TALES OF THE THIN RED LINE.

Hawke's Bay Tribune, Volume I, Issue 167, 1 July 1911, Page 3 (Supplement)

TALES OF THE THIN RED LINE.

SOME AMUSING EXPERIENCES OF THE LATE SIR WILLIAM BUTLER, D S O. There have been very few men who knew Army life, or had seen its various phases' in so many parts of the world, as did the late Sir William Butler, whose autobiography was recently published by Messrs. Constable. In this volume the grim old veteran relates tales innumerable of his service days—days when the Army was very different to what it is now, and the fighting man had less comfort than he gets to-dny. Here is one of Sir William’s stories of an old major who was serving in the Artillery. The general was holding an inspection, and suddenly paused before one man in the ranks, and said to the major : “Look at that man, sir!” The- major stared at the gunner, but could see nothing the matter, and said so-

“Is it possible sir,” the general exclaimed, “that you can find nothing to coll for observation in the appearance of that man?” The major turned his stony stare again upon the soldier, surveyed him with even a closer scrutiny than before. and then observed : “Well. sir. now that yon have par= ticularly called my attention to this man. I do s-e that he boars rather a strong rc«*niblancc to .an old maiden aunt of mine who lived at Cheltenham when I was a boy ” A NIGHT INVASION. A rather amusing experience is told bv Sir William when on service in the Far West: ‘‘We sl 'pt each night in the cabin of some Red R-'v-r half-breed settler, laying our blankets on the floor in a. row. the .Archdeacon usually having the centre. “One night, near Pembina, the Archdeacon sprang from his couch shouting: “Thov are putting guns t-hrmgh tho window ; they are going to fire.” “A crash of broken glass seemed to confirm his alarm. I caught at the supposed gun-barrel. It was the tail of a cow. “Hie animal had been rubbing the hind part- of lr*r person against tho small window-frame, and her tail had broken the window and our sleep together.” CAUSE FOR D’SCONTENT. The barrack-room “grouser,” it would seem, was just as much in evidence in the ’sixties as he is at present. In those days Aidershot was just a collection of rude wooden huts. Sir William relates :,n an"cdote that happ' ii.wf when his regiment returned there from India. “Our regiment 'lav.’ ax tho expression used to l»e. in the North Camp, and very uncomfortable ‘lying’ it was for all concerned. When’ I'marched the eotnpanv to tho group of huts assigned to us, I heard one of tho men mutter : ‘ ‘Twenty years all round tho worrnld and in a cowshed at the end of it!” A MATTER OE’ FIGURES. Army pilfering would seem to have been a high art in those days, as the following proves: “One night I aas going through the monotonous files when my eyes fell upon this entry. ‘Ono water-cart. £25.’ I was morally certain that I had not given sanction for tho billing of this article. I fancy that the nearest approach to it had been a water-can, price .55., and that an ingenious under-strapper in tho Ordnance- office had changed the words ‘water-can’ into ‘water-cart,’ and made the ss. in the figure column into £25.”

IHE LIGHT THAT DOES NOT FAIL.

The republic of San Salvador Is the "illy government on earth that collects lighthouse fees on account of a volcano that it owns, and without the slightest cost of upkeep. The volcanic beacon is about eight miles inland from the port ot Acaji’tla, and its pillar of cloud by day and ’ its fire sky by night are visible for , many miles out at sea. It bursts forth i every >evcn minutes, and is just as aerurato as any revolving light that y arns mariners of danger in any part of th** world. This volcano has been keeping up this scven-ininutes’ series of eruptions ever since anyone can remember. It is a favourite amusement of visitors to sit by th-* hour during the lazy afternoons, ! and. watch, in hand, to time the erup- * tions till they tire of the occupation ! and fall asleep. No one has ever caught ’ the volcano napping, however! 1 Every vessel that puts in at AcaI jutla has to pay its lighthouse fee. . There is no other lighthouse than the volcano, but that is a sufficient excuse for the Government of Salvador to i make a charge for its sanrinas. 'Bw w-.

“I’ve took the pledge, Bill; I’m never goin’ to touch another drop as long as 1 live.” “Oh, well, cheer up; maybe ye won’t live lo;:"!”