TUNING UP

Manawatu Times, Volume XLIX, Issue 3490, 28 October 1926, Page 14

TUNING UP

The orchestra was tuning up. '"l’m a live wire,” said the harp. “I’ve inspired some of the most bea.ufiful' thoughts in our greatest bards.”

"Personally,” cut in the piano, “I should call you a lyre, but I won't harp on it.” “Oh, fiddlc-dc-dco to all this squabbling,” squeaked the violin; "have you ever heard me in Beethoven in DV”

The piccolo whistled derisively; “In D flat, wasn’t it?”

“Well, I’m blowod!” giggled the flute. “Go on;” encouraged the bass viol, backing up his fair cousin. “I wouldn’t piccolo joke like that to snigger at. why ” ' “book here!!’ put in the kettledrum “ibis beats me hollow; you creatures make, me boil!” “We’d belter have tea them!” roared the bassoon to make himself beard. “It’s all jealousy; the eternal triangle !” "If you’re hinting at. me!’ rang out from the triangle. “I —I’ll call on the bugle to sound the ‘Last Post’!” “Gone ages ago, my dear thing!” tillered the castanets.

“Well, don't clap mo on the back in that familiar way!” At last the baton got up, and rapped angrily. "This is more than I’ll stand!” “Speak for yourself!” said the music stand. “Who d'you think you’re, hitting?” “I’ve made many a hit,” said the baton proudly, ’’and no thanks to you!” “Rot, man, why ” The conductor entered. Each instrument ceased jangling. The baton raised itself imperiiously in the conductor’s hand, with a last glint of triumph at them all; especially at the music stand, which had covered its face with a sheet of music. “You seel’’ whispered the baton, “you’ve jolly well all got to do whirl I tell you.” “Now then!” And the band really did play (his time. Its the tuning up is so discordant. G.H.