POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXII, Issue 32, 6 August 1936, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

Bi Pehcit Flacb.

We are thoroughly in accord with the Government's, give-and-take policy—so long as it doesn't 'take anymore. * * # Anyway, from the outset it was a dark outlook for the non-American, track men at the Olympic Games.- ---* » ♦ After this all-in Spanish donnybrook, bull-fighting will be almost as exciting as a lunch on skim milk and a wheatmeal biscuit. * ♦ ♦ A silencer which may be applied to "machine-guns, motor-engines,' .and other forms of explosive machinery" has been invented. Wars without head* aches, what! .■•■■■■.• • HARD CHEESE! "Omadhaun."—Our dairy farmers, now that they receive payment for their services from the Government, may be held to be civil.servants, but somehow or other they don't all appear to be anxious to guarantee that they will be civil. Like pussy, they want butter on their paws. * ,'■ * * A FORETASTE. This epigrammatic quip is from th» London "Star," and was forwarded by "Erbert," an exile in the Strand. New Zealand's Minister of Labour says that he will not be satisfied until the workers are living up to the standard of American millionaires. We must not slightingly condemn His scheme as less than naught, For he's already given themPlenty of food—for thought!. GNAT. * # * . HEARD THIS ONE? (Passed on by "Mary Jane.") First Girl Hiker: I inserted an a<V yertisement in our local newspaper recently under a box number for a male partner to accompany me on a fortnight's hiking-trip. Second Girl: How interesting. Did you have many replies? First Girl; Yes,; hundreds, but there was a terrible row in the house over itSecond Girl: Good gracious, why? First Girl: Father was one of the aj* plicants! *■■■~» * ■ INFORMATION BUREAU. *' . In reply to "Arcturus" (Highland Park): The man who "invented those comfortable pants, Oxford bags," was Dr. Thomas Ethelbert Page, a 'famous Greek scholar,' who died several months ago at the age. of 86. Dr. Page was a well-known "character." Regardless of dress convention, he wore incredibly baggy trousers of amazing cut for half a century, with" a black jacket and a bowler hat. From these the wide Oxford' "bags" that had 'a real vogue for so long were copied. "Wairoa Belle" (Picton) .—Unable to give you the "biggest' race dividend in the world," but last. May a lucky punter at Newbury (England) collected £2108 in return for a 10s stake oa the tote, daily double. C.M.J.—Have no information on that matter. "Wager."—lß-3 wins. "Trusty."—Lst us have a 'look _ at them, though we fancy we have already dealt with them. » « « BRAIN-TEASER. - It" is curious to note, that- "Punlca's" ■problem floored a number of our most experienced puzzlers while.less, experienced entrants aver they arrived at a solution with little or no brain strain. That is unexpected but gratifying, both to "Punka" and ourselves. Since our last announcement six. - correct solutions have been received "by 'phone, and seven more by mail. Five crashed. Those successful (up to this morning) are: "Spud" (Wades'town), a first attempt, "Ping Pong" <who adds a kindly note arient Column 8), "O'L." (whom we misled over the 'phone— our apologies), "Percival" (Petone), "Tim" (Miramar), "Birdie," T.C.L. (Karori);. "Not So Hot," "Student,"-.'an*' "Always Interested" (Northland). Three solvers who rang us up left no name, initials, or pseudonym. As a matter of fact, we would rather they chose a pen-name; then they could be included in the honours list. By the way, another Postscripter ' (D.M.) would like a bouts-rimes game for a change. Maybe we shall run- one presently as an alternative to ; the brain-teaser for those who prefer the rhymed-endings notion. *. * * MORNING TEA.MONOLOGUE. Great things is 'appenin' this week. Over in Spain, where Greek meet» Greek, The tugga war among that race Is ragin' at a torrid pace. (Which minds me, when a grown-up kid, I'eard Pa sing, "In Ole Madrid" Aw, well!) The big Olipimid Games, Also our private hinterest claims Becos they make for peace; I 'ear That said most hevery secon' year, But in between the nations seethe An' at each other snap their teeth. Then there's the Budget what cams down " ■; (With a dull thud) our joys to crown. The taxpayers sing-'n'-dance, what hoi The sheep kings do likewise also, An* now we've 'ad- a Harbour Day, What makes a merry week, I'll say. As one who pays no hincome tax I think that Nash is right. 'E smacks It on to them who 'as the brass • (The which was due to come to pass). An' tempts the wind to the shorn lamb Whose little life was worth a d a (But nothink more) till Labour came. Like ole St. George, eyes belching flame, A gun in each 'and, to lie low The dragon what all workers know. 'Eaven's on their side, an' they will wia Through butter-fat an' think-'n'-thin Till Noo Jeruzelcm takes its stand Upon our green-V-pleasant land. Another thing, dear. Bill-'n'-me On Wednesdee planted a young tree Which, whea it grows, will 'ide us from The dame n«t' door—a Peepin' Tom— A most inquisitive ole thing Art longin', dearie, for the Spring? * : ■ • . ■■■■ ' ♦ SOCIAL POPPYCOCK. . When we are feeling dolorous, if not Savage, with things, -we turn to the society columns of the "modern" London journals and become rational again Here are two characteristic splashes of "goof": A well-known Mayfair lovely wura a white macintosh en a rainy oar in Curzon Street. Behind her scuttled a small pug dog. AJso in wane mackintosh belted round the weist. A "Mayfair lovely"-is particularly priceless. Lastly, this: In the middi* ii her lecture Mm«. Maillart produced barley-flour, butter, and a bowl. She made a mixture-, rolled it into a little cake, R *it, without any more ado, she pi.it tJiat little cake into her mouth and ate it—uncooked. A few minutes later Baroness . who had been listening interestedly, tried her hand at making a cake. And when she'd finished she ate it raw. And enjoyed

Doesn't that "stirring" episode giv« you that younger-than-ever feeling?