Change Your Personality!

Greymouth Evening Star, 26 January 1929, Page 9

Change Your Personality!

It Can be Done, Says WellKnown Psychologist, but it Takes Time — And Perseverance.

r z Z - > \ UUIETY is in a chaotic state lo ' rtay ’ because WW' people have not learned the art of living together,” says Dr. John B. Watson. “ Everywhere there are evidences of friction. In the home as well as in the business world.

“Thousands of youngsters suffer from neuroses and complexes. They are unhappy with their parents. Innumerable marriages go to pieces. Countless men and women cannot get along with their business associates and fail in their jobs'

“A nice picture of modern life, isn’t it? And why does such a condition exist? Simply because human beings are unable to co-operate and to live harmoniously with each other. “Just think how much more the average person would get out of life if instead of going to school and learning to be proficient in Latin and geometry and other comparatively inconsequential subjects, he would learn how' to get along wit!) people.

"There are schools and instructors for every conceivable subject—law, banking, sports, driving a car, flying an airplane but for the knowledge that would bring us the greatest umouiit oi' happiness, living harmoniously with one’s mate, one’s children, and one’s business associates —there are no teachers.” Dr. Watson is considered one of the most brilliant psychologists of the day. He once experimented on 500 infants and evolved his theory of behaviourism, a theory which has changed the whole course of psychology. Briefly it is :h;it our fundamental instincts and emotions are not inherited but acquired cr built in after birth. His theory of behaviourism is regarded as one of the most important of the day because it points the way to a better and happier type of individual than the world has yet known.

Faulty Emotions

Questioned as to the chief causes of friction in the occupational side of life, Dr. Watson said: “Faulty emotional organisation is at the root of the trouble. People get their feelings hurt very easily. They weep, or they get angry. They are shy, sensitive or afraid to tackle new jobs. “They are lazy, they don’t want to accept responsibility or they feel that they don’t get enough money for their work. Men and women don’t learn to be objective in business They are thin-skinned. They take everything so personally that they cannot get along with their business associates or their employers and they consequently hinder their own progress in business. “Women are particularly supersensitive. It is almost impossible to criticise a woman. One must always be careful of her feelings. Let an employer tell a stenographer that her letter isn’t exactly right and she may immediately give way to a paroxysm of weeping. The probabilities are that she will not turn up the next morning. She has to remain at home for a day in order to recuperate from the shock of her employer’s unjust criticism.

“It is also more difficult for women to work together peaceably. They quarrel on the slightest provocation and they tend to be jealous of each other.

“These bad emotional habits of people which cause so much friction are due to the home training they have received. Mothers coddle and caress their children to death when

they are small. They rear them like hot-house plants. “Mother makes everything easy for them. She shiedds them from wounds, privation and humiliation. She helps them tp fight their battles and she stands .between them and danger. She lightens their tasks and surfeits them with pleasure and luxuries.

Choosimg a Vocation

“When the time comes for the young man to choose a vocation, we find that he is not' hardened for work. He wants a job that is comfortable and soft, and he wants his superiors to treat him the way his own parents treat him. He wants to be encouraged, praised and helped. He has not been taught to face life, meet its exactions and cope with its problems. “The man who wants to achieve success in business and who finds that he is unable to work with others, must take himself in hand and get himself to do it. If necessary, he should try to change his personality. “The average person thinks of personality as some vague, mysterious power with which one is born. But that is not so. Personality can be built into each and every individual. It is nothing more than the sum total of our habits. The man, therefore, whose habits are of such a nature that he cannot work harmoniously with other people, should change his personality. It can be djone.

“But.” Dr. Watson explains, “there is no trick or pill that will change personality in a short time. The person first has to unlearn all the habits which have heen built in from childhood and then start to learn new ones.

“To do this,” says the psychologist, “he should change his job, his environment and his friends. It his reading consist, of tht> cheap magazine and books, he should cultivate the habit. of reading the better type of periodicals. if he is shy and awkward hi expressing himself, and if his English is poor, ho should take up the study of languages. AU this takes considerable time and unless one possesses a good deal of ambition and initiative. it is difficult to do alone.

“Perhaps some day we shall have hospitals devoted to helping us change our personalities, because they can be changed as easily as the ffiiape of the nose. Then, too, it will be possible for people to learn something of the art of living together. Ten Good Rules “Another cause for friction is the fact that our young men want to be financial successes too quickly. They aren’t willing to start low on the ladder, accept, a small salary and work hard for a number of years until they are worthy of more money.” The following ten commandments for success in business summarise Dr. Watson’s opinions on the subject: 1. Don’t be thin-skinned. Try to get along with people. 2. Don’t over-specialise. Learn the collateral lines of your business. 3. Don’t try to be president without first learning what the office has to do.

4. Don’t be afraid of working overtime.

5. Don’t marry too soon. Lay the foundation of your career first. 6. Don’t be airaid to dress well.

7. Don’t use slang. Learn to use correct English. 8. Don’t talk too much. 9. Don’t talk too loudly. 10. Don’t get the reputation, while young, of being a boozer, a gambler or a “fast” man. You will have plenty of time to do these things after you have established yourself.

It is Dr. Watson’s opinion that many of the causes of friction in the occupational side of life also hold true in matrimony.