SOME GOOD STORIES.

North Otago Times, 22 May 1909, Page 1 (Supplement)

SOME GOOD STORIES.

In (he early nineties the first priz.i In thii'Austral Wheel Race, held, at the Melbourne Cricket Ground' was . XI,OOO, naturally great efforts wcro made to secure this sum. A certain wheelman related how ho attempted to capture the prize about A 902. He was a careful reader of tho English cycling papers, and notet) the advent of the pneumatic tyre.' ' Here was his chance I He sent ' home twenty, or thirty pounds for a pneumatic-tyred bicycle, and when it arrived, had it conveyed to his residence with the utmost secrecy. When he got jt oiled up, and ready, he took a trial spin in the darkness of tho nignt, and as it sped along noiselessly and speedily, ha felt, with, a thrill, that the £I,OOO was his, for none of the old stylo, solid tyred machines could come near it.

When the great day arrived he wheeled his bike (o the Melbourne cricket .ground, where the sports took place—to bo met. by about a round dozen of other cunning competitors who had also imported pneumatics!! The prize fell, of course, to one of the new machines (not that of thi> narrator) but it was only after as hard a struggle as any previously witnesses on the ground.

Spiritualism flourishes in Australia as elsewhere. Some years ago a party of commercial travellers were playing cards in Hobnrt, Tasmania, when one, a very stout man, flushed crimson on looking at his cards and exclaimed: "I g-o -" but he never completed m's sentence, but fell forward on the table, quite dead. He had n weak heart and the excitement caused by his receiving a remarkablehand had been too much for him. Five years later two of the commercials happened to attend a public seance in Sydney, when the Medium told them that a certain spirit nam* ed Brown—we will say—wished to speak to them through her. This was their old friend of the card tragedy. Asked what ie wished to say the answer came with startling abruptness; "Nap." He had completed his sentence! !

This brings to mind the story of the seance whereat the spirit'of Lindley Murray appeared. "Are you the spirit of Lindley Murray the illustrious grammarian?" was asked, and the veracious spook cheerfully replied: "I a r vl"

Patrick Murphy, unable to obtain employment in the land of his birth, wandered into a far country, bringing up finally on a largo fruit farm. 110 was busy packing apples ono day when a benevolent old gentleman gave him a "Good morning." After watching the worker for some time in silence the old gentleman said:

"Pack them honest, Murphy—right through the barrel alike. Docs not your mastar know that honest packing pays in the end ? '■' "Faith, and he docs, sor," replied Pat pointing to the top of the barrel, "for he's give me orders to alius pack thim honest in this ind."

"What docs it mean when it says 'Mr. Jones will be run in the Liberal interest' ?" asked the foreigner. "That's only another way of saying he will stand." "Hut stand ? Stand for what ?" "Why, for the seat, of course," replied the instructor, as if it were all as clear as noonday. An hour later the puzzled Frenchman might have been heard saying very earnestly to himself: "When you run, you stand; when you stand, it is for a seat, Oh I j»u wonderfuj English 1 "'