FLASHES 0F FUN

Evening Star, Issue 18339, 28 July 1923, Page 17

FLASHES 0F FUN

Yank (in London, dapping total stranger on back) : “ Say, Bo——” Total Stranger t “ 80. a •» fe “Did Withorbes get over Ms operation?’’ " No, ho is stfll talking about it.” Shop Assistant: “ Here’s a material, Mira, that speaks for itself.” Young Lady i “ Oh, I don’t want anything quite so loud as that!” * * Hr * “ Darling,” ho said, “ I love you. Time is short. I leave to-night. Is my suit worth pressing?” He paused, trembling, and waiting for her answer. “ I don t know,” was the girl’s reply. “ Your trousers are a bit baggy at the knees, but your coat seems passable.” ft Tho children were having a Bible lesson on Noah and tbo Flood. Tho teacher asked how did they think Noah would fill in his time? “Ho wud llsh," said ono little urchin, “but ho W’udna’ fish lonm” “ How la that f” said the teacher. “ Because ho wud only her twa worms,” was tho reply. a £• <i a “ May I accompany you across tho street, madam© f” asked the small Boy Soout of a- frail-looking old lady. “ Certainly, my little man/’ eaid_ tbo motherly soul. “ Have you been waiting long for someone to take you across?” & # # « Bobby (whispering) : “Didn’t I hear Clara toll you, Mr Feathcrly, that sho was sorry, but she really couldn't give you a lode of her hair?” Mr Feathcrly i “ Sh, Bobbyl—or—yes,” Bobby : “ Well, yqu must wait a day or two, and I’ll get some for you when she’s out.” » # # # “ At an agricultural show in Dublin a pompous member of Parliament, who arrived late, found himsolf in tho outskirts of a hugo crowd. Being anxious to obtain a good view, and presuming that he was woil known to the spectators, hs tapped a man on tho shoulder, and ordered : “ Make way there!” “Gam! Who are ye push in’?”, was the unexpected reply. “Do you know who I am, sir?” cried tho indimant M.P. “ I’m a representor tiv© of the peoplo!” “Yah!” growled tho other; “but wo’re tho bloomin’ peoplo themselves,”

j A farmer onoo came into a tavern with I eggs to sell The landlord agreed to take 1 two dozen, and when the fanner counted | over the contents of the basket he found I that ho had twenty-five «rgs. Tins land--1 lord wanted the extra egg thrown in. j The farmer failed to see the equity of the i proposal, and the matter was discussed j for come time. j At last tho landlord said ho would take 1 tho twenty-five eggs, give the man a drink, and call it “ square.” The farmer agreed, and pocketed nls money. “ Now, what’ll you "have?” asked the landlord, j “Sherry and egg!” said the farmer. * «- * * The colored preacher began his sermon I with : “ Ercddern and sistem, when do fust man, Adam, was created, bo was made outer wet clay, and set up’gainst § the plains to dry." A dissenting member of the congregation arose and said : “ Pawsin, if Adam was da first nun, don who all made de palius ? ’ ’ "Bra’cr Simpkins, sot down,” said the parson, disgustedly, “ secli fool questions as youm would upset any system of theoloibcft*’