POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXV, Issue 140, 16 June 1933, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment BY PERCY FLAGE If'Herr Habicht persists-in his hunger strike he will have plenty of foodfor thought. ' ■ . * . * .♦ '. Those animadversions of Senator Glass on America's past attitude to her debtors ring .crystal- clear, ami are transparently true to fact. » « i ■• If is getting so in this country that ■ our silver-tongued orator (who is h,c?)> travelling to Australia, would-have his throat searched by the Customs ofli'.. cials. * * ' f ■■. "Off-swinger" pipes in with the assertion that he always felt "that the sub-committee of the M.C.C. (Muddling Cricket Conservatives) was likely to turn testy over that intimidatory bowling charge.*' • . .- *„ * -« • •' THAT DEEP-SEATED SHINE. Wearers of blue serge suits of 1931-32 vintage may glean a grain of comfort from the fact that overseas fashion dictators have decreed that ' material that shines, is to be the thing this season. ':"■:■'■/■ ♦-,■.■♦' -'•'•' . ''■ LOCAL PHENOMENA. Prom* "Anon."— / , A co-respondent writes informing us that a policeman was seen running in Lambton Quay today.' AYe haw, ma-dp inquiries and find that there .is a, perfectly satisfactory explanation-r----he was: going off duty. The fog was so thick the other day that a wharf labourer was seen t« lurch into a tea.'shop. '■ ' ■. V PERENNIAL-ANNUALS. , ' Dear Percy Flagej-vl, too, was very surprised to find, that- our -gardening expert has classed sticks—along, witii Iceland poppies—as hardy ANNUALS. My stock of sticks'have so far stuck to the PERENNIAL class; but probably the expert has found that, with the serious depredations wrought /of late by Mr. Weta, he. has had to reduce the estimated life of stick* — hence tliQir now coming under the cat*t gory of annual, . F ■ . Yours 'umbly, ' . URIAH HEEP. " ' v #■.*, ■*v* • -, DIVERSION IN THE ADS. ' - Dear Percy,— ■ I noticed in this evening's 'Tost* two advertisements:—-"Lawn mowers, cash registers, guns, Jocks, and tools'-of all kinds.are sharpened and. repaired at the shortest' notice and at reasonable prices." Can you tell me; Low they, sharpen cash registers? "Timely alarm saves.a disastrous fir* at,a Wholesale AVarehouse; portion of, goods damaged mainly by water purchased by us." I hope they did nob have to pay tpo big a price for tha water. ■ . *- ■■. ' ■ ', ■ •'■■',■ /-. ■' - , ■ / ■•..■■ . - >,BILVA. j ■ ' ■ */.#_•:: ~."• AND NOW—COCOA! • ! This item is intended as a sop !•■ tho.hurt" sensibilities of Mr. • , who. is no lover of beer, or of odes to that disgracefully companionable ■ and bus- i "tailing beverage. World Conference* are. the vogue, as you knojv. The next one will meet to discuss regulating't&a supply of COCOA. That is, if any of the Powers is listening to Trinidad. ..-••■ Tire Legislature of that tight (hai'ha!) -■ -j-. little' island -in the: Caribbean"-'ljarr: unanimously adopted a resolution requesting the British Government to summon aii international assembly to formulate a scheme with "the pu'rpos-3 stated. Cocoa is.as .important to th(» Trinidads (and' the Trinimas) as butter is to this country. We are glad of this opportunity thus to put, ourselves (and this column) onside with -—p, who, without prejudice, Hve' nominate in anticipation- as .New; Zealand's ■■„-. representative. If this conference were to be held in London's Geological Museum^, and the-long bar was, still_ . working, why, we might, consider' an offer to.act as -'s private "secretary. \ Impartiality could scarce go; further. .'■>"- .a :. :», :' ■ ■'; ■■■.■.' ' ' ' BILL'S IN TROUBLE. This clipping came from .. The- author is not known. ,■. ■ : I've got a letter, Parson, f'/m. my soa away out West, An' my;old heart is heavy :as an anvit in my breast. . / His letters come so seldom that I some- . how sort o'knowed That Bill was trampin son amighly; v . ' rocky road.' . ': ' ';.-.■.. ',-■.. But never once imagined lie would bojr mj'head in sbamei ; An' in' the dust u'd '. waller his .ol» ,daddy's Jionoured name. , . , He , writes from ' out in' Hilltown, an' ; the story's mightj' short. I can't just tell hismother/-it'll break lter poor o'l' heart; ( An' so I reckon, Parson, .you-might - ■ break the news to her — "../ , Bill's in the Legislature; but he doesn't say what fur!' , '••.'■' • '. ■'.'•■..•" • '•■■-■"■'. THE "WETS'* GO OVER THE TOP. Dear Percy,—l just.have^to take » crack -at' the. guy whose comment appeared at the ,foot: ofr column 8 oii Thursday :last. He signs off with a -dash .«<__.»" Ho could easily have faded ; out with ' the nom-de-plume, "DRY."!' His bone of contention .is s that "wet" comment should be discontinued. I maintain they should be continued. lam not a toper, beer sponger, or' a "lounge lizard," but I enjoy a glass of hops (home brew-not excluded), as much as"— —"enjoys his ciip of tea. Have I ever writ* ten to you and insisted that any comment made on tea drinking should-be excluded^from the column! No, siy. "Everyone to his own taste. What* biting " ," anyhow! Isn't he satisfied with the "Morning Tea Monologue"? Enough tea is brewed in that space, to satisfy any reasonable. advo- * catc of the teapot, for a .week. Th» only kick we "wets" get Vout of the. tea party, is when mention is made of / Bill icturning. homo from "The Pig and .Whistle" with a feeling of "no depression blues." Strange as' it may seen., ' I do not profess! to b.e a real "sport" . in flic true sense of the word. I tak« ■ only a. passing interest in fdotbail, wrestling, and racing,- which pastime* I know are generally thought to ba associated with those who profess tv be heavy weiglit-liftcrs of the pewter tankard. Nevertheless, I enjoy reading "Howitzer's" football howlers, listening to the "wrasling" over the air, or hearing. the story of the race-fan vwho arrived at Ti-eirthani with ten bob, and returned with ten pounds. My point is this, I am not obliged to read or listen to these things if I do not wish to, and " I suggest that " -" should adopt the sanio attitude when ' reading "Postscripts." Because he is a crank, with a kink for only "dry'? stories, are wo '^wots" to gp' for ever thirsting? Now; my advice to you.is watch your step. This fellow "— -?-" has a persuasive line of talk, and I'd hate to see yortr column racketoored over to the "drys." I have plenty of fa;th in your broadmindedness and censorship. May the reading matter ,in the column never tumble so low, that it is fit only for a pack of "pansy" boys to xead. Yours till the next conk pops, .' •