BRIEF MENTION.

Marlborough Express, Volume XLIV, Issue 56, 11 March 1910, Page 5

BRIEF MENTION.

"A little nonsense now and then, ia relished by the wisest men."

Unsettled and cloudy weather. Right O! Bates. Got 'em. Try a little ice.

Progress seldom comes on a track She makes her own way.

Women are eligible to become properly qualified dentists in England.

It used to be Kitchener of Khartoum fame, but since the illustrated papers got hold of him it is Kitchener of cartoon fame.

"Did you have a good time at the Sunday school picnic, Bobby?" "I should say so," answered Bobby, enthusiastically; "there were three fights."

Judge Greenhow, at Leeds County Court: Cats and pigeons give rise to more difficult points in law than anything else in the world.

Old Lady (in a shoe shop): Have you felt slippers? Small Boy Assistant (solemnly): Yes, ma'am; many a time ! t

Forty-two thousand necessitous children are being fed in the London County Council schools, compared with 22,000 a year ago.

There is some talk of a system of "wireless electric light." A New York inventor claims to have solved the problem.

"The climax to his wooing was very romantic. He proposed to her on the verge of a mountain gorge." "What did she do?" "She threw him over."

A beggar woman named Mayer, who died of starvation at Schwainungen, Austria, was found to have £2500 hidden in the attic where she lodged.

"A fool and his money are soon parted/ quoted the pessimist. "Yes," rejoined the optimist, "but it's worth while being the fool to have the money to part with."

In the lives of old people all over the country, especially in the rural districts, the pensions are making all the difference between absolute poverty and comparative plenty.— Sir William Hartley at Aintree.

MisS Smith: ' 'You must. remember, children have their uses, if only to perpetuate your name.- Now; when I die I am afraid the name of Smith will die with me." " .

The 'French Academy of Science has announced a method of curing and preventing chilblains. Hold your hand in the air for a few minutes and wriggle the fingers. Do this about 10 times a day.

Mr Stubb: "It's queer, John, that you don't hear of many women going trout-fishing." Mr Stußb: "Not at all, Maria. You know in trout-fishing you can't speak a word for hours at a time."

"What is the matter?" asked a lawyer of his coachman. "The horses are running away, lsir." "Can't you pull them up?" "I am afraid not." "Then," said the lawyer after a judicious delay, "run them into something cheap."

At the North of England Educational Conference at Leeds a speaker declared that pupils centred more interest upon athletics than work, and stigmatised this as a stain which should be removed from our educational system.

"Your husband says that when he is angry he always counts ten before he speaks," said one woman. "Yes," answered the other: "I wish he'd stop it. Home seems to be nothing but a class in arithmetic."

"The tendency of the botanist and the chemist and other scientific teachers is to set problems which would not give a headache to a caterpillar/ said Sir J. J. Thompson at a conference of science teachers at Westminster School.

"I've bought a bulldog," said Parsniff to his friend Lessup, "and I want a motto to put over his kennel. Can you think of something?" "Why not use a dentist's sign, "Teeth inserted here?" suggested Lessup,

The man who whistles seldom swears, In substance may be true, . But when he warbles hackneyed airs The other people do.