsible for all the collapses or building mistakes m the city