A PLEASANT BEDFELLOW

Grey River Argus, Volume XIV, Issue 1701, 16 January 1874, Page 4

A PLEASANT BEDFELLOW

A new western town, but lately reclaimed from the wilderness, where the houses are few, mean, and ugly ; the streets mud or dust, and trees destroyed, and the geLcval appearance one of poverty struggling with heavy obstacles; where the wolves run the mail in ahead of time, and night is made hideous by a tailor practising on his -flute — this is a good place to get away from. Into such a town as this I once rode on horseback at the end of a weary day. Night had closed in, and T was guided to the hotel by the thousand and one boys of the place, and the noise issuing from the bar-room, no less beastly and disagreeable. I found the landlord shut up in a corner pen, dealing out liquid insanity to his customers. To my request for a supper and bed he replied that I could eat my fill, but there wasnot a bed unengaged or not occupied in the house. I persisted until the wretch informed me that there was a "feller" in No. 6, occupying a double bed, and I could " roll in there" if so minded. It was dismal, but my only hope, so after the evening indigestion I climbed the rough stairs to No. 6. I was told by the landlord to walk in without knocking, and did so. It was a cheerless room, without carpets upon the floor, or curtains to shut out the blank night of the windows that seemed to stare blindly on me,, and winked as the candle flared in the wind. I found my companion measuring off his dreams by snores, and undressing "rolled in" as the landlord had suggested. My stranger turned over with . something between a growl and a grunt as I crept to Ids side. Tired as I was, I could not sleep. The bed-tick felt as if it was stuffed with grasshoppers, and the pillows were the sort ta slip up one's nose in the night and be sneezed out some time during the day. Besides this, my bedfellow snored abominably. Ik sounded like a giant trying to blow Old Hundred through a tin horn, without knowing exactly how. I bore this infliction as long as I could, and at last gave my friend a dig in the ribs, exclaiming at the same time — " I say." "Hillo— oh — what is it?" he asked in a confused way. "I am sorry to disturb you, but I think it my duty to inform you that I walk in my sleep." "Well, walk." "My Christian friend, I am well aware that this is a free country, and if a man wishes to walk in his sleep there is no constitutional provision to prevent me. But I wish to remark that if Ido walk, you had better not interfere with me." "Oh, walk; I won't say a word about it." "Well, don't. When addressed or interfered with lam apt to get furious. I nearly brained a poor man with a dog-iron the other night." "The devil you did!" "Yes I did." "Well, I'll be Wowed? That's rather disagreeable. A fellow might, under an impulse, blurt out something to you." "Better not." "No, I should think not." A long pause followed this. At last the now wide awake lodger asked abruptly — " Did you not notice my hat on the floor!" " I believe I did." "If you walk, you know, I'd rather you wouldn't, Btep on it." " I'll bear that in minjd." After another long pause he again asked"Did you notice that door on the left ?" "I saw a door on the left." " Well, if you walk, I'd advise you not to go jout there. It opens on a porch, only the porch hasn't been built, and it's twe|nty feet down into the stable-yard. " ' ' I d<m't believe 1 Bhall walk out of that door." Don't think I would if I walked much " I supposed my inquisitive friend was dropping into a sleep, when he again broke out — " I say, you did really brain a man with a dog-iron V "I tried pretty hard. " Then came in a silence that was not broken. After a little while I heard ' my bed-fellow creeping softly from the other side of the bed. I could hear him feeling about for his hat and clothes. Then I had the satisfaction that the door had closed softly on my retreating tormentor. I rolled over and slept the sleep of innonence. The next morning, on descending to breakfast, I found an old friend seated at the table. We had not met for years. After a cordial greeting, I said : — "Are you stopping here?" "1 have been trying. But lam nearly dead I slept on a bench in the bar-room amid a lot of drunken brutes, who sang Bingo for wages of drink all night." * ' Couldn't you get a bed V " Yes, I had a double bed to myself, when that stupid ass of a and lord sent up a crazy fellow, who walked and struck out with dog-irons." " Good heavens, Gillepsy, was that you?" "And you don't mean to tay that you. served me that infernal trick ?" It was a case that called for diplomatic explanation. — Mark Twain.