Winning Jokes

Northern Advocate, 9 December 1937, Page 4

Winning Jokes

* Following are the jokes that decided prize winners in the Jumbled Names competition, results of which are announced to-day:— (Sent in by Harold Webster.) Drowning Man: “Throw me a lifebelt, quick!” Holiday-making Tailor: “Yes, sir. What size waist, please?” * !'< <1 ■) (Sent in by Ani Pirihi.) Medical Officer: “Any scars on you?” Nervous Recruit: “No, sir. But I’ve got some cigarettes if you’d like one.” (Sent in by Robert Pirihi.) Magistrate (to prisoner): “How big was the brick you threw? Was it as large as my head?” Prison: “Yes, your honour. But not so thick.” * a * $ (Sent in by Irene Clark.) Teacher (to small boy): “Do you know what the Royal Mint is, Harry?” Harry: “Yes, miss. It’s what the King puts on his roast lamb.” * :fc * * (Sent in by Dorothy Bell.) A shark was seen by the crew of a ship, and it continued to follow the chip. A box of oranges was thrown overboard and the shark swallowed it and still followed. A chair was then thrown over and the shark still followed the ship. The crew, who were very superstitious, then became alarmed, and. they decided to draw lots to see who should be thrown overboard for the shark. An old woman drew the unlucky number and was duly thrown to the shark, which swallowed her, and still followed the ship. So the skipper decided to catch the shark, and he baited a hook with a lump of salted pork. The shark was caught and pulled on to the ship. It was cut open and they found the old woman sitting on the chair selling oranges three a penny.