MORE SHOCKING IGNORANCE! [Prom Punch.]

Nelson Examiner and New Zealand Chronicle, Volume III, Issue 111, 20 April 1844, Page 27

MORE SHOCKING IGNORANCE! [Prom Punch.]

A short time ago Punch had occasion to horrify his readers by publishing the Report of his Select Committee on Education, which revealed the amount of ignorance of domestic matters prevailing among young men generally. His Commissioners have just sent up to him their second- Report, which relates to the knowledge of business and the affairs of life possessed by young ladies; and he has determined, at the risk of creating a fearful panic in the marriage market, to print it. Miss Mary Anne Watkins examined. — Is the daughter of a private gentleman. Has several brothers and sisters. Is engaged to be married to a young surgeon as soon as he can get into practice. Has an idea that she ought to know something of housekeeping; supposes it comes naturally. Can sing and play; draw and embroider. Cannot say that she ever darned a stocking. The price of brown Windsor soap is from Is. to Is. 3d. the packet; cannot tell what yellow comes to; never bought any. Circassian cream is half-a-crown a pot ; does not know the price of pearlash. Knows how to furnish a house; would go to the upholsterer's and buy furniture. Cannot say how much 'she would expect to give for an easy chair, or for a wash-hand-stand, or for a set of tea-things ; should ask mama, if necessary ; never thought of doing so before. Papa paid for the dress she has on ; forgets what he gave for it. Has no notion what his butcher's bill amounts to in the year. Miss Harriet Somers. — Papa is a clergyman. Is unable to say whether he is a pluralist or not. He is a curate, and has but one curacy. Expects to be married, of course. Would not refuse a young man with £300 a year. Has no property of her own. Has some skill in needlework; lately worked a brigand in red, blue, green, and yellow worsted. Can make several washes for the complexion. Cannot tell. how she would set about making an ample-dumpling. Loaves should remain in the oven till they are done ; the time they would take would depend upon circumstances. If she were married, would expect her husband to be ill sometimes ; supposing him to be ordered calves-f oot jelly, should send for it to the pastrycook's. It never occurred to her that she might make it herself. If she tried, should buy some calves' feet ; what next she should do cannot say. Has received a fashionable education; knows French and Italian. Likes dancing better than anything else.

Miss Jane Briggs. — Is the daughter of a respectable tradesman — a grocer and tea-dealer. Looks forward to a union with somebody in her own station of life. Was for five years at a boarding-school in Clapham. Really cannot say what a ledger is ; it may be same as a daybook. Has an album. Has painted flowers in the album ; also butterflies. Has never ironed a frill. Knows what a receipt is ;it tells you how to dress things. Should suppose that a receipt in full was a receipt that told you all particulars. Never heard of s balance sheet; it may be a calico sheet for aught she knows. Cannot say whether papa buys or sells at prime cost. Has eaten fowl occasionally. Never trussed one. Docs not know how to make stuffing for a duck or a goose. Miss Elizabeth Atkins. — Resides at Hampstead, with her parents. Papa is a solicitor; has offices in Grays-inn. Will have a little money of her own shortly, when she comes of age. Is not aware whether she is a minor or not. The property was left her by an aunt. Cannot say whether she is a legatee or testatrix. Her property is real property. Is sure of that. It is in the funds. Should say that it was not personal property, as it was not anything about her person. Knows what Consols are,; has read about them in history ; they were ancient Romans. Mamma keeps house. When she marries, expects to do the same. Is unable to say what the family milk-score is a week. Starch is used to stiffen collars ; has no notion what it is a pound, or what made of, or whether it is used with hot water or cold. Drugget is cheaper than a Turkey carpet; but how much, cannot say. Her time is principally occupied in fancy-work, reading novels, and playing quadrilles' and waltzes on the piano. Out of the sixty other young ladies examined, three only knew how to corn beef, six what a sausage was composed of, and four how to make onion sauce. Not one of the whole number could brew. They mostly could tell what the last new song was ; but none of them knew the current price of beef. Every soul of them meant to marry as soon as possible. What is to become of their husbands ? Echo answers " What !" and Punch shudders at the idea.