POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXVI, Issue 45, 22 August 1938, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE { Anyhow, Leyland is no hit-or-miss driver. . * » * Just for a change: How much will the Opposition's social security scheme cost the country? * « * Football: Lost at the Athletic Park last Saturday, two players; please (forward) Golin Pringle and Jim Fleming (back) to the selector. HATAITAI. * * * James (Clareville): I wonder what old Dave Lloyd George, who gloated over the . collapse of the ramshackle Austro-Hungarian Empire, things of the succession republic described in • the "Daily Mail" as the "festering sore of Europe"? * . * * WE WONDER! Dear Flage,—lf (or should I say when) the Medical Practitioners' Union comes out on strike is it the intention of the Government to introduce "strike breakers"? And if so, what will be the attitude of unionists gen*, erally to it —I mean "free labour," Oh, shade of W. S. Gilbert! What will hap. pen to our aching teeth if the "Gum Diggers" Union" comes out in sympathy, with the medical practitioners? I. ASKEW. * * * NOMENCLATURE. Dear Sir, —I have been asked to let Mr. Hutchison know how Tinakori Road got its name. It was this way.. The labour party was just finishing when the dinner call blew from Thorndon Barracks on the flat nearby.( The ganger in charge said: "We are so nearly finished, boys, we will finish before going to dinner." A Maori in the party who only spoke broken English said: "By korry—Kahori tina ' tenei rangi. (No dinner today). Name the road 'Tina kori 1" (no dinner), and it was so. " WIREMU NIHONUI .■■'.' # ♦ *. CRIME MUSEUM. It is amazing the length to which some criminals will go in their preparations to outwit the law. Among the ingeniously forged notes and cheques of all denominations in the crime museum of Scotland Yard is a most surprising exhibit. It is a postal, order for 3s ,6d which one forger must have spent many hours ia altering to 8s 6d. It was not a mere matter of changing the large black figures, but of re-drawing the minute-ly-printed inner frame composed of "three and sixpence, three and six- ' pence" repeated over and over again and substituted "eight and sixpence." It is a superb example, of minute and accurate penmanship: but , for the sake of the five shillings gain,' a surprising waste of time unless it was done for sheer love of the art of forgery. ■'■■». ♦ . * PROCRASTINATION PLUS. His name was John Robinson. His motto was: "Never do today "what you can put off till tomorrow." He died at the age of 85, and it is recorded that, no one was really sorry when he went, for he.was dfnfeult i!i;b;get"dii with", and somewhat queer. He was queer in the respect that he was always going to da something by and by-.1 One of his odd ,ways was" to attend auction sales, and bid for anything which" he saw someone else was determined to have. It .- was a hasty trick Of his> especially as . he had no use for the articles. That did, not matter. He would go on bid* ding for it, even if he had a score of such things or could never hope to use one of them. When anyone asked him what he would do with it he would say, "Oh, it will come in by and by." For years he kept a horse at an inn in the town. But he did not ride. He said that he did not mind paying for its keep, and that he would be riding it by and by. He never did. He was often asked to lend his horse to someone who needed a steed to go upon a journey, and he never refused. .He said: "You'll have it by and by" It, was as good as a refusal.. To the very end he declared he would go out hunting, buying guns and dogs Even • a few days before he died he purchased some, new bags for bringing home the game. "But: you never go hunting," . said the man who sold the guns. "I' haven't yet," was : the bland - reply* "but I intend going by and by"! * # ♦ FACE-ACHE. The constant ache Keeps one awake ("That molar must come out.") " With many sighs / One frets and tries To end the wretched bout One feels so loth To lose the tooth And dreads the forceps pain. The dentist's chair, His ruthless pair" Of hands, too, haunt one's fcrain. But one, next day, The call does pay—• The chair would sit upon. Who can explainWhere, now, the pain? One bolts, for it is gone. ■ F.E.M.—S. Lower Hutt. : , * * ;♦■ INQUIRY BUREAU. Percy Flage,—Dear sir: A friend of . mine has asked me to write to you tot some information and I know you will oblige if possible. She arrived in New Zealand from England in 1930, took a trip Home in 1935, and was away thirteen months. In November, 1937, she divorced her husband, who is still in England. Could you please tell mm through Column 8: (1) If and when she will be entitled to the old age pension? She was born in July, 1898. (2) If and when she would be entitled to a spinster's (?). pension? (3) Would she be entitled to an invalid pension? (4) Does the absence of thirteen months make any difference in any case? . ... Thanking you in anticipation, I remain, yours faithfully, "CURIOUS." We are indebted to the Comttnlisioner of Pensions, Mr. H. Digby Smith, for the following answer to these questions:— 1. Under existing legislation she would qualify for old age pension (sub* ject to means test) on reaching ag* 60. The position would be; the same as regards age benefit under the proposed Social Security Scheme, but oa attaining age 65 portion of the age benefit would be merged in the superannuation benefit payable as of right. s j 2. "Spinsters' pensions" payable before age 60 are not provided for either in the present legislation or the Social Security Bill. 3. If permanently incapacitated for work she would become eligible for invalidity pension (invalids* benefit under the Bill) eleven years from the date of her first arrival in New Zea-~ land if her absence in the intervening period had not exceeded thirteen months as stated in the letter. 4. Only as regards invalidity pq* sion. Cor. invalids' benefit! as abov^ -■