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North Otago Times, 5 December 1908, Page 1 (Supplement)

"Let go that jib-sheet 1" roared tho skipper, as the squall struck the "Saucy' Margaret." , , "I'm not touching tho beastly thing," snapped the novice who had joined ' the yacht's crew,

The spirit in which .the Order of Ikronetage was created was frankly cynical.

■lames J. w a s desperately hard up, and could not devise new ways of replenishing the exchequer.

The ready mind of the Earl of Salisbury was equal to the emergency, Let the King create two hundred baronets, each of whom should pay £IOOO for his dignity.

Tlio King was willing to raise the money, but ho feared to raise the men. It would greatly offend the gentry, lie said. "Tush, sire," replied the uncourtly Earl of Salisbury, ' "Tush, sire, you wanty the money ; v it will do you good; the honour will do the gentry very little harm," The King created the Order, and pocketed the resultant wealth. Every man paid a thousand, pounds.— "Evening Standard,"

Philosophy, it has'been said,, is the art of Bearing-''other people's troubles. Tho truest philosopher I ever Heard of was a woman; She was brought into the hospital suffering from a poisoned leg. The house-surgeon made a hurried examination. He was a nian of- blunt speech. "It wilLhavc to come off," lie told her.' > • "What, not (ill of it ?"• "The whole ofjt,Tam sorry to say," growled tlfc house-surgeon, "Nothing,else for it?" ■

"No other chance for vou whatever," explained the housc-surgean. "Ah well, thank Gawd it's not my 'ead.'— From .the Angel qnd'• the Author," by Jerome K. Jerome.

Bello-rThis new hat I got doesn't sult'm.v hair at. all. Maud—Well, dear, and which art you goicg to chwga?