POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXIII, Issue 70, 24 March 1937, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

St Perot Flack.

Anyhow, you can bet your last shilling that those "sit-dpwn" strikers are on the inside of things. # * . • In Denver a junk shop near a railroad crossing displayed this sign: "Go ahead; take a chance. - We'll buy the car." * * ♦ Cook, the veteran heavyweight, is reported to be seeking fresh opponents. At his age he had better wait until they've gone a bit stale. • * • ■ The people of Rouen, France, during the middle ages, stopped eating butter so they might build the famous "Butter Tower" on their beautiful Gothic cathedral. Today Hitler asks Germany to eat less butter so the Nazis may buy more cannons. • * * CRICKET INCIDENT. Not interested in our golf pars, "Bodyliner" sends along the following cricket story. During a match between Lancashire and the M.C.C., Whitehead, of the M.C.C., while endeavouring to deliver ; the ball, lost his grip of it, and it fell a.few.yards up the pitch. A. N. Hornby, who was batting, ran out to Kit it, but, the bowler reached the ball first, and, throwing it to the 'keeper, the batsman was given run out. Hornby protested that Whitehead had obstructed him and prevented him from reaching the ball. * * * ■ SOCIETY SPRING CLEANING., We read that the clean-up of English society has begun, and when tfrs invitations for the Royal functions such as Royal Ascot, Buckingham Palace banquets and garden parties, and presentations at Court are out, many people (male and female) in high' places will find themselves omitted. This applies to hosts and hostesses of the type which the all-powerful Archbishop of Canterbury criticised in his broadcast after the abdication of King Edward. Guilty parties in divorce cases will be barred from any of these functions. Debutantes who have been conspicuous at wild cocktail parties -will also be cut out. So also will hostesses who have invited doubtful people to their own private parties. Dowagers who make a living by chaperoning debutantes for fees, and undertaking to get them desirable introductions, will also be barred. GROUP TERMS.' Last year we featured here some group terms—serious ones, in use in England—like, for example, a "gaggle" of geese. Inspirationally several cf our co-operatives (if that's the word) on this staff have invented a few group names, along the following lines:— A sodden of drunkards.V. ". ' An acclamation of heroes. A vituperation of shrews.' y A bother of. bosses. , A wile of widows. A huddle of home-brewers. If any of our more imaginative Postscripters can equal, or better,, those, we shall be glad to hear from them. It's a fine mental exercise, anywaymuch more exhilarating than interpreting an income tax assessment or sorting out the . Easter: winners' .by the Chinese system. ,-. ... .* * ♦ • INQUIRY DEPARTMENT. ■"Abercorn."—(l) Ask' us ; something easier.1 (2)' The latest. De.brett reveals that whereas Queen Maud of Norway is now the sole surviving member of the family of Edward Vll'and Queen Alexandra there are as many as- three of Queen Victoria's. children still living: the Duke of Connaught, Princess Louise Duchess of Argyll,, and Princess Beatrice. . J.B. (Brooklyn) .—lt is estimated that John D. Rockefeller's gifts to the organisations "for the promotion of the well-being of mankind" exceed £132,000,000. One authority, gives the Carnegie benefactions as amounting to £70,000,000. "Owzatt!" —You win. The ex-Sur-rey veteran, Bobby Abel, died a couple of months ago. Barnes is still in the land of the living ... up in the' Lancashire League district. Al Johnson.—These are the lines (from "The Yak") you want; : His name is derived from a curious word Which ; implies in the Tibetan tongue, A dull onomatopoetical sound, Like a wiffle defending its young.. We do not know the name of the author. * * * RUTHLESS RHYMES.' More last lines for that incomplete ruthless rhyme of ours which. goes— - Daddy, in the stove one night, Pushed a plug of dynamite. Said the^ Coroner: " . . . . "Lazy Jim's" contributions: ...... "Ah me! Marvellous stupidity." Said the Coroner to Mum: "Daddy's gone to Kingdom come." "Aubrey the Anarchist": .... .."I find Daddy had an absent mind." "Ginger".—- . . ... "Serve him right. No' doubt Dad was som"ewhat tight." From K.K.R. (who forwards further ruthless rhymes).— Said the Coroner in sad lament: "Dadda's gone, but where's he went?" And just to keep the pot boiling— here's another of our own to be completed— Johnny, with the rolling pin, Did his little sister in. Said his mother peevishlyAfter an Easter egg or two; our bright clients should'be able to provide some really scintillating : fourth, lines. # # • A MOTHER'S. PORTAGE: Dear Flage,—Apropos your note on long human portages, what about the following New .Zealand. instance? I quote from "A History of Puhoi," by the Rev. Father Silk: : "We.had.not only to walk to Auckland and carry our purchases back,, but we had also, whenever the occasion arose, to carry our sick and v/ounded there for treatment; While the late Mr. Russek was erecting his little nikau whare, one of his children climbed up the ladder he had placed against the building, and in coming down fell and broke its leg. This child the mother took on her back, carried it to Auckland for medical treatment, and then trudged back- again to Puhoi." ■- ' Puhoi is situated on the coast about thirty miles north of Auckland. . The road at present is nearly perfect, but I may say I walked the distance on the day the late William Massey.died, laden with a light suitcase, and did not like it at all, so that what Mrs. Russek put up with can best be left to the imagination. In 1863 there were no roads, four respectable streams to ford (Waiwera, Orewa, Wade, and Okuru), and hilly, bush-clad country to traverse. Yours sincerely, , . LEIF ERICSSON: '