BY THE WAY

Evening Star, Issue 20558, 9 August 1930, Page 2

BY THE WAY

[By Q.r;

'* The time has come,” the W*lra» a»id, “ To talk of many things.” Considering the number and nature of our population, it is astonishing how many artists of the front rank we have had the privilege of seeing and hearing. The first that we can remember was a violinist named Remenyi, who found his way here in the very dim past. He had a marvellous instrument, a genuine Strad.—it was believed—from which he extracted the music of the spheres .or at least a very good imitation. By birth he was a Hungarian gypsy, and the legend ran that, after spending half the year in playing in London, Baris, Berlin, New York, or Dunedin, ho would hasten back to Hungary, put his dress clothes into cold storage for six months, and rejoin his kinsmen in their simple and not ovcrdionest life. Ho was, if memory serves us as it ought, drowned in a shipwi eck off Madagascar, and what now seems even more regrettable, his Strad. was lost with him. Since his day practically all, or at tho least a majority, of the great musicians, as well as a large number of eminent actors and actresses have called on ua. It seems to be a point of honour with them to see New Zealand before they die. Some of them have cut it pretty fine, but most of them got here. The very latest;, Backhaus, has just paid his second visit, and we hope that ho was gratified by the crowded audiences which greeted him and the enthusiasm of their greeting. Unlike the lady who “ could not afford not to go,” we could and did, contenting ourselves with putting_ his rendering of the famous * Bridge Nocturne ’ in six flats and an attic or two on the gramophone while we read a detective yarn till bed time. We admit, however, that the loss was ours.

Suppose I went to Russia one line day—--1 wouldn’t go to-day because it s wet, And, thank the Lord, I haven t been there yet Because I hate the place—but, anyway. Suppose I went prepared to think and say . The optimistic thing, the thing that s kind. Without a hint of bias in my mind, { wonder what I’d find To captivate my soul and make me stay ?

Some budding Communists a while ago Were shown the place, and voted it “ all right ” (Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings quite A lot of undigested praise can flow). They knew whatever they were • meant to know, And saw whatever they were meant to see, As portions of a long extended spree, Returning full of glee, To set their little comrades’ hearts aglow.

But things that thus consolidate the views Of kids —and Communistic kids to boot— Are not infallibly the things that suit Unprejudiced inquirers on a cruise _ To find out truths and give old Nick his dues; In case, by any chance, they find he’s not . As black as the, proverbial chimney \ P°t. : An honest seeker’s got To know what information he can use.

And so, ns I shall never with my eyes Behold the country of the Soviet (Which statement isn’t made with much regret), I’ll let them—Communists or otherwise— Abuse it or extol it to the skies, As other chaps conceivably might do With Yuco-Slavia. Greenland, or Peru, Or Spain or Timbuctoo (Our facts are facts, and yours are mostly lies).

I shouldn’t like to be a Muscovite, Or see one either, on his native heath, Because (I may be wrong) I’ve got a breath Of horrible suspicion which in spite Of all mv breadth of vision grips mo tight (Excuse mixed metaphors) and makes me feel Tho terrors of a scanty, meatless meal. These might not be the real Conditions ruling there, but still they might.

They say (and Labour has a right to speak) The country’s full of light and life and hope, For any man who doesn’t think of soap More frequently than every seventh week. Of course, this may be quite inaccurate; If anybody had the fearful cheek To make ablutions daily, then his fate Would be, at any rate, A swinging sentence from the local beak.

Of course, as I remarked, it’s only fair To say that apprehensions of this sort Are merely based on rumour and report About tiie country—and, as you’re aware, I haven’t, (thank my lucky stars!) been there To get these yarns aforesaid verified. But st : ll, while meat and soap are well supplied Right here, i’ll keep outside The country of the Bolshie and the Bear! • • » • Two interesting cables reached us this week, the first being to the effect that Uncle Sam has decided (apparently voluntarily) to scrap three of his battleships, considering that the political prospects justify him in reducing his sea strength to this extent. We say “ voluntarily,” and there is little doubt that such is the case. Uncle generally and rightly resents suggestions from others regarding his domestic affairs, and few nations would have the temerity to offer any. Without in any way seeking to belittle what seems to bo the most genuine “ gesture ” in tho cause of peace up to date, it may ho said that what might ho perfectly safe for him to do might not be at all safe for us to do. Nevertheless it is a verv notable decision, and one which reflects great credit on Uncle, no matter wha+may come of it. The other matter was that the Cunard Company have taken up tho chaljenge thrown down by the Germans with the Bremen and the Europa, and purpose building one and perhaps two monsters of 75,000 tons, which will put all vessels afloat definitely in tho background. lf_ the in crease in the size of ships continues, it might be possible some day to make most of the Atlantic crossing by foot, hopping from the stem of one steamer to tho stern of another, though at first, there might be difficulties in matters of detail, such as luggage and so forth As in the case of the Lusitania and Mauritania, the Government will assist

financially. At the worst the building of these leviathans will give a lot o* much-needed employment, not to mention the manning of them when thev are built. * * * » Eureka 1 We have found it. Wo know when, how, and why the murder was committed, and when tho body was dumped into the stormwater drain at St. Kilda, and what the officials at the pumping station said when thev found it, and that the gentle blue eyed maiden who was seen pointing a revolver at the deceased had no intention of shooting him, but w*as merely rehearsing her part in the forthcoming Girls’ High School pantomime. This is the proper way to begin. It rouses your curiosity. Now for the mystery. Every time we have visited Christchurch we have been conscious of a subtle difference between that city and Dunedin; a difference appreciable but undefinable. In Chr.stchurch life does not seem to be quite such a serious business as elsewhere. There is a feeling of springtime in the air. We should not he surprised if a livelier iris came upon the burnished dove a week or so earlier there than it does further south. D you ask a Christchurch man for a match he seldom regards you as one of the undenvorld. Adherents of the different religious bodies in Christchurch have been known to admit without prejudice that members of sects other than their own may have a sporting chance of getting to heaven, and that on earth they are not altogether vik* The very motorist who knocks vou down will say, “ Sorry, old chap,” instead of inquiring who will pay for Ins damaged mudguard. _ Now_ we know the reason for all this. Listen! The three and a-half million bottles of whisky, brandy, rum, gin, and so on. which are annually consumed in the dominion are to he bottled in Christchurch, where tho artesian water is the best in New Zealand for the purpose W« do hope they will not overdo the water. • a • * ■ » When Edwards staged a wrestling bout with Thye, And Thye, of course, performed the like with Edwards, It seemed that one at least would finish by Retiring with a battered aspect bedwards. The outcome of such Herculean scraps, For glory of the combat and for money, Quite frequently disfigures hefty chaps, As Heeney found on finishing with Tunney.

But boxing is a delicate affair, A nice and gentlemanly way of fighting. It doesn’t suit red-blooded crowds, who care For something far more virile and exciting. The “ ipse dixit ” of the referee Is law except for hoots of disapproval ; And no one thinks that gentleman should be Subjected to a forcible removal.

The upper cut, the jab, the kidney punch Are far too mild for up-to-date spectators, Who like the stirring sound of hones that crunch Beneath the grips of spinal dislocators. The teeth (as Lewis Carroll says) that bite, The daws that catch and lacerate the muscles, ■ ■ • ' ■ ■•■■■■ The thumbs that gouge are features that excite ■: '. The fans that watch our new Homoric tussles.

So when (as I remarked when I began) ■ Tho Thye and Edwards bout had been proceeding A little while, each optimistic fan Was looking forward to a little bleeding. They thought they wouldn’t take it quite amiss If both contestants wrestled “ con amore ” ... To see each wrestler make his vis-a-vis (Excuse the rhyme) unutterably gory.

They got their fun all right. To bo quite strict Tho battle (so to speak) out-Homered Homer. The referee was well and truly kicked, Subsiding in a happy state of coma; And then the wrestlers started, tooth and nail, In joyful and hilarious abandon To fight the battle of the great Hemnle, And/ tear at every limb they got a hand on.

And then a sort of Donnybrook arose. The audience, moved with . pleasure undiluted, Collectively and singly came to blows. They bumped and smote and tore and swore and booted, All feeling that this gay and hearty sort Of social and communal rough-and-tumble Concluded a delightful day of sport Without the least occasion for a grumble.

For N.S.C. just stands for “no such code,” And Queensberry is long ago departed; Tho latest style, like Topsy, simply “growed,” With holds unregulated and uncharted. Catch-as-catch-can we’ll never see again, Or Cumberland or even GrrecoRopmn> For good old Rafferty resumes his reign— Just play “ Kilkenny Cats and care for no man. « K- * ■» The Dunedin Presbytery, speaking through the mouth of Dr Merringron. has once more expressed its strong disapproval of art unions, and on the whole wo agree with the grave and reverend gentlemen. During the past few months there have been far too many art unions, some of them for objects in which we are not directly interested. Why are these gambles called “ Art Unions?” They do not seem to he either artistic or united in anv ordinary sense of the words. They owe their popularity to the - deeply rooted desire of most men to /ct a lot for a little, which is tho wellspring from which issues so much trouble. It, w!*s wisely pointed out by a Scotch divine lotiig ago that gambling is one o) these awful sins one loses money by. Our own personal opinion is that it is a greater evil than drink, and causes more suffering to the innocent. . It would bo interesting to know how much cash is squandered every year in this Small dominion in the illusory hope that it will ho returned ten, twenty, or a hundredfold. The Government’s revenue from racing alone is a very substantia! sum. The only defence of betting we ever read was in one of George Aloore’s novels, in which he contended that it was the only thing which brought a gleam of hope, or romance, to tho drab lives of the very poor, and we are nots sure but that is a very

sound imminent. Tt may be urged, however, that nil life is more or less n tram bln that the race is not to the swift. n~r the battle to the strong. The hardworking thrifty youth is finite liable to end bis days in a benevolent institut’on, while the idle, dissolute ■>nnrertico mav find a cold mine while loafing in the sun. The churches themselves are concerned with the Ivggesu gamble of all. “ the great Perhaps. ’