POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXV, Issue 111, 13 May 1933, Page 10

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle arid Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

If Hitler is not careful he will bur* Germany's boats behind him, too. • ♦ * What. about importing a cargo of infra red rays in order to give our \ leaders 'a clearer perspective ? • ■ ' '♦:.■■■ * Paradoxically, you can quite understand Hitler's envoy feeling a bit hot under the collar after receiving the cold shoulder in Downing Street, • • •' ' NEWS. Anent the blowing of a safe it the Morvcn railway station, we era heartened to read that the police'were communicated with and were promptly; on the scene. We wonder if they raft or went by car. # # ■■ * FROTHING WITH INDIGNATION. Said Pete: It is really a scandal, The game now is not worth the candle. I think beer is nice, But they'vo jumped up the price From fourpenco to fivepence a "handle.* * * # EXTREMELY CONVENIENT. Those of our politicians who like t» keep an ear to £ho ground may be interested to know that an Italian in* ventor has designed a radio walking stick which, .thrust, into the earthf enables its possessor to listen in. » .. . « • #■ AMAZONIAN BPINSTEBS. Visitors to Folkestone (Eng.) on* day last month were startled, and amused, to note a large banner hangiag across the main street inscribed "Colossal Spinsters' Ball." It is an easy guess that the modish Folkestone ' dress salons did a roaring trade in O.S. frocks, etc., that niemorablo weefc. # ■; • ..;■,♦ GAOL-BEEAKEHS. Flage,—Your par anent the Germaai prisonor who gnawed his way out of gaol reminds me of Frank yon Wezer, a_ German murderer. He was a moat persistent would-be escapee. First, he tried walking away when the prison, (in America) was enveloped in fog. Next ho tried to smuggle himself out in a garbage wagon. Finally, he hid in. the bakery oven—to be driven out hot« foot (excuse me!) when the fires wer* lit. JEMIMA JEMMY. ♦ : ♦ ■; ♦ INTIMIDATION IN CHESS. Flage,—Your suggestion for a remedy, for the "body-line" or win-at-all-costs form of attack would probably • prov» effective, but did you know that, according to a cable message to the Sydney; dailies, the same obnoxious spirit has crept into chess in Austria? At latest advices the Viennese chess players wero discussing, not the prospect of Auschluss, but the "bodylinische* strafe" of one competitor to the oh« much-worse '' zichauf beinmach-enzum> pavilton theorie" of another. Doein'^ it just go to show you? DON GIOVANNI. # ■ • ♦ SCHOOL'S IN. Do you know that — (1) Green trousers, introduced las| summer, will be the vogue in England this year for sports and' holiday-wear? '" (2) In 1932, the' record number of 1,436,849 factory-made wireless sets were sold in Britain, their total value being £19,323,0001 " ' (3) If you don't clean the enow from your front gate in Bucharest in 24 ' hours your water and electric light are cut off? ' (4) There is a 4000-year-old cypress tree at Oaiaca City, Mexico, .which, looks as though it will go on growing for evert (5) Snuff factories in England are working overtime in order to cope with! the sadden demand! In West End theatres, snuff-taking has become » craze. (6) A scientist-explorer on the1 Great Barrier (Queensland) states that he has seen a female turtle lay 189 eggs in 24 minutes? (7) All the revenue from Italy's bachelor tax goes to 'a national bureau for protection of mothers and infants!, ' Mussolini seems to possess a sly sense) of humour. (,8) Andorra, the tiny Bepublie in the Pyrenees, is prepared to employ twoj princes, salary 20 dollars a year in cash,, and two cows? .(9) Mrs. Boosevelt is receiving 25,000 dollars yearly for editing * magazine? This sum was fixed before the campaign, with the provision that the salary would be 50,000 dollars if; her husband entered the White House(10) The Department of Journalism of Yenching University, Peipinft China, reorganised since 1929, has thisv year 102 course "students and 571 "graduates"? ♦ ♦ • FBITZIE. Sometimes when we sit down at rrfghS J~ Beside a whispering fire to write ; As best we may, a jaunty rhyme, To help you pass away the time; While we are searching for a theme^ A harder task than you may deem-* I Sudden, from nowhere, she arrives, , A little lady.with nine-lives, And parks upon our pad, and purrs, Fixing us with those eyes of her 3. We chide her gently, and explain . We'd Tcally like her to remain, And have a hearthside tete-a-tete, All comfy, but our work won't wait, That soon, should we not get a start, All inspiration will depart, And probably the midnight chimes Will find us chasing' restless rhymes. But —bending us unto her will, She only nuzzles closer still. - Her coat is like black silk . . her eyet Are greener than the sea that lies; Soft to an autumn sun. Coquette, How easily she can forget! For when the lights have gone to bed Sh& will not think of love; instead Swift as a shadow, through the gloomy A miniature thunderbolt of doom, She falls upon the grey field-mice For her nocturnal sacrifice. o * # OMEN IN CYPHER. Do you know why the Germans werei doomed from the outset to lose the war that was" to make the world less safe for Democracy? A pen-brother of ours recently returned from the Islands found out when, in Apia, he encountered a Fatherlandcr with a ' picturesque goatee and an admirable f senso of- humour. The oxilo (and. happy at that) revealed the secret in ■ this wise. 'He printed in capitals the names of the first Allied leaders in the ! unparalleled donnybrook— JO F F B E FBE N C H Then, in a hushed atmosphere/ he' divided with a vertical line the tiro names, and requested our friend to mai-k the result. If you reverse the. order of the names the magic; missfires, "so1., be careful. Anyhow, this seems to us as significant and cpnvinc ing an explanation as to why Germany; was foredoomed to get' the axe vti 1914-18 as the hundred and one'others; which havo beeu advanced.