POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXXV, Issue 25, 30 January 1943, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

Undertakers' sign in Detroit: Japanese Business Welcomed Here. The statue of the famous musician Mendelssohn was destroyed by Nazi order. He was a Jew. » « ♦ Bill Bledsoe: "The pen may have been mightier than the sword, but can the typewriter compete with the tank?" . « ♦ * POEM. No funking In Chungking. They never appease The Japanese. • bijj^ * ♦ • LIMERICK. Said Goebbels the gabbler to Hit: "Old Goering's too fat now to sit; Though his uniform' maker Takes full half an acre Of cloth for one trouser—'twould split" —Anonymous. * » . * TOP PRICE! Well, your nomenclators were requested to try their art on the 1400 guineas Foxbridge—Rippling Waters youngster. . ' Chanticleer is asked to decide between Ripplet, mark left by rippling waters, and Lapping, sound made by rippling waters against the foxbridge. K. * * # FOR PUNTERS. A humorous incident is noted in "Racing England" in a chapter on bookmakers: "At a small meeting there were three runners for a race—the betting being, 5 to 4 on the favourite, 7 to 4 against the second fancy, and 3 to 1 against the outsider. There was a regular gamble oh the two fancied runners, but for the outsider there was no demand. Then a Scots genUenwn asked if a layer would bet him £300 to £100 about the hopeless one. The bet was made, and, again offered, it was accepted by the backer. It was then that the layer, a little surprised, asked his client, "What do you know of the horse?" "Nothing whatever," said the Dundonian. "but the other two belong to me." * * • BRINGING IN THE SHEAVES. ' (J.J.C.) ■ About twenty years ago in a prison situated not one hundred miles away from Wellington Divine seryice. was being held one Sunday morning in the women's portion of the building. The hymn selected by the gaol chaplain was entitled "Bringing m the Sheaves," the Chorus of which ran thus: — Bringing in the sheaves, Bringing in the sheaves, We shall come rejoicing Bringing in the sheaves. Some of the "hardheads" of the choir decided to alter the chorus slightly to bring it more in keeping with the surroundings, and they sang the chorus with glee and gusto and much to the consternation of the chaplain, thusly:— Bringing in the thieves, Bringing in the thieves, We shall come rejoicing " Bringing in the thieves. » * * THE NEED FOR TWO. Digger, leaning against a post, was feeling off colour after a night out, when a Tommy Staff Officer rode up. "Soldier, hold my horse," he said haughtily. "Will he kick?" asked the Digger. •!No." "Will he bite?" "No, he won't bite." "Does it take two to hold him?" "No, certainly not, he is a quiet horse."

"Well, hold him your ruddy self!"