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Greymouth Evening Star, 2 May 1917, Page 2

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A Scottish parish minister met the laird's gamekeeper one day mid said to him: "I say, Davidson, why is it I never see you in church ?" "Well, sir," replied Davidson, "I don't want to hurt the attendance." "Hurt the attendance! What do you mean P" asked the. minister. in surprise- " Well, sir, you see," replied the gamekeeper," "there are about a dozen ijien in the parish that go to elutrch when I'm not there who would g'o poaching if I went to church." The kindergarten had been p+udying the wind all the weekits power, effect, etc.—until the subject had been pretty well exhausted. To stimulate interest the kindergartner said, in her most enthusiastic manner: "Children, as I came to school to-day in the trolley-car,, the door opened and something came softly in and kissed me on the cheekWhat do you think it was?" And the children joyfully answered, ''The conductor!" The famous physician and the eminent clergyman were deep in a discussion which threatened to become acrimonious. "You see," Paid the minister sarcastically, "you medical men know so much about the uncertainties- of this world that I should think you would not want to live-" "Oh, I don't know," responded the physician caustically- "You clergymen tell us so much about the uncertainties of the next world that we don't want to die-"