LAUGHTER COLUMN

Northland Age, Volume III, Issue 34, 2 September 1931, Page 7

LAUGHTER COLUMN

In the railway station at Wilkesbarre, which has a large Slavic population, is a sign over the bootblack stand, bearing the legend : “Shine 5 cents. Polish 10 cents.” An Irishman stood.in front of it the other day, apparently plunged in profound thought. At length he pulled his pipe from his mouth and spat vigorously.

“Faith, and they’d be doin’well to char-r-rge double for dagoes too,” was his emphatic comment.

Angry Purchaser—Didn’t you tell me that you had got as many as twelve eggs in one day from those eight hens you sold me ? Poultry Raiser—Yes ma’am.

Angry Purchaser—Then why is it that I’m never able to get more than two eggs from them and sometimes not so many, in one day.

Poultry Raiser—l don’t know, ma’am, unless it’s because you look for eggs too often. Now, if you look for them only once a week I leel quite positive that you will get just as many eggs in one day as I did.

The new foreman was hustler. Nothing escaped his eagle eye, and whenever he saw a workman suffering from a tired feeling he quickly woke him up. So when he discovered a bricklayer snatching a quiet Dipe behind a wheelbarrow his wrath arose mightily.

“What do you think you are paid for? Get on with your job if you don’t want to get fired pretty quick!”

“All right, boss,” rejoined the workman. “Keep your ’air on. Rome wasn’t built in a day you know.”

“That may Te,” rejoined the hustler, “but f wasn’t foreman of that job.”

“How gaily the flakes are dancing !” “Yes, this is the snowball season, you know.”

“How is that young brother of yours getting along since he went to the city ?” said one Rockaway oyster to another.

“The last report we had from him was that he had got himself into a stew,”

,! I want something nice in oil for a dining-room.” “Yes, madam. A landscape or a box of sardines,”