THE PERFECT OFFICIAL

Evening Star, Issue 16777, 4 July 1918, Page 6

THE PERFECT OFFICIAL

(AS THE PUBLIC WANT HTMS. I.—THE BOARD OF INTENTION AND RESEARCH. [By Diox Clayton- Caltheop, in London ' Daily News.'] "Sir.'' gays the charming office girl, "them is a man calling himself an in- ! venter who waits below. "An inventor I" cries the groat scientist. "And below! Pray request him to come up at once." Wreathed in smiles and nibbing hi? hands with glee, the great scientist, world renowned, awaits his visitor. To him enters the. seediest individual in the vrorld. exhaling an aroma all his own. "This is indeed a pleasuie.' says the great scientist. " Pray be seated. " I sec you have the forethought to call at 1.50. In these days luncheon is a trifle. I perceive that you smoke, allow me to oiler you a really choice cigar." The_ inventor seats himself, not without surprise ; files the cigar in his breast pocket for future reference, and lights a .Tuublful pipe, the painful wheezes of which briny an air of Bohemia into the office. "You have, doubtless, some great idea." says the great scientist, with the tact for which he is noted. "If you could spare me. a few rcarr.cuts ," begins the inventor. "My dear sir:" exclaims the great scientist. "I am your servant. It is true that I have a steak of salmon waiting me at the club, but that, in war time, is of no consequence. Pray proceed." "1 have, indeed," says the inventor, wiping a moist eye with the merest fur a handkerchief, "an idea which will bring this war to an end." "My dear friend," says, very gracefully, the treat scientist, "in case you should feel embarassed, let me. hint to yon thai such an ilea as I think yours may prove is nit we seek." " The common or vulgar rabbit ,'" th-" inventor begins. "They have such beautiful eyes," says the- iireat scientist. "Multiplies very quickly," says the inventor. "It's progeny is large and frequent. They burrow," he adds, darkly. "How true!" says the great scientist. " I see you to be a man of great observation." " 'H--. ordinary puppy dog ." says the in\ ntoi* ' ] jo i it' tul Im.d" hs tip c t -n * el 1 kro\ n lo' hj - 1\ ( t i m s \\ 11 cim 'l J er-, -i -i-ide iVt tai a ' *a)* tto imenter j \ : <l t <- } ih t i a t•% t> u « it *t «li V \ b i * be i 1 r, 1 \\ ( i fol mtr po n ?i> 1] t n_ ' '-tv- the i\cntoT run hj enci nid \\ i irr 1 i) j oi* <ij j a hup i t n 1 \r i ' \\ 1 \ nt "ide d r acd 1 t - i e 1 »n l "i, e." i _ <] -p te i mis f near fi. ij bell. " Why rr.t replace them by animals?" cries tV inventor. "Now you that I arrive at my point." Hastily mopping his brow with a hnridk'rihi f of nure cambric, the t'toat scientist press;s a glass of sh-riy on tlu inventor ami bezs to bo *%\ciise<i for takinj- cue hhi.-eif. "The labbit. F repe r t, burrow*," says the inventor. "Ho will go far in F"a"ch of watr. With salt atMed to his cabbseo he will pet very thirsty. A tunnel !"' t'"iuvuif r c'-;-'- almost, if not quite bosid» himself. T' i in a hoarse whisper ho breathes the ■ ords "The Rhine'" "Pr'y i-'itiiiuV says the treat unable to beFeve' bis ea-s. "J'iT'l by thirst and loni'ins for watoi ten rabbits will do n:i-> i"ar's "<»■'- If. shall v.o say. 10.(XX) men .->re now omploycd on minmc operations <~n {}.-■ "•< it. \vl y not or- t.-ni ; im--.s that numb r of thirst-mad rabbits, who will in no timo ir-.ke n tunm 1, •••'!'!!!• -it pick or -hr.vfd. far behind tii« lila-s of the luu-mv."

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