DICTIONARY FOR FOOTBALLERS.

Northern Advocate, 23 July 1920, Page 3

DICTIONARY FOR FOOTBALLERS.

MORE OR LESS.

Appeal: A yelp of indignation. Dead Ball Line: An imaginary line anywhere behind tho goal posts. Football: A plaything that must, be sown with not loss than eight stitches lo the inch. The Game of Football: We read in present-day encyelopocdias that football was played by the Romans; but looking carefully through tho prehistoric archives, we find thai the Moriori indulged in some strenuous games before even tho .Maoris thought of sorting sail for Hawaiki. In those days there wore many "clubs"; in fact, every player carried one. Furthermore, each player- appears to have boon his own referee, and his decisions, provided they were given quickly and smartly, loft no room for complaint in tho mind of ihe offending party. Each club had many meetings, even during the course of a game; in fact, ihe success or otherwise of tho game was decided largely on the number of such meetings. If the club mot in the vicinity of an adversary's solar plexus, it was the attacking parry, strangely enough, who was said to have obtained a mark. Nevertheless it was the obstructing party who took the free kick, which was taken lying on his back with his heels up, and more frequently than not was his last free kick in that or any subsequent game. If two players marked each other simultaneously, the transaction frequently culminated in a double-barelled inquest. If the club met in the vicinity of an adversary's head, the latter was said to have crossed the "Dead Ball Line," or to be dead. If the club failed oven by a hairs-breadth to make actual contact, it was said to be a "Touch and Go," of which the present-day touch-in-goal is possibly a vile imitavion.

Hacking, or Ripping-up.—This appears to have boon not only not illegal, but indeed one of the features that characterised keen aggressive football.

Studs. —Each club was allowed the use of studs, the same to bo not more than one inch in circumference at, the base, nor less than one-thousandth of an inch in circumference at the tip, and to be not more than six inches long.

Time Off. —Play was not allowed to stop for such trivial matters as wiping club or of scalping one's opponent.

"Grounds" of Dispute. —In case of any dispute, tho home team appears to have been held responsible for faulty ground arrangements, and was penalised according to the strict code of

the gamo. Let 'Em All Come. —During the course of nny game, players were allowed to go on to the field and take an active part in the game provided that there was not sufficient material or tangible objection offered by the opposing Bide. Sole Arbiters: The players themselves

were solo judges of matter of fact, but as regards matter of law, there appears to have been no final court of appeal. Protests: Appealing by the players, particularly by the defending players, appears to have been the order of the day, notwithstanding the fact that such appeals were put down with a strong hand on every possible occasion. What Was It?: If a player ran back over his own goal-line he was summarily dealt with by the captain of his own side by • (the caligraphy was hero too indistinct to be deciphered). Side-Step: A player charged by an opponent was advised to side-step at once. The words "at once" wore to be inter-

preted very strictly. Drop-Out A player was said to be tackled when he was so held that he could neither side-step nor pass his opponent, in which case it was his duty to immediately drop between his opponent and his opponent's goal. Sport Tenets: The players were strongly advised to play the game in

the spirit in which the laws were written, and particularly that one side should not gain an advantage through its own faults —a phenomenon which, from all accounts, very seldom happened. Stripping.—Players were advised to divest, themselves of such sotrrces of danger as buckles, ear and nose rings, nikau-sporrans, and hair-skewers before going on to the field. Cany On: If, when a law was broken lor any irregularity of play occurred not otherwise provided for, the game was allowed to proceed. Encroachment: There appears to have been very little difficulty in those days of keeping the spectators back behind the side-lines. On Points: The games were decided on points, the team possessing most club points at the end of the season being declared the winners. Sociability: After each game it was customary for the winning team to be entertained at a dinner provided by the losing side. The toast-list was frequently a long one: in fact, every player on the losing side was toasted, while he replied in language too irrideseent for publication. Football Ignorance: A highly infectious and malignant disease —either acute or chronic. The acute condition is curable, but the treatment for the chronic condition, involving as it does, a certain small amount of mental effort, would probably kill the patient. Junior: See senior. Kensington Park: A playing area, that in its present state is an actual source of danger to the speedy knight of tho leather. Well-drained, nicely- , levelled and turfed, it would prove a wholesome asset to the sport-loving pub- . lie, and automatically a source of re- | venue to the town—but, oh I Dear me! etc.

lane Umpire or Touch .fudge: An obliging individual who carries a flag, i-uivers in the cold, and gets wet, is lia-

Mv at any moment iv be over-ruled, to be ordered into the i;o__i county by the referee, or even to bo reported to tho Rugby Union.

No-Afau's Land: That Slough of Despond and shout-cut for the sporting frateruitj .o Kensington, extending from the High School entrance to Powliiri Avenue —a dear case for the activities of the Powers That Be.

Player: The actual king-post of the game, and tho actual working unit of the Rugby Union; but, strangely enough, he is subservient to spectator, referee and Rugby Union .dike. His real position is decidedly peculiar Five Yards Serum: Too often a loophole of escape for the incompetent referee. Pointer: A quadruped straight in the wrong member, viz., the tail. Referee: A football official who is asked (1) to give his services and halfholiday tree, gratis and for nothing; <-!) to be physically lit and sound; (3) iv accept heaps of wide-mouth criticism and very little kudos; (4) to know from A to __, and to be able to interpret the most complicated and the vaguest of all rule books. In short, he is maityr and gentleman with a halo all in one.

Referees' Association: A body of wise men gathered together for the purpose of deciphering a certain code of modern hieroglyphics; otherwise the intelligence department of a football organisation.

Rule Book: A weird publication, of which the meaning in parts is as difficult to decipher as the hieroglyphics of ancient Egypt,

Spectators: These may be classifred as follows: (1) Those who understand the game; (-) those who do not understand the game. The second class may be futher subdivided into: (a) Those who know they don't understand the game; (b) those who think they do understand the game. This last-mention-ed sub-class represents a variety of a species of soap-box orator who knows more about tho game than either the referee or the rule-book. In fact, his knowledge is of the dangerous kind. He wants neither judge nor jury to teach him the right from the wrong. As Omar exclaimed: "He knows, he knows . . . ." Senior: See Junior. Toueh-Linc: A straight line beyond which spectators rarely encroach, for the only apparent reason that they are afraid of getting hurt,