POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXXVIII, Issue 83, 5 October 1944, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

I In the end it'll be Deutschlandl ; unter alles. • , ■■■"'. NEMESIS. * * * . A newspaper correspondent is look* ing for a "cure for blushing." ShG , should join a political party—so sayS "Public Opinion." * ' » . * Man asked R.A.F. officer how jefe» propulsion plane worked. "Easy,"'was the reply. "It just sucks itself along like a vacuum cleaner." . * * *■ Blue eggs, laid by the offspring of five speckled chickens, have been • shown at Cheltenham (England). The * hens differ from ordinary birds only} in the; shape of the head, which resembles that of a pheasant. ■ * ■ *,'■"» ■ • , While far below me crawl in -clay? and clod Sublimely I shall stand along withl I • God. x MARY S. LEITCH. The Summit, Mount Everest. «■ «• * \ - REAR ACTION. ' Although it was getting late, thes lovers still lingered in the shadowy hall of her ancestral mansion. It was obvious she was pleading with him. about something, but in vain. "It's no use, darling," he said in a broken voice; "I simply can't face your father to ask him for your hand." "You needn't be frightened of facing; him, dear," replied the girl, coaxingly., "The great danger is when you turn your back." Contributor: A.X.V. •& * ♦ HITLER'S HOLDING. How many Suez shares are privately? held by Italian owners is difficult ta estimate, because dividend warrants from Axis countries naturally hava not been cashed since the • war. Oni. the other hand,"it is known that twot years, ago the German Government bought up big packets of shares in! Paris, Lyons, and Marseilles in order to obtain ultimate control of the canal*. ', Whether Hitler, on whose personal be» [ half the shares, were bought, intended .to make a present of them to his friend and ally Mussolini, or to keep*", them as a nest-egg for himself, ha* not been- made known. 1 - ■*-. -' . * - * BEWARE. A notice on the, garden wall of 4 „ house at Bray, County Dublin, reads. "Beware .of the Hydrangea." The resi* dent, an old sea captain, had been an* noyed by boys playing football. Every time they kicked the ball into the garh den and climbed over the fence they trampled on his flowers. After he put up the notice he had no further trouble, the youngsters believing that hy* drangea was the name of a snake. ' Similarly, an American farmer has kept trespassers from his hazel-nut bushes. A botanist told him the tech-* nical name of the hazel, and he put up the following sign: "Trespassers take warning. All persons entering this' wood do so at their own risk, for though common snakes are not of tea found, the Corylus Americana abounds everywhere about here and never gives, warning, of its presence." «■ . * • •. CLOTHES WITHOUT COUPONS. Hundreds of women in London are walking about in their husbands' suits, although no one would know it. The lack of clothing coupons is behind ili all. Women are. persuading their hus-* bands to hand over their old suits—* * if the cloth is still good—and they are having them turned and converted, into tailor-made costumes for them-* selves. The exclusive West End fashion? houses are busy •on this work, for which they are charging high prices. They are turning coats- and trousers, into two-piece tailor-mades, which are. • indistinguishable from brand-new cos^ tumes. Even waistcoats are not being wasted, for some millinery, houses are! turning them into, toques. As for the. men, unless they are willing to wear 5 utility suits, they are having to pay in-< creasingly for new attire. Material ot. " good quality is scarce, and therefore, dear; in addition, the, wages of cutter* s and tailors have advanced considers i- ably. n & * ■ » d INFORMATION, h Dear Percy Flage,—Re inquiry by "A> d Free Czech" in your column tonight? !•" "Good Soldier Schweik" is mentioned, * on p. 248 of Paul Taboris's "Epitapb, |f for Europe" as being a book written by P- Jaroslav Hasek, the Czech Rabelais, 1S "Schweik was a symbol of all Czechs? c during the weary centuries of oppress •® sion. He was sly, utterly amoral, fondi & of the good things of earth, intensely n realistic, loyal to his own code, and-4 n happy. His adventures exposed the; 3 ramshackle rottenness of a declining ~ empire. Schweik must have been a! \l godsend to many a Czech whose inborn 0 inferiority complex survived- the email-* a cip%tion of independence," Paul Taboris. ' writes: "I can well imagine thousands of Schweiks working in the Skoda f ac-* tories, by tiny errors turning the Ger* x l man shells into duds and immobilis* o ing the German tanks just when mo% ' bility becomes most urgent." g> Hoping . this brief resume of }° Hasek's "truly immortal 'Good Soldiex? »n Schweik'" will be of interest to "A| s" Free Czech."—Yours, sincerely, "MAUD MACH.* nt * • * ' * °l BALLADE OF COLUMN 8. to How sad we were when war decreed at A cut in Percy Flage's cheer! es We hoped we'd have a larger feed; ir- We kept that hope from year to yeatv n- We'd*rather have a cut in beer, re Now Justice triumphs over hateid The nations soon will drop all fear-* re The people want full Column Eight. r o . Less butter? Meat? We have no greedlj For rationed tea we shed no tear; o^ In clothing, shoe's, we saw the neecj „■■; To put ourselves in lower gear, he Especially as they were so dear. he But cuts in jokes we deprecate; IS _ To ration fun—we think—is queer. e k The people want full Column Eight. So now when German tides recede, \.e And drums of doom the Nazis heaxj , ' We think the time has come, indeed nf To send some curbings to the reait ? a The space for jests should reappear! 3S> We surely have not long to wait; P. The time to celebrate draws near. J- 1" The people want full Column Eight*. !es Oh, then, for tea and beer and meadK ne Oh, won't the city be ornate! ey To "don'ts" and "cants" we'll pay ncfc ng heed. The people want full Column Eigh.% LEO FANNING. \1- # * * J e CONFLICT OF WORDS. he Dear Percy Flage,—l was interested! )m in the article on the "Battle of Words'?' ed which appeared in the "Evening Post* to of Thursday last, especially the refer* ;ar ence to the "British offering a safe* Hi- conduct pass to German soldiers wisW ay, ing to surrender." It reminded me ofi to a conflict of words between Sir Sidney of Smith and Napoleon during the siege rt- of Acre in 1799—the Egyptian ' cam* er- paign. Sir Sidney Smith, who was in] charge of the defences, and a veritt ;he able thorn in Napoleon's side, hads , an issued a proclamation to the effect that ar . French soldiers deserting from the a Napoleonic banner would be granted a >he free and safe passage to France. Napo* a ]_ Icon issued a counter-proclamation, inky which he asserted that Sir Sidney Dm Smith was stark, staring mad, and was i til to be i pitied. This so enraged Sir Sid* nd ney ttiat he issued a challenge to Napo* a t e leon to meet him in single combat. Lon Bonaparte replied: "If Sir Sidney Smith; ust will bring Marlborough back from the > c i_ grave (Napoleon was a great admirer ; re of Marlborough as a general), I will fk e think it over. In the meantime, if the t e _ gallant commodore wishes to display -lot his Person^l prowess I will neutralise a jns few yards of the beach and send one zis of b^ tall grenadiers with whom he can gjfg run a tilt." , • ; a Pahiatufe/ • -