Sandy’s Whimsicalities

Northland Age, Volume 5, Issue 3, 18 October 1935, Page 8

Sandy’s Whimsicalities

Dear Maister Editor. —A wad like ye tae ken that a haverin buckie telt me the ither day. A wad mak a graund Member o’ Paurliament. Noo A’ll no say he wis richt, an’ on the ither haund A’ll no say he wis wrang, because ye see it taks a lot o’ different kinds o’ folk tae mak a warld, an’ that staunds the same for M.Ps. Ony way, judgin’ by some o’ the candidates A wadna be the only fule i’ the Hoose. Nae fear o’ that. A’m telt that .we’re tae hae anither lad up for the Bay of Islands. A’m nae richt shair what he staunds for, an’ atween you an’ me A’m no sae shair. the lad kens himsel’. Sae that wad mak five candidates tae woo the electors. It looks kind o’ like the Bay cornin’ intil its ain when sae mony brainy lads want tae be oor M.P. Ony way A had a dream the ither nicht, an’ a fine sonsie lass sang this sang i’ ma lug—A wis dreamin’ ye ken : Sing hey! for the noble Democrats wha want tae prove their worth: Hark tae the Independent lads wha sing the sweetest sangs on earih; The National Fed. has the same auld sang, an’ they sing it oot loud wi’ glee “Gin ye gar us yer votes at election time ’twill prove what wise folks ye be.” Weel, ye can think what ye like, but A was gey sorry A woke up. Man! yon lassie could sing. Of coorse A. wisna particularly interested i’ the lassie. Oh no, A’m no a chiel o’ that sort ava. A’m thinkin’ that we’re gaun tae hae some lively times before election day. Mind ye A’m gaun tae prophesy that we’ll hae a warm dry summer till the election day is bye, an’ then the rain’ll likely start again. Ye see it’s this way. Sic a lot o’ hot air wull be thrawn oot on the air that things will be as dry as some o’ the candidates, an’ after the deeeision is made the steam frae the saut, saut tears frae the defeated candidates wull chairge the air wi’ ower muckle water, an’ doon she’ll come again as blythe as ever. A wonner gin A’ll be richt ?

A see by the papers that Gordon an’ Georgie hae developed acrobatics. Back aboot April whan Mr. Savage wanted them tae gie the unemployed an extra ten bob a week tae keep them frae starvation he was telt it wad tak aboot £9,000,000 tae dae't. Noo Gordon an’ his mate are gaun tae gie the men work an’ standard wages. Man it gar a body wonner what for they didnt dae’t lang syne. Gin they can dae’t noo they could hae dune at least something then. Ae chap says it’s wonnerfu’ the effect o’ an election on G. an’ G. Man their actions are harder tae pick oot than the Gee-Gees at Ellerslie or Potter’s Paddock. Anither thing A wonner is gin Gordon and Georgie are descended frae Belthazar, wha saw the writin’ on the wa’. Ye’ll mind it, Maister Editor. It gaud something like this : “Minnie, Minnie, tickle the parson.” I forget the rest. Guid nicht. AULD SANDY.