TABLE ETIQUETTE.

Hawera Star, Volume XLVIII, 8 December 1924, Page 7

TABLE ETIQUETTE.

for, THE RESTAURANT

A FEW SUGGESTIONS

Many volumes have been published tL SUbject ut Duquette, xor the modest sum. m sixpence or a sink ing one learns how not to precede one s hostess into the dining room, or place kumridP 0n , tlie graild Ln ’ lll ° while anguidly acceptmg the coffee from the T^T d + bUtier l ! U the drawing-room. , ~T e j nts , are > however, obviously intended merely for those lucky haunters wr gl - places and ' marble halls. When- it comes,, to the frequenter of the restaurant, it is sad to think how utterly the author has deemed him unworthy of his best efforts *i^L ref ° re f f 0r u the benefit of simple souls who assaug© the lowly pangs of , hunger in the humble teasriop these few suggestions for correct deportment- are ventured—(a) Hon’t gargle your soup. Although it may be a sign that you are enjoying it. the management may not appreciate, the f r °e adyertisment. Let ■it sneak.,for itself. If it- is not strong enough to hold its oHvn, it is not your affn.ir. (b) Don’t remove your collar when eating asparagus. Remember you are not at home. (c) Don’t shove the lady next door in the ribs with your elbows even if the steak is tough and your knife blunt. Hit the meat, smartly on the table top a few times, remarking pleasantly that the evening are -drawing in. Remember your mother was a women. (d) If you must champ your food audibly, wait until a lorry is passing. The man who succeeds in life is the Opportunist. (e) Don’t cut your spaghetti into short lengths with your nail scissors. This is seldom done now, even in the smartest society. A gentleman of our acquaintance invariably ties his into pleasing little true lovers’ knots—a delicate tribute to the fair sex, which is invariably, -appreciated. (f) Don’t hit your fork against your plate to .attract the waitress. Try rattling the glass of the man: opposite with your walking stick. If you chance to break it, causing his soda and milk to soak through'his trousersi, laugh heartily, remarking, “It looks like rain.” He will he the first xo see the joke: It is thus that true friendships are formed.

(g) Grab everything within your reach. If you can’t reach the cruet, hook it with the crook of your umbrella.

(h) Try brightening up the conversati6n at your table, even if all the other diners are perfect strangers. Tell them about your pet rabbit. A few puns always help. When the waitress asks, “What’s your order please?” square the shoulders and answer breezily; “just an order-inary order.” Poor, overworked lassie, she will appreciate your little pleasantry, and the listeners will simply roar. (i) On leaving the teashop complain loudly about the food. Insist on an apology from the manageress. Make her eat dirE and gravel. Blow smoke in her face as she makes her excuses. This will show the kind of gentleman you are. These will do* for a start. There are many more rules, of course, but if these few suggestions are followed, we should see a rapid improvement in the of our restaurants. In this democratic age it is surprising thaf the diner-out has net had a schedule of conduct drawn up before. Let us hope, it is not too late.