POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXVI, Issue 21, 25 July 1933, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

The "world was created in seven days. It took man longer to muss it up, but you must agree he made a good job of it. ' . * # « •If aviation science continues to" develop so surprisingly, there will soon bs no need for the Posts and Matterhs of the future to accompany robot pilot! on around-tho-world flights. • # » Jai'dine ivill not be the only one disappointed at not having to demonstrate the legitimacy of "body-line" bowling in the Test against the West Indies. Constantino and Martindale will regret it, too. ■ # * » According to one who should knW, the unification of Germany is so complete that it includes even the German chess clubs. But what about the beekeepers and the stamp collectors—af« they .patriotically sound! # # ♦ TRUE STORY. Bini: Bob and Eva 'are- getting maf« ricd. . Bam: But they're both out of work, and too poor to marry. ■ . ■. Bim: Tosh! It's just as easy (and nicer) to be poor together as to b.e poor apart. * # ♦ THEWOBH IS TURNIN.G. Pair woman continues to Boadice* into man's preserves with disquieting success. Latest example: A girl won, the marbles championship in ari English provincial school. That hurts, .but don't forget that a mere male person, in one of our suburbs took first prize in an important section of a locally-rua knitting competition.; ' * *■ # ROUND THE WORLD. Jules Verne, a writer of the Victorian days, wrote a book, "Round the World in Eighty Days," which, was consid' ered a wild flight of imagination at that time, ... "Who'd have thought they would do it in seven? . ■ : Eighty was my prophetic boast,". Said old Jules Verne, as he leaned from! heaven ■ .... And watched the man-eagle, Wile* Post, Swinging along from coast to coast. "Makes us look small —we ancient fools— We're back numbers now," sighed pool old Jules. PEARLEEN. , » » » RECOVERY SCHEME PUBLICITY. It was, of course, to be expected. The Roosevelt giant recovery plan possesses a special publicity department i of its own. Among the first of its officers hired were a group of experienced newspaper men and advertising experts, whose job is to "put over" the scheme to the nation.. It is estimated that when the ballyhoo pai-t of the "drive" gets under way the departmental chief will have half a hundred publicity; "executives" under his control.- A regular city newsroom will be in operation. At least one, if not two, report- - ers will be assigned to cover each industry. For example, one man will - b»assigned to steel, one to copper, one to coal, ono to textiles, one to management (the employers), and one to labour (the .employees). The personnel of the heads of the concern is some sort of guarantee that if the schema misses fire> it will not be because iti publicity officers /failed. '»#• * • . POSTED .... MASSING. "Relief Worker."—Good work in a" technical sense, but publication might lead to misunderstanding. Thanks. ".To." —More suited to one of our weeklies. :; < "Ambling Ambrose."—Sorry, but comets, past or to come, have not interested this column recently. ■ ■ "Blather," "E.0.E.," "Scottie,1 * > "Switchboard," and several others.— Limericks must have point and should rhyme with reasonable consistency. Yours 'don't/ "Ignoramus."—Unable to see what the conundrum is driving at. "Ballyhoo."—That describes it ap-.. propriately. "M.B.O."—Bather neat, but that subject is verboton. "Patsy" (Palmerston North).—Watch out for the answer to that "Rugger", questionnaire. "X-travagant."— Inspired by "'Orace's" "X-actly," and not as clever as it might be. "Kiltie"'(Petone). —No£ for the present, anyway. . * » # WHEN PROSPERITY RETURNS. Dear Flage,— Returning prosperity (ahem!) and what not have induced me to pen th« following:— ; , The 'optimis-hv-Say little fellows, Tell us the'depression has. gone. Each one of them jumps lip and bel« lows, ■, "You're all doing well. Carry on!" They tell us the clouds have all shifted, - The'slump", at the end of its stay, Has packed up its troubles and drifted A million and one miles away. They say that the price of our butter Has risen, and still is to rise, And each little tale that, they utter Brings still better hope to our eyea. But hope of prosperity makes us Give vent to a pitiful sigh, The very suggestion so shakes us It brings a cold tear to the eye. For we see, to our very great sorrow, ■ A sorrow that sinks to the soul, That if good times came,back here to* morrow .. We should all have to go off the dole! . : E.N.T. . . •■ * * THE SENTIMENT OP FAREWELL. "■ From "John Splendid," a quasi-his-torical novel by Neil Munro (1898), a book that should be read and enjoyed by every man with Highland blood m his veins, I copy the enclosed passage. I think it will bo feelingly "Amend by the largo majority of readers of, Col. 8. . ,' "The essenco of all human melancholy is in the sentiment of farewells.' There are people roving about tho world, today here, tomorrow afar, who cheat fate and avoid the most poignant wrench of this common experience by, letting no. root of their affection strike into a homo or a heart. Self-contained, aloof, unloved, and unloving, they make their campaign through life in movable tents that they strike as gaily a3 they, - pitch; arid beholding them thus evade the one touch of sorrow that is most inevitable and bitter to every sensitive soul, I have sometimes felt an envy. h of their fortune. . . . Cold and heat, the contumely of the slanderer, the insult of the tyrant, the agues and fevers of the flesh, the upheavals of personal for- 1 tune, were events a robust man might face with calm valiancy if ho could bo spared the cheering influence of.the homely scene or the unchanged presence of his familiars and friends. I have sat in companies and put on-,an affected mirth, and laughed and sung with the most buoyant of all around, and yet ever and anon I chilled at the-intruding .notion of life's brevity." 1 yffrc hobo.