Page 4 Advertisements Column 3

Hawke's Bay Tribune, Volume XXI, Issue 213, 22 August 1931, Page 4 (Supplement)

Then Ho Know.—A man who found early rising difficult bought an alarm clock. At 6 the next morning he was roused by a terrific knocking at his front door. When he opened it he was confronted by a policeman, who exclaimed, sternly: “This won’t do you must not annoy the neighbourhood. Take it inside.’’ And he handed the new alarm clock to its owner. “Ah," said the crestfallen householder. “I wondered how the milkcan came to be at the bedside." A Wash-out —Five-years-old Willy screamed so loud in bed that the nursery maid was sent up to see what was the matter. Soon after he began to scream worse than ever, nnd his father went up to the nursery himself. “Whatever is the matter now?” he said “Mary told me, if I wasn’t quiet, that a big red mouse with green eyes would come and sit on my bed—sir! I’ve screpmed eight times now, and lie isn’t mere yet!" Not Too Reliable.—A young man bought a very old ear. Informing his father of the faet, he said: “1 say dad, boa, soprt. I need one or tw > accessories to complete the ear. Will you give me one!” “Very good.” arid his father, indulgently, “I’ll give you a pedometer. ’ ’ The con laughtefi. “Why.” he scoffed, “you’ve made a mistake. You mean a speedometer. A pedometer measures the miles you walk.” “Yes,” said the father, grimly. “I know that.”