MUSICIANS ON "BIKES"

Evening Star, Issue 9775, 3 August 1895, Page 2 (Supplement)

MUSICIANS ON "BIKES"

" Oriel," the clever contributor to the ' Argus,' thus rhythmically chronicles a slight accident to one of our old Dunedin friends :

When, the other day, we observed no less eminent a musician than Herr_Benno Scherek stealthily, and with palpable precaution, enter a ladies' drapery emporium, and emerge with a look of conscious guilt, and a parcel bearing a suspicious resemblance to a packet of safety-pins, we confessed that we diagnosed of nothing more serious than some trifling domestic commission. It was not till later that the full horror of the discovery burst upon us. Those pins were not intended for their. legitimate, may we say their innocent, uses. The ultimate destination was the extremities of Mr Scherek's fashion-ably-cut trousers, for, yielding to the popular craze, he has been rash enough to invest*in what the makers, with a fine sense of sarcasm, have christened the "Safety ' bicycle. It may be that our leading pianist is inspired by the ambition .common among musical artists of being able to play on, or with, anything—do we not remember another distinguished member of the guild who, having in the small . hours of the morning given expression to the same boast, was confronted with a cartridge - filler, from which, mistaking it for some new kind of musical instrument, he actually did produce certain lugubrious notes ? But we can ill afford to have all our familiar musicians bitten by the same mania, and we shrink from the spectacle of Herr Plock solemnly bestriding a Dunlop, or Signor Zelman, in smoking cap and knee-breeches, sprinting along the St. Kilda road, a3 will certainly be the case if this pernicious example is to set the fashion. Mr Scherek is doubtless very proud of his new machine; but at this late hour we believe we have no necessity to tell him that pride goes before a fall.

Let us hymn the consequences of ambition's fatal

•sway, O'er a popular musician whom we meet with every day; He hail talent, fume, position, hosts of friends that wished him well; But he hadn't got a cycle, so he purchased one—and fell. Oh ! Benno on the bike, boys ; see him homeward jog; Thinks it's just as easy as falling off a log. Won't the people wonder ; won t they all admire Mr Benno Schcrck on his patent Huinbcr tire.

So they placed him in the saddle, and thev lingered by his side, While his noble chest expanded with a pardonable pride; And he paddled on tho pedals with a calm familiar

airTill he suddenly discovered the attendant wnsn' there.

ThenSudden fit of frenzy, sudden loss of nerve. Unexpected waggle, wild and frantic swerve ; Brief aerial journey, deep and galling ire, Bitter pang of parting from a patent Humber tire.

Allegretto, a<jituto, through the universe he flew, Crying poeophi lento, moderato, all he knew ; Like a fugue that unexpectedly has gone upon the bend Down a roadway paved with scherzos, with a coda at the end. Woa-.- " Benno off the bike, boys; watch him as he dies ; Con exprewione upwards to the skies ; Then, appassionato, heaping in his ire Demi-semi-iiuavers on his patent Humber tire. Till a raiiing's stern ritartlo stopped the music with a jar, And he sat down on tho kerbstone, and he counted every bar, r v^'*i^%a And the last of Mr Scherek we were privileged to see He was busily engaged upon a ' Reverie in D.' Oli! Benno wandered home, boys; led the bike along, Encores not permitted, programme quite too long. Means to stick to uiusic, never more aspire To paralyse creation on a patent Humber tire.