FUN ON A STEAMER.

Mataura Ensign, 14 February 1916, Page 4

FUN ON A STEAMER.

rival ventrildouists, TflK TAW.KS ITK\F,I>. Your reminiscences of Signer Blitz recall one of the most amiisiuir incidents that ever occurred (writes a c r-re.sp.-iiuleni ol the 'New York Nun'). Years hel'ore the (,'ivil war a Mississippi strainer on the way to New Orloan-: was crowded with passenger-, whom a score «»f |,n;fess'ous. w. re represented. Jt rained for diys, the weather ho:ng ol lh,i most, <|:.stu;i! nature. I'okcr playinc o.citpi.d many, aiming Ihe participants, sovel al of those iniiuortali-ml by Havel A. Curtis. A party of yoiin;; men iur; tired (>| the monotony soiie.lit- out low ways of a musomeiit. Fm inline; ,S gum - Bit/, ) ered as one <>| liie pass< liters, they hunted up the dapper lilt,.e jreiit-leiiriu and bcyyrd loin In help them out., lilit/, was always ready for anything in the naturonl fun and volUlltoorcil to gi\e thctu all the aid he eoul.d. Ho started with ilicni to iind a Mih.jcci, or victim. Etitcr.'iig the cah--111 i hey saw a clerical-looking lnan sittJiie on a sola, reading a hook. BiiU witikid lo hi.s friends thai- he had the lo low ho wanted and straightway hc;;,iit a display of his rentt'ilo<jii:;il skill. A cat under the sofa moit'd a terrified scrrecli. hut the elerytnan continued readme, unmoved. He niereiy glanced over th(> of his hook and showed no further interest in the party. I lieu a cur flapped at Ins feet, hut. he did not seem to hear hj in. Ahoui this tune Hlit/, loiind li-ne-<lf annoyed by a hoe that continually buy./, d in his tar. Me slapped at it several limes, bill never hit it. Hlit/, w.is on his mette and worked harder than evt r hefor ■, hut- w.tliollt ally seoniille; elft'cl on his subject, who remained absorbed in, his book. Meanwhile, the huy,y,inj; of the her became exasperai Bliii; slapped in vain ii n 111 the nuisance hcraiue unbearable. Suddenly the truth Flashed upon him. Abruptly eeasinjr lis attytnptjt b<'. fared his mystilicd friends. "(icntleineii." lie said, "'il is no use. There's someone in this room who is a better \ cutriloo,uist than I." ■And then the clerical-looking; |i;i'fiongcr laid ii.side Jii.s Ivook, rose lo his left, and Miiilinji'y olfercd Ins liancl. "How do you do, Sij;noi '? I am i'roI'essor Wyiuaii.'' "The joke is on mo." atlmit te<l Biitz.

"I know yon by reputation as one of the lines) \ cut riloujiiists li\";l>ji, but I never had the pleasure of meeting you I before. Let you and me jo'in lorces on this trip." And didn't, those two peorles*, ma:;icians turn that boat upside down! The, waiter who attempted to split, a watermelon dropped it in terror when he. heard an awful groan from within, witli a prayer that he might be spared; the fat old gentleman at ihe head ot tlie tablo jumped u jpwifh an imprecation and kicked at the invisible, do", that was nipping at his legs; the t.niid maiden fainted at the Mjttoaking o,' a mouse on her < hair; waiters fell over one another and came to blow*, in their frenzied attempts to obey no etui of contradictory orders, and even tho.mini old captain began to believe lie "had 'em again." for the rest of Iho trip down the river that steamer wa.s a liii.n.d'emouium ot' fun, consternation, bewilderment and high jiuk>. I was never acquainted with Signer Hilly,, though as a boy I enjoyed many of his exhibitions, but I met Professor Wyinan, ami r< calling the incident, asked him whether it was t mo as related. YVyman threw back bis bead', dsplaying his line mm of teeth, and f-hoik with laughter.' "Every word of it is true," he replied. "Of course, when Hlitx, ami his supcriwiturally so'euin irieuds \valk<d into the cabin 1 knew what it nil meant. I had the advantage in recognising lit:n at once, while he did not dream of my identitv. We became fast I fiends and he and I have, laughed many a turn over the incident you recall.'"