IDLE THOUGHTS.

Mount Ida Chronicle, 22 June 1900, Page 6

IDLE THOUGHTS.

[Bs Idlek] THE CXI ONICLES OF IDARENSIS. It is many years since any record hath been given to the people of tin: Chronicles of Idarensis. It hath bethought me that I might (ill in my idle time by making a record of what trauspireth in the history of Idarensis that the people might bo benefitted thereby. For many years the people of Idarensis and the surrounding country lived in peace and amity, but it came to pass in course of time that owing to the advent of the iron • horse, otherwise known as Puffing Billy, there arose little kingdoms all around Idareusis, so that it was no longer the mighty and powerful city it once was. The merchants of Idareusis grieved deeply over its departing greatness for the Bucolics (which being interpreted meaueth 'orny-'andedn) from the country no longer came in Cotpend their shekels and their coffers thereby waxed lighter. And in the year 1900 there reigned over Idarensis one Heidniius, a man deeply versed in the mysteries of the law and the profits, and who was surnained the Just, for ho was famed for the wisdom and justness of his administration. In his reign the people of Idarensis bethought themselves that they would hold a grand carnival, at which there should be exhibits of all that was grown in the surrounding country, and at which there should be a large attendance of the Bucolics. But it came to pass that the Bucolics looked coldly on the great carnival of Idarensis. and ueitlier sent exhibits or attended it themselves in any gieat numbers so that it resulted in a dismal failure. The King of Idarensis was wrath that his city should lie thus treated, and at a gathering in the evening spoke great words of harshness against the Bucolics.

When one John Cynicus, a keeper of flocks and herds and a worker in metals, of Poverty Flat, saw it in the records of Idarensis he smole a deep and crafty smile, and communed within himself thusly : Ah ! I see the King of Idarensis is sore over the failure of his carnival. Am I not the philosopher and wit of all this country ! Who ia there between all Poverty Flat and the sea that can withstand the withering sarcasm of John Cynicus? I know the sore spot on which to touch the King of Idarensis, and I will make him feel the sting of my wit. Yea ! it snail be like salt rubbed into a wound—so much so that his soul shall wither within himself, and lie feels Unit he could hide within a nutshell. Then shall everybody look on in v/ouder and admire the wonderful wit of John Cynicus, and 1 shall get honor—yea, much honer—in the sight of tlie common people. And it came to pass that next day he wrote to the Chronicles of Idarensis a letter which he raked up memories of times when in the King of Idarensis was made to feel small in his own sight and his subjects laughed at his expense. And John Cynicus laughed ZT.i v -eut to bed and dreamed ot the discomfiture of the King oi'iuareuiw. Now when the King of Idarensis read the writing he was wrath for he was sore for the wound was deep, and he was young and tender like a spring chicken and had not yet learned that he who would occupy the high places of the earth and lead the people must not wear his heart 011 his sleeve for tlie jnckdxwh to pe<<U at. So he cried iu anger : Who is this John Cynicus that dares to withstand me ? Doth he aspire to be the leader of the people of Poverty Fiat'? Lo, he raketh up tilings I would forges, ;>,nd trieth to make my subjects despise me. Shall it be that this Cynicus shall magnify himself at the expense of the King of 1.3 arenses? No! 1 will leave my parchments for a while, aud I will sweep this Cynicus —this miniature Dean Swift—from my path. Yes lie shall retire to the obscurity of tending his flocks like a whipped dog with bis tail between his legs. So the King of Idarensis rose in his might and wrote a biting aud sarcastic let ter, for he was a man of great understanding—so much so that even the beetles dreaded his approach—and swots John Cynicus hip and thigh, and when John saw it he was out to the qnicl: ur.r> grieved norsly, and said to himself, Lo, I have besn jji-iy'ng v.'ith ;t two-edge: 1 , sword which cuts both way's. He hatli ppiriicuted me with niy ova weapons. I shall no io'iger be looked up to as tha oraele of wit and wisdom, and he groaned deeply in the auguiih o£ his spirit.. What shall lao ? Ai; : I havo it. i will pose as a martyr to the iil-feeUiig oi Ihe Kinrr of Idarensis, and write asking hi:n ior permission to publish the cause of this ill-feeling, and then shall I get sympathy from the common people. Here audeth the First Chapter.