OUR FUNERALS.

Hawke's Bay Herald, Volume 13, Issue 1036, 2 April 1869, Page 3

OUR FUNERALS.

V • ' . L?Vom the V^^i.^z^-I'^l^-Sumptuary laws, have jbeefc . levelled -idlyat the; vanities of life* but we believe ilb&t people might; be b'rcjiiglit^b'' bbw 't#;'tK&Vwillingly did they : "strike; at thejmitiiafpf death. Of all-th'jj'tiikes/^cpmpul'SQi^'pr voluntary, that We have to'pay, ;ia'onejs ho universal br so uncoriiprdmisiiig.'ndne'fails so heavily on the feelings or the puVsei'as that exacted from the living for ttief dead. Pale death, .whether "'■ his impartial^fobt treadß the threshold of the' palace" or^ the hovel , is welcomed every wser6 with; 4he same ghastly and .costly hbnAurs.. :iJ( 7He knocks the prop iof a ;famfly : awayv and tumbles.the, wholetfabric of their^pri^y comforts about their- • > ears; ; * '^drfcH wiin they exhaust the. scanty: 'means 1 ithW'are spared them in a lavish celebration of/ihe doleful event, possibly they' eveji n Hi^tgage for it the charity they will havjb ' to beg inthe future. ; poorV-is compelled by the tyranny* of 'unrelenting custom to parade: itself in'< public',- and ehgagevpaid^mourners and-indifferent^ac-quaintances to./come ahd : play -up* to its reality of anguish; whenj'iiat- obeye'd ftfte dictates of nature* it would cling shrinkingly to solitude. The; whole- fashion" bf our funerals is as repugnant to right'fe&ling / as to common, sense,' and ye;t it is'jiist one of those. fashions, against 'which" it v is hardest to rebel. > You" cannot well j 6ven i to yourself* quietly, speculate on 1 ; the 7 demise of some one dear to you aiwi 'decide on the line.you; shall take when ii'b'ccura. When the event does happen^ you ate but- too glad. to ; let .things' -take- their accustomed course, and hav;e the dismal business over : somehow. It wants- super- : human resolution to come but as' ; a' social reformer in . circumstances f that ! tiy "you so hard. : Besides, it %. an; amial?le!!^;e^kness j and we are glad to believe a%6mrnbn one,. to be painfully sensitive^td"' anything that might.be construed, into ■ia' l^ligM Ifro1 f ro the departed. ' Most people ibav©fre*|afives behind who are troubled' either J by remorse^ and tabse^ whO'-iSre utterly callous must over^ttne'hyWctfte as in duty bound. We-do nbt^opb^fbr impossibilities; or. look foe a. '• sudden Vreiro* lution that shall change things as tneyare to things, as they ought 1 to 1 be. I Undertakers, :we fear, need nave no apprehension that their Tested interests will ; b 0 injuVed by a comprehensive agitation in favour "of rational funeral rites^i or that the'tragjc properties to their trade— palls and plumes and scarfs— will be left on theil* : liaiidsi' or representing nothing more than the value of the materials.. But we -do thin& y t]bkt those whose position and mean's n place them above the .suspicion of; being'jttdnjiated by parsimonious considerations miglit do something towards the relief of their less fortunate neighbour^, 'and vindicate the dignity of genuine grief by" f et;sficning on the hired luxuries of wbe.^' •'^■ i ' :i A reform of this sort ■fro'ula' be;difiicult certainly* ■ but experience shows'.that if ! is nq;t : «>nly, possible but inevitablei : iAYter all, ituan be/only a question of tiifre ! ; it must follow as : a matter of course on 'a change of public feeling, knd publid feeling is amenable; sooner or later, 1 to donimon sense. The day was^ when' a'-Scbfoh funeral was ,a protracted drinking bout, and more of a pretext for jovial .festivity than a christening or a wedding. The mourners were not gened by the'pre'sence of ladies ; the. solemn cause of the gathering was consigned at once to dust and;bslivion, and under the hospitable 'presidency of the nearest relations the/mirth became long and fast arid furious; r Then it would have been regarde&as scandalous disrespect to the departed had'iibTnTs r s6n or his father paid him the tribute' of helpless intoxication ; now 1 the faintest reflection of one of those pleasant gathering^ would be scouted as^an outrage on decency. There was, something to be said; too, ; for the old practice of drowning' sorrow in the bowl, and its excesses might-be ext'enuafed on the plea that hospitality had glided insensibly into debauch. : Bu^'^e cannot conceive a single argument lor paid inures and hired mourners, unless,7ypji}iof)k:at them from the undertaker's pqinjiof view, and plead that one must live and :iet. live even in the presence of death. • Yo]i choose the time when you. are brouglrtii face: to' face with the most solemn and 'certain'bof truths, to act a grave lie and play a grim pantomime, pan there be a morspeyr verted notion of fitting respect to: the deadL than to collect as the i mourneri. at *higf funeral those who have every reason to-re* joice at it? We dare say .undertakers and their men may . often \kpep. themr. selves respectable^and in return for. theit day's wage put on honestly, as a matter iof: business an edifying depression of de.meai nour, just as barristers undertake. a, r ,ques* tionable case; But we' know they 'nave every temptation to Income, disreputable, and that, as a matter of fact, they, are necessarily thelast sort of men that one would wish to see in the house of mourning. Looking at them, one carihoV tielp, thinking of ghouls and hyseinas arid vultures, and all those unclean beings -from the real or my thical fauna of churchyards, <who pick up a cheerful living in the scenes that are most repulsive to the outer world. The thicker the funerals come,, the. more, expensively demonstrative the expressions i of grief, the brisker the trade, the happier they are and ought to be. For theibrief space of a procession through the streets, " we admit their mumming to bo generally admirably sustained, and they earn their wages creditably. But in a drive to a distant suburban cemetery, 1 or down'ta ' i" family vault far away; in the country,perched out of view on the boxes of the ear-' riages, nature will assert itself. Although" the habit of etiquette prevents their jarring ' your ears or grating on - your feelings j'iis";you sit within, with any noisy hilarity, yet all the passers-by can see that they thoroughly enjoy the gloomy picnic. Their ill-suppressed spirits get afresh impulse at the half-way house where you stop to water the horses. And when * the party has reached its destination, the tone of the bulk of; . .the cortege has become so much in harmony with their own that all by consent wear* masks of grief carelessly, only settling:! them on with preternatural solemnity when they chance to catch the eyes of, the chief mourners. The officials go about their work with a light-hearted alacrity. The guests have got into aniniated con* .; versation, having really enjoyed their drive, and a3 they fall into procession twq and two, being unburdened with professional responsibility, and walking behind •; the hosts of the day, they take up then*, "; lively chat where they, left it off when 1 they got out of the carriages. Should 'the M real mourners raise their eyes.by chance , from the grave, they ought; 1» $L •#&£< qomforted by the cheerful airof aft^uf friends, althbugh,^4^6e^ r . '-iheir ■ glance. , . may dash the preyaie^-iwightness, like a LI cloud flitting across /the sun.v > We^ do nat blame the assistants; atall; A man' may 1 ■ be conscious of a shai'p twinge ashe seef/"' a gap made in tfie ranks of Eis' acquaintances, and he may . fe«»l : a sincere if a; passing sympathy; for' the vifctikks of J th'e'| ' : bereavement, but : if is absurd toj'erp^,:, that in his busy life! the/impression rWiil:-!: be more than a fleeting onei Johnson '■'» once crushed the chafttrconsidered appro« p'riate to suchoccasibns with the^uncompromising and overst^ainfed ,diottU.m tSftt no mail eats his dinner^&e.w.Qrse for the loss of his dearest fnenctt; bui assuredly you would bo exacting dio^you expect that; a

week after yo,ur demise yaur acquaintances would be still so profoundly miserable as to take nbY interest in passing incidents and the, topics of the day. It is not your friends iviio are in the wrong, it is those -V who hare- insisted on placing them in a false position. You constrain their attendance to pay a tribute of respect, when you ought to know that, in the nature of things, their behaviour, if it is not abso-. lately 'disrespectful, will be at least quite 'put of keeping with the solemnity of the Occasion. . So far as the well-to-do are concerned -.. themselves, their funeral ceremonies are a mere matter of good or bad taste, and if .they pare to add to the poignancy of their „ grief by ill-timed display and the presence .pffunsympathjsing.on-lookers, their selfimposed pangs are brief if they are sharp. .But their example sways people of nar» rower means, and filtering through class after class, influences society down to its sdepths. There are few more pitiable sights than the. poverty-stricken funerals pi, a great city, where penury is struggling with pretence, and having much '.the best of it. There is the ricketty .structure of mouldering black boards and , worm-eaten cloth, that does duty at once for hearse and mourning coach; the shambling, broken-kneed screw in his appropriately dilapidated trappings ; the pallid .;nunger-drawn faces at the broken win;dows; the shrunken, threadbare cloaks covering the grimy rags j and even then .you have the professional mourner on the . box, wretched and shabby as he is, yefe» much the. sleekest and most respectable of the parly— as if the woe-begone aspeot of tjie turn out and its contents needed any , artificial heightening ; but then his attendance, specially superfluous as it is, isde rigtyewri .Probably, in their anxiety to I& dip w ; hat is right," the family have swept ,ihe contents of their single room into the neighbouring pawnbroker's; run in debt .lip&ras they, could find credit; pledged ,Jfceir precarious work for weeks to come, ,7pn4; perhaps compromised their independence for the iuture. So deep-seated, v ye believe,: is the feeling among the .poorest in favour of funeral pomp that any . . lack of , means to provide it is the one thing •j]stely f ,to draw the purse strings of sym- , pathising neighbours, and the ostentatious displays of the rich* reflected downwards, , lead^e poor of all ranks to pinching and rifpiffwj and ruin. One naturally falls into v^irajn of inflection like this in a sickly -Se^gn, like the present, when distress is .spread bo widely among those who have jjfcnswn r ,^better days, among those who rather starve at home than break ..down, in appearances before the public. \jssjfrju>t the thoughtful philanthropists . who are always ready to put their hands in jtheir purses console themselves under ?^e £ lossßS.that may light on themselves „by conseqrating them to ' the benefit of "Q^ers/ft Might they not set the poor an §?#ss? a*: °nee of economy and' good taste, by devoting to their relief— in ww,m/o>rj^ of the departed-— the money they 'saved, by. sparing their own sorrow the ■pomp and: parade o f professional grief P ; pbrrow; is terribly conservative, because !it 'dreads ty be disturbed, hut surely when a, practice is, utterly revolting to decency ana common sense these must be listened io sooner, or later.

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