POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXXII, Issue 84, 6 October 1941, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE x

"Nutts" wants to know if the "ghost" walks for the Ghost Voice on Fridays. ,** - * It was the trout, not their hunters, who had a bonny run in blitz -week. *. * * Cannot Hitler be just a scream when he works himself up. against his enemies? . * #.'■»■ Some of those Isle of Man internees appear to be living a Manx cat-and-dodge life these days. * * * Notices posted recently at golf clubs near London:—"Emergency rule; Players may pick out of any bomb crater, dropping ball not nearer hole without penalty. Ground littered with debris may be treated as ground under repair." * * ."' * LIMERICK. The Dagoes defending Tobruk When Anzacs came round took their hook. Said they: "Comrade Fritz, This Anzac damn blitz » Has damaged our pants . . . have a look!" "PABLO." * . * # ' INQUIRY. Dear Flage,-r-In a picture titled "Hullabaloo" and screened in Wellington theatres of recent' months, a negro tenor of magnificent quality sang two songs. Can any of your readers en- . lighten me as to his name? Regards, "RANZ." As we never, never go to the movies, the question must be left to those who do. Now, gentlemen—— * * x '■■*'■'•' ACROSTIC. Dear Flage,—Through retiring too soon after reading Column 8 and whilst suffering from a temporary attack of insomnia <this was the result: Churchill Hunting U-boats Relentlessly Consequently . Having b Inevitable ' Last Laugh Forgive me, A. RAEDER. *■ - - - * * ROCKET BOMB. It was a Briton, Colonel Congreve, who designed the first successful war rockejt. Congreve's rocket carried a heavy cast-irdn head, was about three times as heavy as the largest cannon ball in use in the early 19th century, and had a range of- about one and- ahalf miles. The British Rocket Corps used such rockets at Waterloo. Krupps acquired the rocket patents of the Swedish rocket pioneer, Lieutenant Baron -von, Unge, in 1910, hoping, no doubt, to improve on them. Now American experts are forecasting that super-rockets, able tei. throw bombs equal in power to a 24-inch shell, will soon be a regular feature of modern war. ■ These rockets would : outrange the fire of A.A. guns and climb over any balloon barrage. It is claimed that the speed of their flight would render them invulnerable to any opposition. ''*■.' - . #■ *' WAR SLANG. This war is producing a new batch of army slang, though so far it is not so picturesque as in 1914-18. The most universal expression, equivalent to the now obsolete "fed up," is "browned off." One stage further than "browned off" is "well baked.'* "Rompers" is the army word for battle dress; a truck, car, or lorry is a "bug." "On the peg" means being under fcharge for misdemeanour; a "regatta" is the scrubbing of barrack rooms. A "winkle-bag" is a cigarette. "Going on the stunt" is going on manoeuvres. "F.A.Q." means "I am going now"—from the command to file away quietly. An "old bull" is a bluff to conceal ignorance. An R.A.F. pilot calls his cockpit the "pulpit" or the "office." "Driving the train" is leading two squadrons into battle. The instrument releasing the bombs, an electric distributor, is called a "Mickey Mouse." ■ * * * DEMAGOGUE. The most mendacious demagogue the world has ever known, A self-appointed tyrant whose heart is made of stone. He calls himself the Fuhrer, this vile, sadistic creature, . Who from a moral point of view has no" redeeming feature. His great ambition seems to be the whole world to control, And to achieve that purpose, in hell • has pawned his soul. In return for the aid of friends, no humans live that know So well how to enslave folk as the Devil's Ges-ta-po. But he is getting restless, his plans are in a mess, He cannot even emulate the flight of his friend Hess. The Russians have' tricked him, this leader of the Huns, By killing off his brutal hosts and silencing his guns. The R.A.F. are gradually accounting for his planes, - And the good old British Navy are lessening his gains. Our factories are making war material galore, And our friends in U.S.A. are greatly adding to the store. In time this would-be-mighty man will have a sticky fall, And wish that he had stuck to sticking paper on the wall. NOTA BENE. * *• # KAIWARRA DERELICT. A. F. Wiren writes: In reference to the Kaiwarra derelict wreck, might I add a quota which; may have some bearing on the matter. Some 50 years ago a steamer was purchased to carry Mokau coal to the Wellington market. It was necessary to obtain a vessel of light draught in" order to negotiate the river bar. VA steamer which met this difficulty was obtained, but she, however, had v seen better days and often required patching up. She wa% not of- large tonnage, her pace was slow, and., she consumed a good proportion-of; her-, cargo. Before long financial troubles began. Litigation in the courts ensued. A well--known storekeeper, Mr. J. M. Cleland, of Molesworth Street, had put some money in the venture, and I think, held a bill of sale. At the height of the trouble the vessel broke from her moorings during a southerly gale, and was thrown* on the Kaiwarra beach,, where she lay, at any rate-for. some time. She was possibly the Karamea. bl cannot recollect how the dispute ended; ' One of your = correspondents mentioned the Gannet. That was the name of a small pleasure steamer built to the order of Mr. Ewing, a timber merchant, of Courtenay Place. She was a natty little craft, and on Hex first appearance in Poneke Harbour received a friendly notice from "The Post." The last I heard of her was when she was engaged carrying the settlers' mails in Pelorus Sound.