WEEKLY WHISPERS.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XLIII, Issue XLIII, 3 April 1909, Page 2

WEEKLY WHISPERS.

If there's a hole hi a' your coats, 1 rede ye teiii it ; A chiefs among ye takin notes. And, faith, he'll preut it. —Burns. An All Fool's Day impromptu and unrehearsed ettiect were tsecured (on Wednesday by our mutual friend the local bellman. He had been engaged by the stewards of the Jockey t'lub to cry the postponement of the races owing to the weather. He started upon his task and had rung up and called out at one or two points, when a few farceurs {who themselves may have been had fur all one knows) spoke to him and said : "Gam, you chump, they are pullin' yer' leg. There's no postponement of the race 3. It's April Fool's Day I" "By Christchurch!" responded the bellman, "so it is!" He then dropped his bell, danced a fandango on his hat, made straight for the Vice-President of the Jockey Cub, and asked in stentorian tones what in thunder x he meant by making a fool of a "pore workin' man !" It iook the vkp-president- half-an-hour, and some judicious lubrication, to convince the bellman that all was "honest injun." The bellman then resumed his round and continued to call the costponement, with one eye cocked for the jokers who had "had" him. With regard to the allegation that Miss Ada Ward, ex-actress and now an evangelist, intended to return to the staged the appended Melbourne leleerom probably indicates how the misconception arose :— "Speaking at a welcome by tha Salvation Army, Miss Ada Ward, the .one-time prominent actress, said she had a way in her heart of helping theatrical people, but it was not vet quite mature, because it would have to be with the assistance of some of the leading people in, London. She had corresponded with a 3 ood many in the theatrical profession m London, and had expressed her willingness to go back to them if they would receive her in some other way, but not as an actress. She added. 'I want to help them in any way I can in connection with my mi?s : .on." • • • • The church bazaar melon seems to be a thriving industry in New South Wales. An' Orange (Western District) telegram says :— Harvest festivals are being held all over the district m connection with the Protestant churches. ■Ml the .rifts are sold and the proceeds go to the church fund. Melons are the principal source of revenue There is great rivalry among the different churches and exorbitant prices are paid at auction for melons worth only a shilling or two. If prices go for anything,'melons grown in the Orange district are tho most valuable in the world. At the Methodist Harvest festival at Millthorpe. on Monday night, £5 17s was paid for a melon of the ordinary size.

Aii English paper gives the following advice to sinners upon the stibjuct of encores :— "Singers might, before responding with an encore, almost before they have left- the platform, deliberate as to (1) whether the request is really made, or (2) whether they think it ought to have been made or would :-ave been made if they had given 'he audience time to make it In the caso of (1) they might alfo pause and donsider whether the desire of the audience is really (a) that they are pleased and would like some more, or (b) whether they would only want to i'ct a little more must-: for their adiivssion money, or (c) whether they are dissatisfied, but would like the singer to try again." As to pianists:— "lt is unnecessary to play little improvised preludes before commencing works of the great masters. Singers do not sing little airs between each item. This sort of thing may be safely left to society entertainers" Though individuality counts for something, pianists are reminded that Beethoven should be Beethoven faithfully interpreted by Jones, and not Jones through the medium of Beethoven. Twirling the stool up and down, 'business' with pocket handkerchief, testing the pedals, rubbing the keys, taking off rings, aud such like tricks do not add to the effect. The sustaining pedal is there to be used, not abused. It exists for the purpose of sustaining the tone, not necessarily for making a lot of noise. It can also be u«ed for marking the phrases, not obscuring them. The "summum bonum" of a pianist's art is not the ability to play pieces faster than anyone else." Violinisti an- informed that "the violin'" is an instrument of music, not a Crystal Palace firework show. Performers are reminded that the swaying of the body as near to the stand as is possible without overturning it may be a clever art of jugglery, but is not necessarily a proot of virtuosity. All violins are not 'Strads' that are so lattlled. There are other violin pieces (beside Wieniawski.'s 'Airs Russes,' flarf's Cavatina,' and Mendelssohn'; Concerto in E min.ir. A violin tuned in the artist's room is just as ii<«t:il as that timed in the presence of the .violence.'

"Audiences." <-ays tile same instruclive writer, "should understand that encouragement is a virtue; inlisnimi nate applapjp_e a vice. Members 'pf tLe audience aie requested to refrain from loudly-expressed criticism during a performance. lt may lead to reprisals from other mcnili ts rear by not in .Tgreement. Besides, if adverse, who knows but that tie .irlist's r u.hir ami brothel* _re sitting in rl-se proximity .' Relatives of artists are asked to stop handing up iloral tributes. They may be recognised, and the artist may be accused of sending flowers to herself. Do not be disconcerted if the performers glare at you when you turn up late. Provided that you do not enter in the middle of a piece, v° u have a perfect right to come in when you choose. They ought to be grateful to see you there at all."

Practically, says tho "Post," the Wellington Rugby Union asked the Wellington Hospital Trustees to quote a tender for the healing or mending ot bruised or battered footballers, but in the absence of moderately reliable specifications the board was shy about undertaking to do the renovations at a fixed amount for the season. The members were really wise to decline tho "lump" sum" proposition. Apparently, continues the "Post," the Union expected the trustee to ascertain the accident potentialities of Rugby by an experimental seven-a-side match or two with a team from the District Hospital Board, with, perhaps, the Hon. C. M. Luke as a half-back captain of one side, and Mr J. P. Luke skip . pering the other side from the position of five-eighths. Really, the union should have submited a rough estimate of the amount of damaged footballers that might be sent along for repairs. It was due to the union to make a quotation of the crumpled "scrummers' ears" for smoothing and soothing by the gentle hands of the nurses ; the "football knees," the broken collarbones, the twisted noses, "the split lips, and the other litle temporary inconveniences that come to a footballer. Possibly tbe union regrets that there is not another public hospital here, so that competitive tenders might be invited for making straight the crooked nose and the setting of a hrok.Jn limb. At present the cautious trustees will only undertake to take each case as it comes, and charge accordingly. They are averse from quoting a wholesale price.

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[ In the Insolvency Court at Bendigo (Vie.) the other day, the Official Assign., said that of 87 insolvents last year, 71 put down their assets as "nil." Most of that number practically said to their tradesmen : "If you push me I will go insolvent." Only four or five out of the 87 had assets of any consequence. Judge Eagleson remarked that the Act was only intended for a man who was overtaken "By misforune, and for the ho test trader. Men who went on borrowing until they could not beg a shilling, and those who started business with nothing and ran considerably into debt, were dishonest, and would get no considerition from him.