MR. POTTS'S DEAL IN PORK.

Lake Wakatip Mail, Issue 2294, 12 January 1900, Page 6

MR. POTTS'S DEAL IN PORK.

v " I think, my dear, March pork is a good purchase," said Mr. Potts, taking another pancake and skimming over the paper. " I guess we don't need any, thank you," said Mrs. Potts. "If you see any good October batter anywhere, yon might send up a jar." " You don't understand me, my dear, I mean a little speculation. Let me show you how it works. Now I buy 250 barrels of pork at 12dols. 37£ cents, a barrel." "Heaven and earth! Mr. Potts, where are you going to put it all ?" " Don't be so fast, wife. I don't see the pork myself, or have anything to do with it."

" I thought, just now you eaid you were going to send up 250 barrels ? " "No, I didn't The pork I'm going to buy is way off in Chicago. A " How do you know whethei it is good or not, then ?" " Dear me, wife, what do I care whether it is good or bad? I merely go long." " Tou mean you go long minding your own business ?"

" No, no. That's a technical phrase. Let me explain it to yon. You see, when Igo long the bucket shop goes short." " Short ?" "Short, Mrs. Potts." " Short of pork ? Why don't they get some more, dear ?"

" Good Lord, wife, the whole thing is as plain as day. Here Igoto a bucket shop and buy 250 barrels of pork; that, don't you see, makes them beara and me a bull." " Don't you know any better, Mr. Potts, than to talk like that before your own children? I should think you'd be ashamed of yourself, sir. Yet get worse and worse every day." " You don't know what you're talking about. Mrs. Potts. When I buy 250 or 500 barrels of pork, it shows I feel like a bull."

" I should think you feel like an idiot." " I buy 250 barrels of pork, as I said before, Mrs. Potts,and cover it with margins." " What kind of margins?"

" Oh, fire-cent, margins, to begin with." " I should'nt think margins as cheap as that would be good for anything. You'd better let me go and pick them out for you, Mr. Potts; men never know about such things." " 1 buy 250 barrels of pork, Mrs. Potts, and hold on to it until March."

" I thought you said you wouldn't hare any to hold on to." " As 1 said before, Mrs. Potts, I buy 250 barrels of pork, and hold on to it until March comes, and then pork, according to my way of thinking, will be worth a dollar or twi; mom a barrel than I gave for it, and I'll be anywhere fri>m 250 to 500 dollars ahead. What do you think of that, Mrs. Potts?"

" Where is the 500 dullars oming from? " " From my deal " " What deal? "

" The deal I just told you about" " I haven'tfheard a word abvut a deal, Mr. Potts, i guess you are out of your head this raorning.l don't know what has got into you lately."