CASUAL COMMENTS

Evening Star, Issue 19724, 26 November 1927, Page 2

CASUAL COMMENTS

UHSOfJFIRiED RUMORS [By Leo Fanning.] Of course the vast majority of rumors are’unconfirmed, because they are concorned with rather delicate or intricate —yea, may it even be said “ intriguing « ’’—personal matters. Attempts to confirm many of these rumors would greatly increase the world’s production of black eyes, battered' noses, and broken sconces. iu * * * Years ago . it was believed that the unconfirmed rumor passed on through the town in “ strictest confidence had a bigger run among women than men; but it in rumored that as femininity lias become a little more masculine in outlook, and masculinity to-day has feminist tendency, it would need a double Royal Flush .Commission of extraordinary power and courage to determine which sex is the busier creator or distributor of unconfirmed rumors. •-« « » Many thousands of journalists the world over remember the_ lure of the unconfirmed rumor in their early days of reporting. How rosy it looked on the wild tree! Whata fruity thing to hand to the public! The editor had given the traditional warning: “When in doubt, leave out.” The young- Sherlock Holmes had tried hard to find out, but it was not possible to clear away every speck of uncertainty. • So, after much cogitation, he decided to chance it. . . . “One more wild shot like that,” the editor, said next day,- sternly, almost fiercely,:“ and you may look for another job. This is a solid, respectable newspaper office—not a gambling saloon.” * * # Barbers’ shops-nave been blamed as the sources and spreaders of many unconfirmed rumors, but the full responsibility must not bo thrust upon the barber. - If. customers could sit about smoking in grocers’ shops, waiting for their turn, those mild places would nave their share of the wild rumor business, ( but not so much as the barbers’ boudoirs, where the atmosphere is more - conducive to gossip. The barber, as the | recipient of the city’s chat, simply passes it on to successive occupants of : the chair. . # # & The modern hostess, eagerly seokinga new way to amuse her guests at a big 1 party, could try a competition in uucon- . finned rumors, in affairs personal, , social, political, national, and interna- j tional, with prizes for the best and , worst fabrication. As a help for pros- ‘ pectivo participants in such contests, ; this commentator offers a few new-made ! rumors. Not the slightest attempt has j been made to confirm any of them. * ♦ * <¥ I As the weather has been off-sidey in . many parts of the dominion since the ! clock was put on, Mr T. K. Sidey ad- j uniting regretfully that the daylight is not worth saving, is moving for a repeal of Ids rash Act. w « * * Mr M'Combs, M.P., has decided, after all, not to burn, publicly, his old books on arithmetic, but will destroy them privately instead, and secretly buy another set. He has offered to coach the Government Statistician, the Secretary of the Treasury, the AuditorGeneral, and the Commissioner of Taxes in new aspects of “How many beans make five” and the variations in the sum of two and two, according to circumstances over which politicians'may, or may not, have control. Mr M‘Combs will bo soon publishing books on ‘ The Cube Roots oTPolitical Situations] and . * The Psycho-analysis of Statistical Surds.’ His now algebraic symbols will bo sent on to the schools ns patterns for the girls’ crewel work. His friends will not be surprised if lie is knighted for bis masterly treatise on ‘ The Ninepoint Circle in the Marketing of Onions,’ which amazed the Old World

and the New. Mr M'Combs has not shown any diminution of modesty since the Diploma of Arithmetic was conferred upon him, but—(well, we won’t go into that). * # * * Several iradc unions, in hearty sympathy with the difficulties and problems of certain manufacturing industries, have applied to the Arbitration Court for decreases of wages. When this nows was broken to the president of the Employers’ Federation ho did not have a tit—he had several. “Let Jem all come,” he said, on recovering from his Jirst-aid treatment. * * * * Auckland has admitted that Wellington is the nobler and lovelier city. “ We’ve known it all along,” the Mayor of Auckland confessed to an interviewer, “ but we thought it well to avoid giving Wellington cause for conceit. However, we’ve decided to toss in the old pretence about the Queen City, ami acknowledge Wellington’s supremacy in everything, except quantity of population. No, I’m not standing for election again.” »' * * * The new political party (the United Alphabet or Letter Box) will publish its personnel next Whitsuntide or Michaelmas (at the latest). The names are in the box all right, but are sticking in the slots. m 4 * * On lst_ April, 1928 (leap year), women will cease to be swayed by fashion’s decrees for dress or hair. Each will go her own gait, as fancy listeth. This will be part of the feminist revolt against man’s dictatorship of women’s fashions in Paris and elsewhere. As this individualism will double or treble the cost of dressing, the Society for the Protection of Men is sending'a deputation to the Government to protest emphatically against the startling innovation. “No stone, brick, log, or sandhill will he left unturned in our movement against tiie increase in the costly decrease of dressing,” said the society’s president. ■ * ♦ * In 1928 no issue of the Government 'Gazette’ will contain more than live dozen whereases and two dozen repetitions of the full name, titles, and decorations of His Excellency the Go-vernor-General. a * * * Bruno-bloudes will bo favored in the new matchmaking .for the Prince of Wales. It is not true that the licenses of 1 lie gnessers have been cancelled; tlicv have been only endorsed. The prophets are free to sort out another hundred names of eligible or possible parties. The new eruption of interest in matrimony for the Prince of Wales will break out just after Christmas. $ * * *

Sir' -—— (well known as a. lifelong enemy of tobacco, strong meat, and strong drink) lias been seen in broad daylight smoking a, cigarette and carrying "a half-haten meat-pie in one ban cl and a suspicious-looking bag in the other. When tactfully _ interviewed by a newspaper man, Sir ——• laughed heartily. “ You thought I was forsaking or betraying my principles,” he chuckled.- “ I’m strengthening them. After tasting and testing the horribleness of these things I’ll be able to denounce them more thunderously than over.” *>* * * ■ Hank dorks aro to he allowed to wear fed ties and work in their shirt sleeves on hot days_ (assuming that Mr Sidey’s statutory Summer Time will really; turn up).

Mussolini, in private life, is very mild and timid. He accepts dictation front his youngest child, and, us for ordering his wife .about, well—it is stated on credible authority—the mere thought of it would put the “ duco ” in a deuce of a cold sweat. When ~'Mrs Mussolini was asked whether the Dictator ever dictated at home, sho said nothing, but looked a lot. « # >i< # Only 80 per cent, of neyt year’s extra-super-features of the “movies” will have a box-office interest in the “ sex appeal.”