LIZA'S OPINION OF THE TOWN BOARD, AND OTHER MATTERS.

Hawera & Normanby Star, Volume I, Issue 16, 5 June 1880, Page 4

LIZA'S OPINION OF THE TOWN BOARD, AND OTHER MATTERS.

TO THE TDITOR OF T'!E STATJ.

Dear Mr. Editor, — As me and my Liza was a taking a stroll t'other night, just to see t' si ghts-o' -Hawera town, Liza she kept a-going slosh through the puddle holes, till she were right down out o' breath, so she pulls up sharp like, and brings me right on my beam ends, and sez she to me, "Now, look here, this slush and mud and little duck-ponds beats Wellington wind and dust into fits. There's my boots and my stockings soaking. Why don't the Town Board get all these holes filled up ?" " Well," sez I, "you know, Liza, the Town Board is a kind a breaking up." " Are they ?" sez Liza, " and I think t' roads is breaking up too." " Don't interrupt me," sez I ; " you see, Liza, when the Board's going to break up, they're afraid that if they do too much, the next fellers that go into it" (" What ! into the mud ?" sez Liza, again interrupting me. " No, Liza," sez I, " into the Board.") « They're afraid that the new fellows '11 have nothing to v do." "Now, look here, Rover," says Liza, "and just mind what I sez, and do it ; if yer don't, yer know what to expect ; yer just set to and write to the newspaper man at the Star, and tell him, with my kind regards, that I hope he'll look out and get some right sort o' men for the next Board," sez she, getting excited and red in t' face. " A lot o' chaps gets put into t' Board, just to show off like, and then they goes about wi' their eyes shut, and don't care a fig whether a poor woman gets her death wi' wet feet or not. And another thing, Rover," sez she, " just ask him if he can tell me what we're a going to do if t' Maoris come down on us one o' these moonlight nights, now all t' volunteers is smashed up. I declare it's somethin' awful to think on't, that we should be left unprotected like this. It seems to me, Rover, that all t' men in Hawera is a-getting awful sleepy-headed like, and a kinder lazy. The place is getting awful dull. What's come o' the Hawera brass band ? We never hears anything on it uow-a-days. And there's no amatoors to go and see. What are all the young chaps a-th inking on, these winter nights, that they do not give us poor women and gals some amusement ? Some on 'em were talking about a Armonic Society, but I reckon it ended in talk. It be all very well for the men to go drinking, and Yankee-gi*abbing, andbilliarding, and all that, while we poor females are left with no amusements whatsomever. It 'ud be a lot better for 'em, and us too, if they'd just statt some music, or something that 'ud please us, and do us some good at the same time."

Now, Mr. Editor, when you comes to know Liza, you'll know that when she once gets on the rampage, it takes somethin' out o' the common to stop her, so you may guess how glad I was to see you a-coming along the street, and as luck had it, Liza she sees you too. Liza gets into a awful fluster when she sees a strauge-looking man, so she gives me a good tug, and sez she, " Rover, who's that gent ?" " That's the newspaper man," sez I. " Laws," sez she, "is it now ? If you writes to him about things, I'm sure he'll see to it, and if he doesn't, I'll have a personal interview wi' him meself, and give him a piece o' me mind." So, Mr. Editor, just be kind enough to oblige Liza, aiid don't risk a personal intex*view, and then you'll oblige — Yours, &c,

Eover. [Liza's communication has been unavoidably held over. — Ed. Star.]